Reviews from

Wilderness Redemption Road

Viewing comments for Chapter 13 "Call of the Wild"
Shenanigans on the frontier

20 total reviews 
Comment from To Write Is To Live
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I like the realistic dialogue, especially the workings of the black powder musket; my friends who have operated these firearms have shown me the involved process to load these firearms, and kudos to you for getting the procedure right. Also, when Janie fired the rifle, she was surprised, which is exactly what should happen when a marksman takes aim and slowly pulls back on the trigger, and not jerk it back suddenly.
Thank you for writing and sharing this chapter.

 Comment Written 30-Jul-2020


reply by the author on 07-Aug-2020
    Sorry for the late response. I appreciate you reading and reviewing my work.
Comment from Ignatius Albright
Excellent
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You have a very intriguing and seemingly complex storyline established here. I feel like I'm hooked already and am eager to go back and read the previous chapters!

Well done! Keep writing and Keep Safe,
Ignatius A

 Comment Written 30-Jul-2020


reply by the author on 07-Aug-2020
    Sorry for the late response. I appreciate you reading and reviewing my work.
Comment from country ranch writer
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Wating for more is your enjoyable story to seewhat will happen next on this adventure . Glad Jamie got her deer. She had a lucky shot.

 Comment Written 30-Jul-2020


reply by the author on 07-Aug-2020
    Sorry I?m so late responding. Thank you for the six star honor, I appreciate you taking the time to read and review my work.
reply by country ranch writer on 10-Aug-2020
    Glad you haven't given up on me
reply by country ranch writer on 10-Aug-2020
    Glad you haven't given up on me
Comment from lyenochka
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Glad to see you bringing your story back, Earl. Great storytelling! Reminds me of the adventure books I read as a kid. You even showed us how to use an old-time rifle. Now the eating of the deer liver sounds gross to me, especially considering parasites it might contain but I imagine if you know what you're doing, it is probably safe. These days, you'd probably have to watch for animal rights readers but perhaps they won't be reading about life on the frontier.

There's a typo in your description.

 Comment Written 30-Jul-2020


reply by the author on 07-Aug-2020
    Sorry for the late response. I appreciate you reading and reviewing my work.
Comment from Iza Deleanu
Excellent
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Wow, Little One is an awesome hunter now, and she was accepted in the clan. Thank you for sharing this ancient hunting ritual. Sometimes we need to take a pose and learn.

 Comment Written 30-Jul-2020


reply by the author on 07-Aug-2020
    Sorry for the late response. I appreciate you reading and reviewing my work.
Comment from Bobby Cunningham
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is the first of your story that I've read yet I'm really looking forward to chapter 14. I kept waiting for a big moment which I know will come next. The story held my attention throughout and leaves me longing for more. There are no grammatical errors or any typos, very well written.

 Comment Written 30-Jul-2020


reply by the author on 07-Aug-2020
    Sorry for the late response. I appreciate you reading and reviewing my work.
Comment from aryr
Excellent
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An interesting chapter, Earl. Janie has certainly learned a lot through traveling with the party and now she has learned about killing her first deer and the rights and responsibilities of the native nation involved. Meanwhile, McGraw is deeply wondering about Smythe, as he should. Very enjoyable chapter and reading. Blessings.

 Comment Written 30-Jul-2020


reply by the author on 07-Aug-2020
    Sorry for the late response. I appreciate you reading and reviewing my work.
Comment from Sally Law
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I'm glad to see you return to this, Earl. I enjoyed it so much. It reminds me of Dances With Wolves. You may get a little push back from this regarding the deer but that's the way it was. I appreciate the authenticity of your work. :)

One small improvement for your consideration.

"You should have killed him, Doolittle. (Period here) A man like that ...." End with a period, not a comma.

A fine continuation of your book, Earl. Hurry back! Sending you my best today as always,
Sally xo

 Comment Written 30-Jul-2020


reply by the author on 07-Aug-2020
    Sorry for the late response. I appreciate you reading and reviewing my work.
Comment from robyn corum
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Earl,

Yes, it has been a while since you posted on this story. Glad you are continuing it. This was certainly an interesting portion.

Some notes:
1.) "You got him! Good shot girl!(") Clancy shouted.

2.) Janie was still choking from the powder smoke, but still able to give a grin.
--> 'still' x2

3.) "This isn't half bad," (s)he thought.

4.) For McGraw, he couldn't see any reason for them to hang around the Shawnee town (and) Smythe had also been explicit,

Thanks a bunch. It's amazing the amount of research that goes into a historical novel. I always love this stuff! I'm sure you may know some of this stuff personally, if you're a hunter, yourself. The liver-eating part was pretty nasty - but realistic. Great job!


 Comment Written 30-Jul-2020


reply by the author on 09-Aug-2020
    I?m sorry it?s taken me so long to reply to your review. I appreciate you following along and hanging in there with me. Would you be ok with me using you In what would happen if you met other Fanstorians?
reply by robyn corum on 09-Aug-2020
    hahaha Sure -- I think?
Comment from Melodie Michelle
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Nicely put together and very well written!
EXCELLENT story!
The characters interact well together and the storyline is very creative;-)

Thank you sharing;-)
Many blessings to you and your family;-)

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 30-Jul-2020


reply by the author on 07-Aug-2020
    Sorry for the late response. I appreciate you reading and reviewing my work.
reply by Melodie Michelle on 07-Aug-2020
    ;-)