The Ballad of Silly Sam
No mask consequences23 total reviews
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
The Ballad of Silly Sam
by Chrissy710
Hello, Christine,
I'm so proud of you. You did an excellent job with your school ballad assignment. I know what a great student you are.
You are so right, I agree with you 100%. Making masks is a very loving and kind thing to do for your friends and family.
Cheers,
Gypsy
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2020
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The Ballad of Silly Sam
by Chrissy710
Hello, Christine,
I'm so proud of you. You did an excellent job with your school ballad assignment. I know what a great student you are.
You are so right, I agree with you 100%. Making masks is a very loving and kind thing to do for your friends and family.
Cheers,
Gypsy
Comment Written 03-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2020
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Hi Gypsy You are a love and have made my day (it is snowing and cold here in Ballarat and we all have to wear masks as Victoria has been declared a disaster state so our capital city Melbourne are in stage 4 lockdown no going out unless 4 reasons curfew etc and YET still idiots with diagnosed Corona Virus not being found home when police door knock .Our numbers in Victoria are around 400 a day with 10 to 13 deaths and STILL some stupid people cant get the message I cant understand them So it is now a mandatory $5000.00 fine if caught . Most of us are trying to do the right thing but we are paying for the minority who think they can just do what they want. And for the anti mask wearing 'Silly Sams' well still some of those too. Anyway enough of my rants Thanks for you generous review and lovely comments... Please stay safe and sending a big virtual hug xx Cheers Chris
Comment from lightink
I'm so glad to read something so timely and important!
Teaching through stories is probably one of the best ways of doing it.
And well, we get to hear all stages Silly Sam's relationship to mask wearing:
Self righteous denial, regret, and well...no more regret and no more Sam.
At the beginning I liked that you named pretty diverse set of acts that contribute to spreading the virus.
One of my favorite lines is:
"Sad tears ran down inside their mask.' - great image, and also it implies that the wore mask, or at least started to once Sam got sick.
Also, you did a terrific job shifting around the meaning of the mask (and keep finding great rhymes and near rhymes).
The only thing I have slight reservations about is:
"The hospital Doc sent him to
They put him in the ICU."
We can stretch grammar in poems, so it's fine, but it's a little tricky for me. I'd probably go with:
"The hospital doc sent/put him to
the dreaded Covid ICU'
or something like that...
It's a great poem and message!
Thank you for sharing!
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2020
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I'm so glad to read something so timely and important!
Teaching through stories is probably one of the best ways of doing it.
And well, we get to hear all stages Silly Sam's relationship to mask wearing:
Self righteous denial, regret, and well...no more regret and no more Sam.
At the beginning I liked that you named pretty diverse set of acts that contribute to spreading the virus.
One of my favorite lines is:
"Sad tears ran down inside their mask.' - great image, and also it implies that the wore mask, or at least started to once Sam got sick.
Also, you did a terrific job shifting around the meaning of the mask (and keep finding great rhymes and near rhymes).
The only thing I have slight reservations about is:
"The hospital Doc sent him to
They put him in the ICU."
We can stretch grammar in poems, so it's fine, but it's a little tricky for me. I'd probably go with:
"The hospital doc sent/put him to
the dreaded Covid ICU'
or something like that...
It's a great poem and message!
Thank you for sharing!
Comment Written 03-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2020
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Hi Lightink Thanks so much for reading and commenting on my Silly Sam and for your suggestio9n and yes I did struggle a bit with those two lines may have a rethink and change
I am gob-smacked that STILL people are defiying out Covid rules and not wearing masks or being home when they have Covid spreading it around our community Fines now here a $5000 on the spot for not being home if required to. Something has to work we are in a 6 week heavy lockdown here after our numbers rose around 400 to 600 a day (due mainly to community transmission
So yes this ballad is timely and I may send it to our local papers also . Anyway please stay safe and I do appreciate you review and helpful suggestions Cheers Chris
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Your welcome! Wow! That's a steep fine!
But sometimes people need a little extra motivation, I suppose! Stay safe!
Comment from elchupakabra
He really thought he was immune
But, soon a lesson he would learn.
(you lost the rhyme, 'But he'd have to learn his lesson soon' keeps the rhyme)
So, to the doctor's office (he) went
The hospital Doc sent him to (through works better here)
They put him in the ICU.
