Night Life
Live for the now40 total reviews
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
Why would you think this wouldn't place in the contest? It's life, it's what couples do when they love each other. Living life to the fullest takes in many pleasures, this is just one of them. Well done and good luck in the contest. :)) Sandra xx
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2020
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Why would you think this wouldn't place in the contest? It's life, it's what couples do when they love each other. Living life to the fullest takes in many pleasures, this is just one of them. Well done and good luck in the contest. :)) Sandra xx
Comment Written 30-Jul-2020
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2020
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The FS contest voters 'whoever they are' have a history of dismissing adult or erotic content. Or basically anything with warning labels or behind the wall.
Thank you very much.
Comment from HarryT
Syllable count is correct. I like the line "Writhing between joy and pain" but one's night of passion doesn't in my mind make life full. Must go beyond. But that is just my opinion.
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2020
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Syllable count is correct. I like the line "Writhing between joy and pain" but one's night of passion doesn't in my mind make life full. Must go beyond. But that is just my opinion.
Comment Written 30-Jul-2020
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2020
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Thank you very much. I would agree with you. That alone does not. But, it helps. :)
Comment from DeboraDyess
Competition here is high, but I don't know why you think this isn't worthy of winning or placing. It's good! And the line - writhing between joy and pain -- so true!! Well done, beautiful presentation. Great tanka poem!
Blessings and best of luck in that contest!
Deb
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2020
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Competition here is high, but I don't know why you think this isn't worthy of winning or placing. It's good! And the line - writhing between joy and pain -- so true!! Well done, beautiful presentation. Great tanka poem!
Blessings and best of luck in that contest!
Deb
Comment Written 30-Jul-2020
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2020
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Thank you very much.
Comment from Mastery
Hi Lance. You must know better by now than to post something with a negative feeling involved. LOL Don't say you believe it will not win or place. There is always a spot for excellent writing. And, that is what this poem amounts to, my friend.
"Thrilling night's passion
Vital to romantic bliss"
Outstanding writing. (No sixes left or one would be yours for this piece. : ) Bob
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2020
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Hi Lance. You must know better by now than to post something with a negative feeling involved. LOL Don't say you believe it will not win or place. There is always a spot for excellent writing. And, that is what this poem amounts to, my friend.
"Thrilling night's passion
Vital to romantic bliss"
Outstanding writing. (No sixes left or one would be yours for this piece. : ) Bob
Comment Written 30-Jul-2020
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2020
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Thank you very much. You are right. I will remove that from the notes. But, we both know FS history on certain content. I'm glad readers enjoy it.
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You're a good man, Lance. : ) Bob
Comment from rjuselius
This is a passionate piece of poetry dear lancellot! I don't know why it could not win but on the other hand i have only little knowledge of tankas.
Anyhoo, Thank you for sharing!
Good luck!
Blessings and a humongous hug-it-out hug!
Rebekka x
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2020
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This is a passionate piece of poetry dear lancellot! I don't know why it could not win but on the other hand i have only little knowledge of tankas.
Anyhoo, Thank you for sharing!
Good luck!
Blessings and a humongous hug-it-out hug!
Rebekka x
Comment Written 30-Jul-2020
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2020
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Thank you very much.
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My pleasure entirely <3
Comment from Marjon van Bruggen
Why can't this tanka not win the contest? Because of the sexual context? It is, according to me, not obscene or disgusting. Maybe not for children's eyes, but I think in FanStory all members are adults.
It is well written, it is definitely a tanks, so...good luck!
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2020
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Why can't this tanka not win the contest? Because of the sexual context? It is, according to me, not obscene or disgusting. Maybe not for children's eyes, but I think in FanStory all members are adults.
It is well written, it is definitely a tanks, so...good luck!
Comment Written 30-Jul-2020
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2020
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Thank you very much.
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Welcome!
Comment from papa55mike
Those passionate feelings somewhere between joy and pain bring big smiles the next day. What a wonderfully written poem and sexy picture.
Good luck in the contest!
Have a great day and God bless.
mike
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2020
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Those passionate feelings somewhere between joy and pain bring big smiles the next day. What a wonderfully written poem and sexy picture.
Good luck in the contest!
Have a great day and God bless.
mike
Comment Written 30-Jul-2020
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2020
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Thank you very much.
Comment from The Death
You have chosen a nice theme for this one. Excellent word economy as you have utilized each syllable well. Fine use of S consonance. Nice presentation as well. Good luck!
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2020
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You have chosen a nice theme for this one. Excellent word economy as you have utilized each syllable well. Fine use of S consonance. Nice presentation as well. Good luck!
Comment Written 30-Jul-2020
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2020
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Thank you very much.
Comment from Ogden
It is difficult to envision how or why your passion could have been swept away in love, seemingly an oxymoronic description. (It sounds more like a one-night stand.)
Wishing you many more of whatever it was,
Ogden (Don)
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2020
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It is difficult to envision how or why your passion could have been swept away in love, seemingly an oxymoronic description. (It sounds more like a one-night stand.)
Wishing you many more of whatever it was,
Ogden (Don)
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 30-Jul-2020
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2020
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Ha, ha, really, Don. Think about it. Some of the most passionate acts have been with someone you love. And because of that love they've swept away all that built up passion, fatigue, lust, energy and left you completely drain and unable to move. And then you open your eyes and see a smile. There are no words, no guilt,no hunger, just bliss. When you're married you get that over and over again.
Thank you very much.
Comment from January L'Angelle
Why can't this win or place? I rather like it! I'm not so sure about the picture but I never judge based on the picture that someone uses. I rate things based on the poetry and this is well written and very romantic. I scrolled down to where I couldn't see the picture and just read the words. They are really good. Don't ever sell yourself short! It's a beautiful poem. Best of luck. -January L. :)
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2020
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Why can't this win or place? I rather like it! I'm not so sure about the picture but I never judge based on the picture that someone uses. I rate things based on the poetry and this is well written and very romantic. I scrolled down to where I couldn't see the picture and just read the words. They are really good. Don't ever sell yourself short! It's a beautiful poem. Best of luck. -January L. :)
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 30-Jul-2020
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2020
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Thank you very much. I know. Just history with committee over certain content. But who knows. Maybe things will change.
