Reviews from

O My God and Mother Nature!

Viewing comments for Chapter 7 "Summer"
Appreciation of God and Mother Nature

156 total reviews 
Comment from Sassybaby
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I like the visual in this haiku and how almost all of the senses are used. I really like the words and phrases. This is a simple haiku but the meaning is deep and there could be multiple meanings. Very nicely written.

 Comment Written 30-May-2006

Comment from greeneyes
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Nice, to the point Haiku you have written here
Your short poem conveyed a great message in such few lines--you stayed true to form and this was a joy to read & review
:)

 Comment Written 30-May-2006

Comment from proudgranny
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Great summer poem! Again I am inspired by your profound way of taking a few words and making them mean so much. Keep writing. I'm selfish and want to learn a lot by you.

 Comment Written 30-May-2006

Comment from Senyai
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

You must live near the desert, AllCreator, because you have captured how the sand soaks up all the water after a rain, and all cools down, changes everything as the wind cools the evening. Truly feels like a new beginning, even if it is at the end of a day.

all the best,
Foxey

 Comment Written 30-May-2006

Comment from lkdunny
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

A true haiku in structure of the 5-7-5 lay out. This piece was understandable. I'm just not sure it was one of my favorites, but the author delierved his point. It had a
beat- nix feel to it, reminded me of something you would hear in a coffee house in the sixties. I'm reviewing on the structure and content, not on my personal likes. Keep up the interesting work, I'm learning to digest it. lkdunny

 Comment Written 29-May-2006

Comment from Alchera
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This well-crafted and word-chosen haiku (5-7-5) highlights in every single word a natural moment starting from the Desert's desertic sands where rare showers fall after which the unbearable sunny coppered heat has been cooled down and all Nature breathes freshly better and life cheers up again, even for a while as Zepherus comes along hugging Summer cooly once more.

 Comment Written 29-May-2006

Comment from Silverfall
Average
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

As a whole, the poem itself was good: I liked the idea and the image conveyed. However, your poetry seems to lack a lyrical quality-- or at least, this haiku does. It was jumpy and rough to read, and as a result the entire quality is diminished as well. I'd try working on lyricism and see if you can make your haikus (and really just any poetry) flow better.

 Comment Written 29-May-2006

Comment from kurfess
Needs Improvement
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Sands after shower!
Cheer lives, flow fresh dear; past heat
Wind breeze cools summer.

I guess I just have a hard time making sense of some of your imagery. This is the 3rd poem I've reviewed. This is a haiku, 5-7-5 & about nature, but with so few syllables to get your message across, I would expect the message to be tighter. "wind breeze" is redundant, and I don't understand "flow fresh dear." They are segmented phrases that don't always add up.

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 29-May-2006

Comment from MikeSamford
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

A Haiku this one is! And a grand one at that, it speaks to me of a summer rain and all the cooling the water brings to me to cut that damn heat, I love this one it is too me your best.

 Comment Written 29-May-2006

Comment from Beatlegirl61
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

An excellent haiku and i think you've shown the power and choice of wordage here outweighs the quantitiy of those...Nice job and I enjoyed the read...can't wait for summer to come to 'full bloom'...

Take care, be well and peace!! Carol ::))

'beatle' qutoe today: "Sunrise doesn't last all morning..."
(All things must pass/George Harrison)

 Comment Written 29-May-2006