Sad tears ran down inside their mask(s).
There were parts that are challenging to read due to typos, or because the rhythm is a bit clunky, it needs a few edits but I still enjoyed it :) Good work and thanks for sharing. Later daze.
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2020
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He really thought he was immune
But, soon a lesson he would learn.
(you lost the rhyme, 'But he'd have to learn his lesson soon' keeps the rhyme)
So, to the doctor's office (he) went
The hospital Doc sent him to (through works better here)
They put him in the ICU.
Sad tears ran down inside their mask(s).
There were parts that are challenging to read due to typos, or because the rhythm is a bit clunky, it needs a few edits but I still enjoyed it :) Good work and thanks for sharing. Later daze.
Comment Written 03-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2020
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Hi daze Thanks very much for reading and suggestions I have revisited some lines and I think they read a bit better and have considered you suggestions . Sometime it is hard to get everything exacctly right however the meaning I hope was not lost on these spags
We are in serious lockdown here in Victoria after days of high number and idiots not doing the right think it beggars belief how some people can be so stupid in their arrogance so Silly Sams is alive and well however heavy fines to come seems to be the only way to get the message across.. Please stay safe and Cheers Chris
Comment from Justin Chopin
A very good warning in this piece Christine. Sam kind of reminds me of all of those flip flopping politicians who constantly change their minds about whether we should wear these masks or not. Liked how you showed the progression of how his bombastic nature eventually killed him. Well done.
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2020
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A very good warning in this piece Christine. Sam kind of reminds me of all of those flip flopping politicians who constantly change their minds about whether we should wear these masks or not. Liked how you showed the progression of how his bombastic nature eventually killed him. Well done.
Comment Written 02-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2020
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Hi Justin Thanks so much and the sad thing is that it is probably true in some cases and despite the rules and lockdown there are still Silly Sams among us.. However I think we maybe be getting better. Many are wearing masks and I am sewing them for my family and friends (least I can do) Stay safe Cheers Chris
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You're welcome.
Comment from Father Flaps
Hi Chrissy,
I really enjoyed your poem about the mistake of not staying safe. It's about 50/50 here in southern New Brunswick. We haven't had many cases through this whole thing. We've done really well, thanks to our government. But in places where there are a lot of cases, people need to be smart. In public, wear a mask!
I like how you use "mask" as your last word in almost every verse. Poor Sam thought he was invincible. And he wasn't. The virus was stronger.
We are living in crazy times, Chrissy. Let's hope they find a vaccine fighter ASAP. I want to get back to normality!
Thanks for sharing!
Cheers
Kimbob
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2020
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Hi Chrissy,
I really enjoyed your poem about the mistake of not staying safe. It's about 50/50 here in southern New Brunswick. We haven't had many cases through this whole thing. We've done really well, thanks to our government. But in places where there are a lot of cases, people need to be smart. In public, wear a mask!
I like how you use "mask" as your last word in almost every verse. Poor Sam thought he was invincible. And he wasn't. The virus was stronger.
We are living in crazy times, Chrissy. Let's hope they find a vaccine fighter ASAP. I want to get back to normality!
Thanks for sharing!
Cheers
Kimbob
Comment Written 02-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2020
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Hi Kimbob Thanks for your review and comments. maybe the message is getting across although still some out there who wont comply with wearing a mask or staying home when positive to Corona
Strange time we are living through lets hope we can beat it at some time and a safe vaccine is found Stay safe Cheers Chris
Comment from Raul1
I like how you structured this poem. Well written. It is a sad poem, but I liked it. Nice job. Excellent work! No grammatical errors. You expressed emotions in this poem. Thanks for sharing!
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2020
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I like how you structured this poem. Well written. It is a sad poem, but I liked it. Nice job. Excellent work! No grammatical errors. You expressed emotions in this poem. Thanks for sharing!
Comment Written 01-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 04-Aug-2020
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Hi Raul Thanks so much for your review I enjoyed writing this although wish I didn't have to have this subject but it is what it is and we all need to do the right thing. I should write another one about stupid people who cant seem to comply even now Hmmm Stay safe Cheers Chris
Comment from dragonpoet
Sadly a lot of people still refuse to wear masks and are getting sick too.
