Gone
It is not right to cage anything.7 total reviews
Comment from Jeffrey L. Michaux
I like the message conveyed in this. When something has been caged freedom is all that they desire as you've so eloquently stated. I enjoyed reading this inspirational and well written work. Well done!
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2020
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I like the message conveyed in this. When something has been caged freedom is all that they desire as you've so eloquently stated. I enjoyed reading this inspirational and well written work. Well done!
Comment Written 04-Apr-2020
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2020
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Thanks, Jeff, for your read and comments.
Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear
You tried to catch and cage the bird but your conscience and moral sense do not permit you doing the immoral act because you know a bird wishes to explore the sky and live freely; well said.
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2020
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You tried to catch and cage the bird but your conscience and moral sense do not permit you doing the immoral act because you know a bird wishes to explore the sky and live freely; well said.
Comment Written 03-Apr-2020
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2020
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This poem is not only about a bird, it could be about a girl or any animal for that matter. Thanks for your read and review.
Comment from Puzzle
Maybe she she "wished" not wish? I don't know I just think the adding of the "Ed" makes it flow a little better. Other than that I love it. It's a great poem. Good job.
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2020
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Maybe she she "wished" not wish? I don't know I just think the adding of the "Ed" makes it flow a little better. Other than that I love it. It's a great poem. Good job.
Comment Written 03-Apr-2020
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2020
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Thanks for the catch. I have made the correction.
Comment from Y. M. Roger
A beautiful offering of a love that we just could not hold onto.... Thank you for sharing and best of luck at the polls!
she wish to --> she wishes to
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2020
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A beautiful offering of a love that we just could not hold onto.... Thank you for sharing and best of luck at the polls!
she wish to --> she wishes to
Comment Written 03-Apr-2020
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2020
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Thanks, I have corrected.
Tried to
cage her
couldn't hold he she flew away
she wish to explore the sky
never ever
to return
to me
-
Corrected again.
Thanks, I have corrected.
Tried to
cage her
couldn't hold he she flew away
she wish to explore the sky
never ever
to return
to me
-
Tried to
cage her
couldn't hold her she flew away
she wish to explore the sky
never ever
to return
to me
-
Updated. ;)
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
Your poem, Mystery Author, reads well with a good message. The picture is fitting. While your words create a great scenario, I believe you wrote with syllables in mind rather than actual number of words. Please check the rules I will return to see if revisions are made. Thanks for sharing. Respectfully, Jan
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2020
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Your poem, Mystery Author, reads well with a good message. The picture is fitting. While your words create a great scenario, I believe you wrote with syllables in mind rather than actual number of words. Please check the rules I will return to see if revisions are made. Thanks for sharing. Respectfully, Jan
Comment Written 03-Apr-2020
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2020
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Thanks I have corrected:
Tried to
cage her
couldn't hold he she flew away
she wish to explore the sky
never ever
to return
to me
-
Corrected again.
Tried to
cage her
couldn't hold her she flew away
she wish to explore the sky
never ever
to return
to me
-
wish--->wished
-
Changed from syllables to words.
Corrected version now on line.
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written Trinet about caging a bird is not a guarantee that he will stay when the cage is open. We cannot keep anything or anyone locked up against heir will.
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2020
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A very well-written Trinet about caging a bird is not a guarantee that he will stay when the cage is open. We cannot keep anything or anyone locked up against heir will.
Comment Written 03-Apr-2020
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2020
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I have corrected I had syllables and not words. See below:
Tried to
cage her
couldn't hold he she flew away
she wish to explore the sky
never ever
to return
to me
Comment from Kathleen S.
The picture you've chosen for your poem goes well with it. Never try to cage someone or thing, if it's meant to be it will be. "People love to soar and more freedom you give them and encouragement and truth, the more they love you for it."
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2020
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The picture you've chosen for your poem goes well with it. Never try to cage someone or thing, if it's meant to be it will be. "People love to soar and more freedom you give them and encouragement and truth, the more they love you for it."
Comment Written 03-Apr-2020
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2020
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Made a mistake. Had syllable count instead of word count. Corrected version below.
Tried to
cage her
couldn't hold he she flew away
she wish to explore the sky
never ever
to return
to me
