Kelly2

To anyone insulted or offended by the way I speak of my mother in my chapters of "Chronicles of a Maid and Mary":

I discovered as a teenager that many people have wonderful, nurturing mothers--that one person in your life who is always on your side and who loves you unconditionally, as only a mother can. I did not.

I do what I do for my mother out of a sense of obligation. I feel sorry for her, exactly what I was brainwashed to feel as a child. Always the victim, she used me for sympathy, for somebody to listen to her. I sat at her feet while she told me her twisted version of situations and how people were always doing horrible things to her. I would cry and vehemently defend her. Now as an adult, I know that she had created everything herself and continues to do so. The "horrible things" are what she did to others, including myself, not what was done to her. I feel sorry for her because she has burned every bridge and every relationship she ever had besides me and my youngest sister. I am the only person she has in the world, at this time in her twilight years, and I just can't turn my back on her--even at the cost of my own mental health.

I am Cat: ((((((Kelly))))), I understand. If you've ever read anything I've written about my father... you'd know why. ;) I 'get' it. Though I have an amazing mother, my father certainly wasn't and I'm not sorry at all that he's dead. (((((((sending hugs)))))) Keep writing to get it out! Cat

October 7, 2016 at 12:31AM

mrsmajor: If you felt comfortable writing as you feel, why would it matter what people thought...We should be truthful about our lives, what good would it have been to lie...I think there is goodness in your heart, as you feel some empathy for here now, I wish you well, and send great big hugs!

October 7, 2016 at 12:46AM

nor84: My mother died when I was 9, so I don't remember her. I'd say she was competent, not affectionate. She didn't answer childish questions very well. My father, to whom I was born when he was 50, did a much better job. But we are who we are - No need to worship our parents or forgive their faults.

October 7, 2016 at 1:09AM

Linda Engel: I had mother issues , too. I took care of her last few years after she suffered a stroke. I got the closure I needed when she died and the bad memories are in my journals. I try my best to be a good mother to my child and my grand children. I do understand and writing is the best way to deal with it.

October 7, 2016 at 10:27AM

Mary Wakeford: There are those that are not cut out for parenthood. From what I've read, yours was one of 'those.' I love your honesty and had you not had the experiences that 'built' you given your childhood, all of us who know and read you, either here on FS or elsewhere, would not be blessed with your witty humor and down to earth style, and the hilarious 'look back' on a life well lived. You are a survivor, KellBell, and we love you just the way you write. Those that don't, can just "Git along, little Dogies, Whoopie Ti Yi Yo!"

October 7, 2016 at 6:09PM

ScarBundy: The truth hurts sometimes. You write what you feel and from true experiences. Nearly everyone knows (or should know) that true experiences aren't always pleasant. Sometimes there is no white horse, no magic beans, and no happily ever after. It doesn't mean it's not worth telling the story anyway. You keep writing! Dr. Seuss once said something along the lines of "say what you feel and be who you are, because those who matter don't mind and those who mind don't matter."

October 24, 2016 at 12:12PM