It is such an easy way to protect yourself and others.
In stanza seven 'the' should be the first word. It makes no sense to have to at the beginning and end. And in the eighth stanza it should be masks.
Keep writing and stay healthy.
dragonpoet
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2020
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Sadly a lot of people still refuse to wear masks and are getting sick too.
It is such an easy way to protect yourself and others.
In stanza seven 'the' should be the first word. It makes no sense to have to at the beginning and end. And in the eighth stanza it should be masks.
Keep writing and stay healthy.
dragonpoet
Comment Written 01-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2020
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Hi dragonpoet Thanks for your review and have changed the lines a bit Hopefully the message is what people take on board also. We are in a lockdown here so only 4 reasons to go out for the next 6 weeks and hopefully everyone stays safe and healthy. Cheers Chris
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No problem, Chris. We are a little freer than you seem to be. But are still not sure if anything is really safe to do yet.
Joan
Comment from Pam (respa)
-Good artwork and
presentation, Christine.
-It is good to see you,
and I hope you are doing well.
-I think numbers are climbing
in lots of places with summer
activities, and many people
not believing they need to
abide by the rules.
-Kudos to you for making masks,
and taking a poetry class, too!
-You wrote a very good ballad
that flows well and tells a good
story with good meter and rhyme.
-Take care and be well.
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2020
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-Good artwork and
presentation, Christine.
-It is good to see you,
and I hope you are doing well.
-I think numbers are climbing
in lots of places with summer
activities, and many people
not believing they need to
abide by the rules.
-Kudos to you for making masks,
and taking a poetry class, too!
-You wrote a very good ballad
that flows well and tells a good
story with good meter and rhyme.
-Take care and be well.
Comment Written 01-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2020
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Hi Pam Thanks so much sorry for delay in reply. We are now in a lockdown here so I wont be going out much except to work or groceries. It is also cold so I will stay inside and keep warm. Have changed a couple of words but message is still the same. Most people are doing the right thing bit some are still being silly and cant seem to get it. They put everyone a risk . You take care too and stay safe Cheers Chris.
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You are very welcome, Christine, and no problem with a delay. Thanks for sharing in your reply. Unfortunately, there are always some who don't get it.
Comment from nancy_e_davis
The meter is off in many places but the message is one everyone should listen to. This Virus is a serious danger and we need to heed the warning's we are receiving about being careful. The message here gets a six! WEAR A MASK! Only go out when it is necessary. PRAY!!! It could be the death of mankind. Nancy:)
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2020
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The meter is off in many places but the message is one everyone should listen to. This Virus is a serious danger and we need to heed the warning's we are receiving about being careful. The message here gets a six! WEAR A MASK! Only go out when it is necessary. PRAY!!! It could be the death of mankind. Nancy:)
Comment Written 01-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2020
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Hi Nancy Thanks for your review and sorry for delayed reply. I have changed it a bit so hopefully the meter is better every line should have 8 syllables and rhyme Yes the message is WEAR AMASK but we still have those who defy this request . We are currently in a lockdown here in Victoria and should not be out unless necessary so hopefully our numbers will decrease. I think most people are a little worried and try to do the right thing
still making masks also stay safe and thanks for your sixer Cheers Chris
Comment from HarryT
Love this poem and so true of stupid people who ignore science, not only causing a danger to themselves, but also don't care about putting others in harms way. Just a couple of little spags. See below:
So to the doctor's (he) office went. Insert he.
Sad tears ran down inside their mask(s). Insert s.
Keep writing.
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2020
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Love this poem and so true of stupid people who ignore science, not only causing a danger to themselves, but also don't care about putting others in harms way. Just a couple of little spags. See below:
So to the doctor's (he) office went. Insert he.
Sad tears ran down inside their mask(s). Insert s.
Keep writing.
Comment Written 01-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2020
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Hi Harry, Thanks for your review and sorry for late reply. Have fixed the spags I think But message still stands true. Our numbers are still high here so we are now in lockdown at least for the next 6 weeks and most people are doing the right thing but we pay the price for those stupid people who just don't seem to get it. Anyway stay safe and well And keep writing too Cheers Chris
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Hope things improve soon for you.
