O My God and Mother Nature!
Viewing comments for Chapter 11 "Spring"Appreciation of God and Mother Nature
157 total reviews
Comment from joyshri
Enjoyed the pithiness of the lines which convey so much. I appreciate your notes at the end.The alliteration flowing from word to word adds a lot to the imagery and music.Joyshri
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Enjoyed the pithiness of the lines which convey so much. I appreciate your notes at the end.The alliteration flowing from word to word adds a lot to the imagery and music.Joyshri
Comment Written 15-Jul-2006
Comment from Barbara-Anne
It amazes me how much punch can be packed into these small haikus. I love your wording for summer and rising hopes with the seasons change "let new sun rise hopes with heat."
Excellent!
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It amazes me how much punch can be packed into these small haikus. I love your wording for summer and rising hopes with the seasons change "let new sun rise hopes with heat."
Excellent!
Comment Written 14-Jul-2006
Comment from simon_morris
Great imagery. One question. Did you put the comma where you intended it? It seemed to make more sense with the comma after glow making it
Lights glow, lives grow dark.
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Great imagery. One question. Did you put the comma where you intended it? It seemed to make more sense with the comma after glow making it
Lights glow, lives grow dark.
Comment Written 13-Jul-2006
Comment from greeneyes
What a wonderful Haiku....this stayed true to form throughout--great job there!
Love the subject matter too!
really nice, strong imagery throughout....
thank you for sharing this well written poem
:)
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What a wonderful Haiku....this stayed true to form throughout--great job there!
Love the subject matter too!
really nice, strong imagery throughout....
thank you for sharing this well written poem
:)
Comment Written 13-Jul-2006
Comment from Nescher Pyscher
lights(light's) glow lives, go dark! (This line might be better punctuated as "light's glow live. go, dark!" or something similiar.)
Look out for opening these the same way.
O Spring.
O Rain.
Eventually it all starts to look like the same poem, and you lose your audience.
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lights(light's) glow lives, go dark! (This line might be better punctuated as "light's glow live. go, dark!" or something similiar.)
Look out for opening these the same way.
O Spring.
O Rain.
Eventually it all starts to look like the same poem, and you lose your audience.
Comment Written 13-Jul-2006
Comment from RaymondJohn
Ug a bee, ug a bee, that's all folks. A gem of brevity. Lotsa fun to read. Good motion, form and instruction. The textbook description. Best wishes. Ray.
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Ug a bee, ug a bee, that's all folks. A gem of brevity. Lotsa fun to read. Good motion, form and instruction. The textbook description. Best wishes. Ray.
Comment Written 12-Jul-2006
Comment from AK
Dear Alcreator,
Thankyou for writing so beautiful a haiku, woven with charming complexity into a
lovely poem of traditional structure. I am learning about Haiku and Senryu these days, so I find it all the more instructional.
I am stunned by this form that says so much, if one reads it as it is meant to be, in just seventeen syllables
warm regards,
ami
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Dear Alcreator,
Thankyou for writing so beautiful a haiku, woven with charming complexity into a
lovely poem of traditional structure. I am learning about Haiku and Senryu these days, so I find it all the more instructional.
I am stunned by this form that says so much, if one reads it as it is meant to be, in just seventeen syllables
warm regards,
ami
Comment Written 12-Jul-2006
Comment from VICTIMEYES
well at the beginning you seem to bid the spring goodbye fon now, but then when the end of the writting comes you seem to demand that it leave, always the creative one providing the hard way making me think very hard as always.
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well at the beginning you seem to bid the spring goodbye fon now, but then when the end of the writting comes you seem to demand that it leave, always the creative one providing the hard way making me think very hard as always.
Comment Written 12-Jul-2006
Comment from drivenbackward
Okay, got it on first read with this one, I think. Why 'go dark' at the end though? Was this a communication of balance in life OR something else? Enjoyed it.
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Okay, got it on first read with this one, I think. Why 'go dark' at the end though? Was this a communication of balance in life OR something else? Enjoyed it.
Comment Written 12-Jul-2006
Comment from National Scholar
bye spring, time is up
new sun brings hopes, intro heat
let lives glow, shake dark
Like a poetic clarion call at the instance of Spring going, leaving a mark of hope to uphold lives and remove all dark. Excellent message in brevity.
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bye spring, time is up
new sun brings hopes, intro heat
let lives glow, shake dark
Like a poetic clarion call at the instance of Spring going, leaving a mark of hope to uphold lives and remove all dark. Excellent message in brevity.
Comment Written 16-May-2006
