I Surrender
Deep in thought......15 total reviews
Comment from Mrs. KT
Hello Harmony!
You have penned a very pleasing and creative two line poem,
The internal rhymes and end rhymes are technically correct, and the visual and emotive imagery are beautiful.
Just a thought: I might suggest a comma between "sleep, then surrender."
Thank you for sharing!
Best Wishes!
diane
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2020
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Hello Harmony!
You have penned a very pleasing and creative two line poem,
The internal rhymes and end rhymes are technically correct, and the visual and emotive imagery are beautiful.
Just a thought: I might suggest a comma between "sleep, then surrender."
Thank you for sharing!
Best Wishes!
diane
Comment Written 27-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2020
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Thank you so much for the excellent review and great comments.
Also thanks for the suggestion. Hope you had a great Sunday, Diane!
Comment from royowen
This is an excellent entry in this contest, a few that I have reviewed have left out the inner rhyme, which is most important. Beautifully written dear friend, I love the theme. Good luck, blessings, Roy
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2020
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This is an excellent entry in this contest, a few that I have reviewed have left out the inner rhyme, which is most important. Beautifully written dear friend, I love the theme. Good luck, blessings, Roy
Comment Written 27-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2020
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Thanks so much for the excellent review and your lovely comments.
Hope you and your family are having a great Sunday!.....Maria
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My pleasure Maria
Comment from Amanda Louise Davis
I like this poem, but not sure the internal rhyme works because they aren't in ythe same place. Sleep and deep rhyme but are in different places in the lines. Idk. I still liked it, though.
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2020
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I like this poem, but not sure the internal rhyme works because they aren't in ythe same place. Sleep and deep rhyme but are in different places in the lines. Idk. I still liked it, though.
Comment Written 27-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2020
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Thank you so much for the excellent review and your great comments. I will look into the internal rhyme and if it has to be in the same place - thank you. Hope you are having a great day!
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written two-line poem about the splendor if deep thought that sometimes lead us to surrender to sleep when it comes to take us away to Dreamland.
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2020
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A very well-written two-line poem about the splendor if deep thought that sometimes lead us to surrender to sleep when it comes to take us away to Dreamland.
Comment Written 27-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2020
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Thank you so much for the excellent review and your lovely
comments. Hope you are having a great Sunday!....Maria
Comment from Ogden
Thinking important things through carefully,
unquestionably is an excellent practice. Therefore, surrendering certainly should be given a great deal of consideration, so be sure to follow your good advice.
Ogden (Don)
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2020
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Thinking important things through carefully,
unquestionably is an excellent practice. Therefore, surrendering certainly should be given a great deal of consideration, so be sure to follow your good advice.
Ogden (Don)
Comment Written 27-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2020
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Thank you so much for the excellent review and your exceptional
comments. Hope you are having a great Sunday!
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You are most welcome, Harmony!
Don
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
I Surrender
by harmony13
Hello my friend
Beautiful entry for the Two Line Poem contest. You even managed to rhyme :) the presentation is very nice too. Good job.
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2020
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I Surrender
by harmony13
Hello my friend
Beautiful entry for the Two Line Poem contest. You even managed to rhyme :) the presentation is very nice too. Good job.
Comment Written 27-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2020
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Thank you so much for the excellent review and your lovely
comments. Hope you are having a great day!
Comment from Janice Canerdy
You have made excellent use of your twelve syllables in this lovely essence poem. It conveys a message about how glorious sleep can be when one's mindset beforehand is peaceful.
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2020
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You have made excellent use of your twelve syllables in this lovely essence poem. It conveys a message about how glorious sleep can be when one's mindset beforehand is peaceful.
Comment Written 27-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2020
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Thank you so much for the excellent review and your lovely
comments. Hope you had a great day!
Comment from Earthlover
This is simple but really stands out because of the captivating color of green along with the feeling one gets with those expressive words. It's a really nice two line poem for the contest.
Best wishes...
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2020
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This is simple but really stands out because of the captivating color of green along with the feeling one gets with those expressive words. It's a really nice two line poem for the contest.
Best wishes...
Comment Written 27-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2020
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Thank you so much for the excellent review and your lovely
comments. Hope you had a great day!
Comment from Joan E.
I relished your artwork selection and matching presentation. Your rhymes and use of alliteration are very effective. Best wishes in the Two-Line Poem contest- Joan
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2020
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I relished your artwork selection and matching presentation. Your rhymes and use of alliteration are very effective. Best wishes in the Two-Line Poem contest- Joan
Comment Written 26-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2020
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Thank you so much for the excellent review and your lovely
comments. Hope you had a great day!
Comment from Bobby Cunningham
Wow! This is the best entry we've read for this particular contest, even better than ours. The picture accompanying this poem is exquisite, really beautiful presentation. Best of luck in the contest. Have a wonderful day.
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2020
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Wow! This is the best entry we've read for this particular contest, even better than ours. The picture accompanying this poem is exquisite, really beautiful presentation. Best of luck in the contest. Have a wonderful day.
Comment Written 26-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2020
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Thank you so much for the excellent review and your lovely
comments. Hope you had a great day!
