Don't wake the night...
A villanelle63 total reviews
Comment from Veenbee
Sorry, I don't have any sixes. Ok, I think I just learned from you how to put a poem together. My last entry, titled Vee was written over twenty years ago. Some commented and said it didn't have a rhythm, which I get. Honestly I didn't know what I was doing. Well, after reading yours and seeing that every line is eight syllables, you make it seem easy. How do you do it. Great job. Veenbee
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2020
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Sorry, I don't have any sixes. Ok, I think I just learned from you how to put a poem together. My last entry, titled Vee was written over twenty years ago. Some commented and said it didn't have a rhythm, which I get. Honestly I didn't know what I was doing. Well, after reading yours and seeing that every line is eight syllables, you make it seem easy. How do you do it. Great job. Veenbee
Comment Written 19-Sep-2020
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2020
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Thanks Vee, (If you ever need help, I?m happy to.) for these excellent comments and a great review, blessings Roy
Comment from Boogienights
This is a lovely rhyming poem, it flows along without effort and it asks the reader to examine what their intentions are and to ask themselves if what they are doing is the right thing. Thought provoking. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2020
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This is a lovely rhyming poem, it flows along without effort and it asks the reader to examine what their intentions are and to ask themselves if what they are doing is the right thing. Thought provoking. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 19-Sep-2020
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2020
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Thanks for these thoughtful comments and lovely review, blessings Roy
Comment from CrystieCookie999
This is a good poem that points out no matter how much humans try to hide their actions, that all will be revealed eventually. So we ought to be mindful of our thoughts and actions, or "a careless heart may court dismay." Good reasoning here.
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2020
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This is a good poem that points out no matter how much humans try to hide their actions, that all will be revealed eventually. So we ought to be mindful of our thoughts and actions, or "a careless heart may court dismay." Good reasoning here.
Comment Written 19-Sep-2020
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2020
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Thanks Crystie, for your wonderful comments, and review, blessings Roy
Comment from Katherine M. (k-11)
I really like most of what you write, but this calls to me particularly because of the repeating lines:
they say that crime will never pay,
what's sown in night is reaped by day.
Firstly it makes me think endlessly, who is 'they'?
And secondly it takes me back many years to when I lived in England. W used to say 'you reap as you sow.'
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2020
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I really like most of what you write, but this calls to me particularly because of the repeating lines:
they say that crime will never pay,
what's sown in night is reaped by day.
Firstly it makes me think endlessly, who is 'they'?
And secondly it takes me back many years to when I lived in England. W used to say 'you reap as you sow.'
Comment Written 19-Sep-2020
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2020
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I?ve heard the term quite a few times in my life Katherine Thanks again for your wonderful comments, and a super review, blessings Roy
Comment from Elizabeth Emerald
Surely sun can dazzle sight--surely such a stellar line can win your stars!
Sleeping dog's a thief's delight--witty! When "darkness shines"--fresh combo! (re crim--explain in footnote short for criminal, not typo of crime) Cheers. LIZ
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2020
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Surely sun can dazzle sight--surely such a stellar line can win your stars!
Sleeping dog's a thief's delight--witty! When "darkness shines"--fresh combo! (re crim--explain in footnote short for criminal, not typo of crime) Cheers. LIZ
Comment Written 19-Sep-2020
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2020
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Thanks Liz for your excellent comments, and review, blessings Roy
Comment from Teri7
Roy, This is a very well written Villanelle poem you have penned. You used very good descriptive words and very neat imagery from the art work you chose. Thanks for sharing. Blessings, Teri
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2020
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Roy, This is a very well written Villanelle poem you have penned. You used very good descriptive words and very neat imagery from the art work you chose. Thanks for sharing. Blessings, Teri
Comment Written 19-Sep-2020
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2020
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Thanks Teri, for these excellent comments, and review, blessings Roy
Comment from nomi338
Please do not be offended if I do not comment on a poems style, syllable count or some other fancy feature. I am a content first and foremost kind of reviewer. I respect the various forms, but do not spend a lot of time critiquing them. I am most concerned with, does the poem say something that is of interest to me, if it does not, I may well pass on reviewing it altogether. Your poem makes me remember that old saying, What is done in the dark will be revealed in the light. Good work.
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2020
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Please do not be offended if I do not comment on a poems style, syllable count or some other fancy feature. I am a content first and foremost kind of reviewer. I respect the various forms, but do not spend a lot of time critiquing them. I am most concerned with, does the poem say something that is of interest to me, if it does not, I may well pass on reviewing it altogether. Your poem makes me remember that old saying, What is done in the dark will be revealed in the light. Good work.
Comment Written 19-Sep-2020
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2020
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Thanks Bro, for your kind comments, and review, blessings Roy
Comment from Janice Canerdy
The world has become so fraught with evil that some people call wrong right and right wrong (Scriptures). some clearly know the difference but don't care. Your poem conveys a powerful message about the darkness that lucks in the human heart.
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2020
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The world has become so fraught with evil that some people call wrong right and right wrong (Scriptures). some clearly know the difference but don't care. Your poem conveys a powerful message about the darkness that lucks in the human heart.
Comment Written 19-Sep-2020
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2020
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Thanks Janice, for your kind comments, and an empathetic review, blessings Roy
Comment from Lucy de Welles
Interesting concept, the shining of darkness. Funny, I just got done editing my next chapter which contains a yacht and "there is nothing hidden that will not be revealed. There is nothing secret that will not come to the light." John calls himself the Unsecret-er.
We must be on the same wavelength today :)
Love the artwork on this one. The darkness and the light are both alike to thee...
Well done!
Lucy
Line 16: did you mean to use "crim"? It's old English. Different ....
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2020
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Interesting concept, the shining of darkness. Funny, I just got done editing my next chapter which contains a yacht and "there is nothing hidden that will not be revealed. There is nothing secret that will not come to the light." John calls himself the Unsecret-er.
We must be on the same wavelength today :)
Love the artwork on this one. The darkness and the light are both alike to thee...
Well done!
Lucy
Line 16: did you mean to use "crim"? It's old English. Different ....
Comment Written 19-Sep-2020
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2020
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It?s Luke 11:35, ?Make sure your light isn?t darkness? Lucy, that?s the motivating scripture. Thanks for these wonderful comments and review. Blessings Roy
Comment from joycetreasures
Great job on this poem Roy. Yes, even still today, things seem to happen in the dark of the night. Yet, I always believe that you will reap what you sow. I love your title and the imagery of the man in the dark. But, behind him is the lights. Great message.
Your second line from the bottom of your poem is missing a "y" in the first word. You have "the" and I think you want to say "they." Overall, lovely and exceptional poem. Happy future writing:-)
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2020
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Great job on this poem Roy. Yes, even still today, things seem to happen in the dark of the night. Yet, I always believe that you will reap what you sow. I love your title and the imagery of the man in the dark. But, behind him is the lights. Great message.
Your second line from the bottom of your poem is missing a "y" in the first word. You have "the" and I think you want to say "they." Overall, lovely and exceptional poem. Happy future writing:-)
Comment Written 19-Sep-2020
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2020
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Thanks for these marvellous comments, and a great review, blessings Roy
