Oh Life!
Viewing comments for Chapter 4 "I Enjoy!"Experiences of living
139 total reviews
Comment from rivki1111
Hi its rivki and this was pretty cryptic and i was very thankful for the authors notes, which helped unlock this works secrets for me....
I think you have thought very deeply about this work and it shows...nicely desk top published and well written. I like the formatting and you have adhered to the discipline of the rictameter.
I think the words of the poem are speaking about all our worldly wisdom being brought to nothing before that unwelcome stranger death....and that all our needs are met...that's a give...probably totally out of the ball park but poetry does speak to different people differently...that's part of its magic.
Thanks for sharing this work with me, I would certainly recommend other lovers of poetry to review this work, cheers rivki
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Hi its rivki and this was pretty cryptic and i was very thankful for the authors notes, which helped unlock this works secrets for me....
I think you have thought very deeply about this work and it shows...nicely desk top published and well written. I like the formatting and you have adhered to the discipline of the rictameter.
I think the words of the poem are speaking about all our worldly wisdom being brought to nothing before that unwelcome stranger death....and that all our needs are met...that's a give...probably totally out of the ball park but poetry does speak to different people differently...that's part of its magic.
Thanks for sharing this work with me, I would certainly recommend other lovers of poetry to review this work, cheers rivki
Comment Written 01-Apr-2006
Comment from fastdigits
Try as I might, I could not make heads or tails of this writing. We all try, and so maybe it is me that is at fault. I gave you the fourstars for the effort.
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Try as I might, I could not make heads or tails of this writing. We all try, and so maybe it is me that is at fault. I gave you the fourstars for the effort.
Comment Written 01-Apr-2006
Comment from janine_i_dream
Your syllable count is wrong in several lines here - should be 2 4 6 8 10 8 6 4 2
giv en 2
what e'er I ask! 4
though diff er ent ly, I know 7
my Sci-Phil-Math thought goes wrong as 8
per the un ex plained pow er 'yond mort' 9
as nat ur al, un known, mys tic ord 9
an un seen eye keeps track 6
my needs, not ask 4
given 2
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Your syllable count is wrong in several lines here - should be 2 4 6 8 10 8 6 4 2
giv en 2
what e'er I ask! 4
though diff er ent ly, I know 7
my Sci-Phil-Math thought goes wrong as 8
per the un ex plained pow er 'yond mort' 9
as nat ur al, un known, mys tic ord 9
an un seen eye keeps track 6
my needs, not ask 4
given 2
Comment Written 01-Apr-2006
Comment from terryangelo
I always have to read your pieces five, six, seven and more times before the glimmer goes on and I say "ah, I get it or maybe not!" Then I go back for a few more readings. You are a real brain teaser!
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I always have to read your pieces five, six, seven and more times before the glimmer goes on and I say "ah, I get it or maybe not!" Then I go back for a few more readings. You are a real brain teaser!
Comment Written 01-Apr-2006
Comment from zootsuit42
I am really not quite sure what this poem is about, and this sequence of sentences is not really smooth. It's too disjointed. I just can't get anything out of it.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
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I am really not quite sure what this poem is about, and this sequence of sentences is not really smooth. It's too disjointed. I just can't get anything out of it.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 01-Apr-2006
Comment from Brantley88
Nice work Al. Thanks for the Authors Notes, they really helped me to get the full value of this work. Your form was very good. I would suggest that you always include your notes when you post this elsewhere. Nice one.
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Nice work Al. Thanks for the Authors Notes, they really helped me to get the full value of this work. Your form was very good. I would suggest that you always include your notes when you post this elsewhere. Nice one.
Comment Written 01-Apr-2006
Comment from Fangorian
Pretty good. Interesting concept. Just be certain that you send your notes with it. I couldn't make much sense of it until I read them.
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Pretty good. Interesting concept. Just be certain that you send your notes with it. I couldn't make much sense of it until I read them.
Comment Written 01-Apr-2006
Comment from kkholder
Hey! Very neat! This is less read and understood than it is just felt deep down. The last phrase is the answer... but then again you know that! :)
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Hey! Very neat! This is less read and understood than it is just felt deep down. The last phrase is the answer... but then again you know that! :)
Comment Written 01-Apr-2006
Comment from chelsmor
Fascinating write, with or without author notes. given
that somehow no matter what you need, you receive
no matter what you want to give, you can
that it is beyond mathematical explanation
or natural order
Intriguing write.
I enjoyed it.
Chelsmor
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
|
Fascinating write, with or without author notes. given
that somehow no matter what you need, you receive
no matter what you want to give, you can
that it is beyond mathematical explanation
or natural order
Intriguing write.
I enjoyed it.
Chelsmor
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 01-Apr-2006
