Remembering Yesterday
Viewing comments for Chapter 23 "New Job, New Problems"A widow's journey into her relationship with her
17 total reviews
Comment from alexisleech
This was such a good chapter because, not only was it well written, but much of it's content was so unexpected. For a man to fall in love with a pregnant woman is unusual, but you were obviously very attractive, and the friendship that had built up between you probably confused his feelings. You did the right thing going for dinner at his house, although I can imagine it was the dinner from hell!
Alexis xxx
reply by the author on 31-Dec-2020
  |
This was such a good chapter because, not only was it well written, but much of it's content was so unexpected. For a man to fall in love with a pregnant woman is unusual, but you were obviously very attractive, and the friendship that had built up between you probably confused his feelings. You did the right thing going for dinner at his house, although I can imagine it was the dinner from hell!
Alexis xxx
Comment Written 31-Dec-2020
reply by the author on 31-Dec-2020
-
Thank you for this review and six stars. It was unexpected for me as well and you describe what the dinner was like for me, as well as everyone else who was involved.
Beth
Comment from Rosemary Everson1
I'm so sorry you had to go through situations like this when you were the innocent bystander. I'm sure that taking an early leave of absence may have caused some people to get suspicious but what else could you do but pray.
reply by the author on 29-Jun-2020
 |
I'm so sorry you had to go through situations like this when you were the innocent bystander. I'm sure that taking an early leave of absence may have caused some people to get suspicious but what else could you do but pray.
Comment Written 29-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 29-Jun-2020
-
I notice you didn't comment on the one when we lost Susan. It was the saddest chapter of my book. I am glad you are willing to read all of this.
-
A loss of a child is devastating. How do you feel about 3 in 1 shots?
-
They may be safer now, but I think they gave them to early. My other children didn't get them until they were older. I personally knew the parents of two other babies who died from the shots during that same year.
Beth
Comment from barbara.wilkey
I would say Lee had some real issues and you weren't part of the problem. I am enjoying reading this.
Most most of the women were in the big office building or deep in the factory doing shift work. (Too many 'most')
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2020
|
I would say Lee had some real issues and you weren't part of the problem. I am enjoying reading this.
Most most of the women were in the big office building or deep in the factory doing shift work. (Too many 'most')
Comment Written 29-Mar-2020
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2020
-
Thank you Barbara, Lee had a lot of issued that i wasn't aware of for months. I think if I'd been less naive I might have picked up on something.
Beth
Comment from nancy_e_davis
Boy, You just never know what to expect from men do you. I know your husband was right saying men don't think like women. They don't. I have had several uncalled for events in my life as well. One guy left his wife and twin babies , came to Nevada and asked me to run away with him. What? I barely knew the guy but he said he was in love with me. LOL Good chapter. Well done explaining it all. Stay in stay safe, Beth. Nancy:)
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2020
|
Boy, You just never know what to expect from men do you. I know your husband was right saying men don't think like women. They don't. I have had several uncalled for events in my life as well. One guy left his wife and twin babies , came to Nevada and asked me to run away with him. What? I barely knew the guy but he said he was in love with me. LOL Good chapter. Well done explaining it all. Stay in stay safe, Beth. Nancy:)
Comment Written 29-Mar-2020
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2020
-
Thank you so much for your review and comments. I know I kept having these problems everywhere I worked. Apparently I could never seem to learn you simply can't be friendly without getting in trouble.
This wasn't the first or last guy I had problems with.
Beth
Comment from Mastery
Hi Beth. You have had an interesting life in the work force for sure. I can see where this will make a great novel on the bookshelves.
However, as I told you before, you need to learn to get past so much "telling" and begin "showing."
Granted, it is not an easy thing to learn, Beth, but once you have the hang of it...you will see the huge difference it makes in your writing. In order to "show" just be sure you are ALWAYS employing one or more of the five senses....touch, smell, sight, hearing and taste.
If you want help with "showing" please let me know. We can do it in private messaging if you like. Bless you my friend. Bob
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2020
|
Hi Beth. You have had an interesting life in the work force for sure. I can see where this will make a great novel on the bookshelves.
However, as I told you before, you need to learn to get past so much "telling" and begin "showing."
Granted, it is not an easy thing to learn, Beth, but once you have the hang of it...you will see the huge difference it makes in your writing. In order to "show" just be sure you are ALWAYS employing one or more of the five senses....touch, smell, sight, hearing and taste.
If you want help with "showing" please let me know. We can do it in private messaging if you like. Bless you my friend. Bob
Comment Written 29-Mar-2020
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2020
-
When I writing fiction I do show instead of tell. This whole story is mostly for my children and from the beginning I am simple talking aloud to my husband who has died and remembering our life together. I think a lot of showing would seem weird under those circumstances. I don't want it to sound like a novel. The main reason I'm even putting this on FanStory is because people are good about catching misspelling and other errors. If I ever finish this autobiography I will write something less personal. Thanks for reading this and offering to help Did you see the last chapter where I lost my first child?
Beth
-
Som sorry Beth. I tend to evaluate all writing the same. My error. LOL
No, I just got back on site today actually Beth. I will try to catch that chapter asap. :) Bob
Comment from thaities, Rebecca V.
This is one of those pins and needles chapters. This especially good to hear you are going to have another child.
