Melodie Michelle

Melodie Michelle: I'm back my friends! I had taken a break bc Stephen and I have gone through one of the most challenging times in our relationship. Y'all have followed our love story since I arrived on FanStory and you guys have been amazing to me. I'm putting myself out there to tell you all what has happened since a lot of my poetry will be on that issue and our healing from it as a couple. I found out that he had been cheating on me and let me tell you one thing, I thought I was going to literally die from the pain I was experiencing. He was arrested on August 30, 2023 again and on September 26, 2023 my entire world, as I knew it, was gone. I've never in my life felt so much pain in my life and I'm not exaggerating in the least bit!

I mean as my FanStory family, y'all knew EXACTLY how much I loved him, as you followed our love story so you can imagine the intense pain. I cried for four straight days and puked most of them as well. I was utterly devastated and wanted to die. I couldn't talk to him or confront him like I wanted too bc he was in the county jail. But I couldn't stand it any longer do one day he called and I had not sit that night bc him cheating wouldn't leave my mind so I was up all night before and when he called that morning he immediately asked what was wrong and I broke down and cried, while telling him what I'd discovered.

Remember too that he'd had a cerebral hemmorige a few months before, so with that bring said when I confronted him on the phone, he was very surprised and come to find out he didn't remember any of it but since I had proof, he knew he did it and he was so intensely remorseful bc he witnessed on the one how incredibly hurt I was bc of his actions.

Long story short, after a lot of deep reflection, I made my decision to stay with him. I made the decision to hold him down again as long as he needed me too. Good I'll do bad things all the time and I'm not different. No I didn't cheat but I don't even day and just bc my skin is different than his doesn't give me the right to hold it over his head. Now, right get me wrong FanStory fan, I wanted to choke him and ask WTF he was thinking and hit him until I felt better. But I surprised myself and handled it calmly but still letting him know in no uncertain terms that he shredded my soul and crushed my heart. He hated the fact that he's not so much pain on me.

He didn't remember bc of the cerebral hemmorige and only 26.9% of the population lives through one of those. So, he is meant to be here for whatever reason God has in mind. I couldn't dismiss all these years of him treating me like a queen being so amazing to me even during the time he had been cheating. I realized you cannot lump all cheaters together in a pile and say fu*k them thru cheated so leave them. It's not that black and white. It's not always once a cheater always a cheater. Good folks do bad things and you nor I are any different. Just bc he sinned differently than you or I have doesn't mean he's a bad person. It means he made a bad decision like we all do from time to time.

Thing is, he was out of character bc he's not a cheater, yet he cheated. I believe she of it was in fact was an addiction, mixed with him running from his feelings of being in love with me and he was trying toward married women and they were safe bc they didn't want any from him except his manhood. I totally understand addiction and seeking out people that wouldn't want any from him. I wasn't asking him for anything as I promised I wouldn't in the beginning. I told him if anything were to change in our relationship he would be there one too change it. I wouldn't beg him to move in with me or get married, I wanted to just enjoy what we had together. The day he was put in jail and after setting there for two days before I could get money to put in my phone so we could talk (((remember this was BEFORE I found out he cheated)))
once he called and I could answer he said baby, I realized sitting in here for the past two days exactly how I feel about you and I love you and I want you to move in the house with me and mom and start our lives together. He said all this in one breath and I was completely dumbfounded bc I never thought he would succumb to his feelings for me. I knew he'd been fighting them bc I know when he fell in love with me, I felt it and saw it but I never told him I knew except I hunted in my poems but that was it. If he would've said that to me AFTER I'd found out he cheated I would've just thought he was sukkkin up but it was BEFORE so I know he meant it from his heart.

God tried to sit him down once before bc Stephen is a workaholic and will exhaust himself and he'd he'd go to bed and he would fall asleep almost immediately. He had no time to think about anything at all. I told him that when he was in jail last time that God sat him down for a reason (((I just never knew what reason))) for him to think. Same reason He's set him down this time and he saw that this time and that's why he told me he realized how much he loved me, etc ... That always terrified him and that's why he never wanted to experiment love again. I told him that love didn't hurt him, bc his ex hurt him bc of her hatefulness and no compassion and no appreciative ass but love didn't hurt him. He finally sees what I've told him is true.

Sorry about the lengthy post but I wanted y'all to have a background on why a lot of my poetry will be focusing on the cheating and the pain but the healing as well. Thank you so for being so supportive of me before and I have no doubt you all will be just as supportive now.

Good bless each of you I love you all,

Love, m&m