You sure did have different experiences in your workforce life.
Can hardly wait for the next chapter.
reply by the author on 28-Mar-2020
|
This is one of those pins and needles chapters. This especially good to hear you are going to have another child.
You sure did have different experiences in your workforce life.
Can hardly wait for the next chapter.
Comment Written 28-Mar-2020
reply by the author on 28-Mar-2020
-
Thank you so much for the review and comments. I didn't have very good luck in the working world. There were many different kinds of problems but something was always happening. I did like the work I was doing on that job but it was possible to stay after what happened.
-
I certainly agree.
Comment from Spitfire
Great cliffhanger. My husband, like yours, didn't believe a man could have a platonic relationship with a woman and said I shouldn't invite any male into the apartment unless he were there.
Again, nice work with the historical background. I'm hoping this baby will be all right.
reply by the author on 28-Mar-2020
|
Great cliffhanger. My husband, like yours, didn't believe a man could have a platonic relationship with a woman and said I shouldn't invite any male into the apartment unless he were there.
Again, nice work with the historical background. I'm hoping this baby will be all right.
Comment Written 28-Mar-2020
reply by the author on 28-Mar-2020
-
Thank you for the review and comments. Several men on this site have said that too. I guess they know themselves. I don't quite understand it. As for that baby, yes she makes it. She's a nurse and last Friday got exposed to the virus but so far Okay. The hospital is making hr stay home two weeks.
-
So good to hear!
Comment from Brett Matthew West
-It is unusual a supervisor would insist an employee call them by their name
-P6- only an opinion, but breaks mornings and afternoons reads better as morning and afternoon breaks.
-The first part of P7 is a run-on sentence. Perhaps eliminate the word but and start a new sentence with Most of the women
-Also in P7 story teller show be storyteller
-In P20, Kennedy out spoken should be Kennedy was outspoken
-In the beginning of this chapter could tell Lee was up to no good. The chapter proved that correct.
-Story remains interesting.
reply by the author on 28-Mar-2020
|
-It is unusual a supervisor would insist an employee call them by their name
-P6- only an opinion, but breaks mornings and afternoons reads better as morning and afternoon breaks.
-The first part of P7 is a run-on sentence. Perhaps eliminate the word but and start a new sentence with Most of the women
-Also in P7 story teller show be storyteller
-In P20, Kennedy out spoken should be Kennedy was outspoken
-In the beginning of this chapter could tell Lee was up to no good. The chapter proved that correct.
-Story remains interesting.
Comment Written 28-Mar-2020
reply by the author on 28-Mar-2020
-
Thank you so much for the review and helpful suggestions. I guess I was pretty naive in those days. It didn't occur to me that he was anything other than nice older man. It wasn't ideal having to work so close with no one else in the building.
Beth
Comment from zanya
A real sense of the reality of daily life with its ups and downs and tragedies and unexpected events is portrayed in a convincing, forthright style - a most enjoyable read
reply by the author on 28-Mar-2020
|
A real sense of the reality of daily life with its ups and downs and tragedies and unexpected events is portrayed in a convincing, forthright style - a most enjoyable read
Comment Written 28-Mar-2020
reply by the author on 28-Mar-2020
-
Thank you so much for the six stars. I'm so glad you found it enjoyable. I appreciate your remarks.
Beth
Comment from Marjon van Bruggen
Oh, Beth! I do know what happened to you and this Lee. Something like that happened to me too. I was not married yet but engaged with a nice guy. I was 20 and he was 21. It was my second job. My boss was married and he was 40. There were three other girls working there. A telephone answering service. It was a nice job, interesting too. After about 6 months, my boss -John, he insisted- became too friendly to be comfortable. Little things, not something I could really accuse him of, or say something about. You know, laying a hand on my shoulder and keeping it there too long, or reading what I was writing and having his face very near to mine. His wife was working in the same office. I felt more than I saw her looking at me suspiciously. One day, she took me apart and said: be careful with my husband, he did "this" with all the other girls too. I quit the job. It was nice work, I earned a good salary, but working like that can become very uncomfortable!
You wrote it very well, it brought back all kinds of memories.
reply by the author on 28-Mar-2020
|
Oh, Beth! I do know what happened to you and this Lee. Something like that happened to me too. I was not married yet but engaged with a nice guy. I was 20 and he was 21. It was my second job. My boss was married and he was 40. There were three other girls working there. A telephone answering service. It was a nice job, interesting too. After about 6 months, my boss -John, he insisted- became too friendly to be comfortable. Little things, not something I could really accuse him of, or say something about. You know, laying a hand on my shoulder and keeping it there too long, or reading what I was writing and having his face very near to mine. His wife was working in the same office. I felt more than I saw her looking at me suspiciously. One day, she took me apart and said: be careful with my husband, he did "this" with all the other girls too. I quit the job. It was nice work, I earned a good salary, but working like that can become very uncomfortable!
You wrote it very well, it brought back all kinds of memories.
Comment Written 28-Mar-2020
reply by the author on 28-Mar-2020
-
This sort of thing happened to me more than once. I could never figure our what I did to bring it on. On another job I will have a boss just like the one you are describing. His wife was working there too. I think they can't get away with as much now as they once did. Than for the review and comments. I'll bet a lot of women went through this.
Beth
-
Yeah...sigh.
