Reviews from

The Enigma

A 15 syllable poem

9 total reviews 
Comment from Mark D. R.
Excellent
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Diana,

This is a very romantic verse you shared with us. The artwork and clip just add to its overall presentation.

Like your contrast between close and far away for their relationship.

Since you added a period at the end, consider capitalizing 'we.' Otherwise IMHO, the period becomes unnecessary.

Mark

 Comment Written 20-Feb-2020


reply by the author on 20-Feb-2020
    Ok, thanks for the suggestion as I used a comma, so i wasn't sure! appreciate your stars and helpful feedback! xoxo
Comment from Drew Delaney
Excellent
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What a gorgeous picture you've added. The tone of the poem seems depressing in a sense. Our choice of whom we love sometimes bring us more heartache than it's worth. This felt deep.
Drew xx

 Comment Written 20-Feb-2020


reply by the author on 20-Feb-2020
    Thank you, your stars and feedback is most appreciated :) xoxo
Comment from Teri7
Excellent
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This is a very nice and well written 15 syllable poem you have penned. You used very good descriptive words with very nice imagery. Very nice music that went well with your words. I enjoyed reading and reviewing this. Love and blessings, Teri

 Comment Written 20-Feb-2020


reply by the author on 20-Feb-2020
    Thank you Teri, your stars and encouraging feedback are most appreciated! xoxo
Comment from Ricky1024
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

"The Enigma"
Is a 15 Syllable Poem Contest Entry rich in Theme and Imagery.
It read well and flowed well with no Grammar y.
...
Complete Synopsis:
The Adjective and Objective Contents were both Excellent and Exceptional while Descriptive Measures aligned Perfectly.
...
Thanks and good luck with this.
Doctor Ricky 1024

 Comment Written 20-Feb-2020


reply by the author on 20-Feb-2020
    Thanks Ricky, this was a tough one for me. Sadly, i got a 2 star initially from a "new member", so i revamped it a bit. My first "2" ever! Ugh LOL! appreciate your supportive review! xoxo
Comment from Rosemary Everson1
Excellent
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This poem says much in just a few words. You are telling what love is and how distant it can become if you don't communicate. Your image is breathtaking.

 Comment Written 20-Feb-2020


reply by the author on 20-Feb-2020
    Thank you so much! appreciate you could get the meaning of this! :) xoxoxo
Comment from Bicpen
Good
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It is to myopic with a twist or even a mere second thought it could prevail in a champion of the sport but unfortunately it is reduced to mere face value and is quite a down grade not releasing the full potential of the first initial two lines with a poor conclusion and poor imagination. The syllable count is correct and though difficult at times to consume such wisdom in such short and announcement it can be done just needs to be clearly thought through and delivered in a good and wholesome charm. This one is a worthy winner of any competition.

 Comment Written 20-Feb-2020


reply by the author on 20-Feb-2020
    Good morning! I have revamped this a bit. I guess I wasn?t in my most profound writing place last night lol! Thanks for reviewing! xoxo
reply by Bicpen on 20-Feb-2020
    anytime ...
Comment from Miss Cookie Atkinson
Excellent
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The artwork you choose is magical. It captured my attention as well as you words from the start. That is one of my favorite songs by prince. It the true meaning of your poem for sure.Thanks for sharing.
Cookie

 Comment Written 20-Feb-2020


reply by the author on 20-Feb-2020
    Thank you! Appreciate your stars and precious feedback! xoxo
reply by Miss Cookie Atkinson on 20-Feb-2020
    My pleasure, have a nice day.
    Cookie
Comment from lyenochka
Excellent
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I think I understand what you're saying - perhaps it's because humans have such varying moods and even with our loved ones, we can feel very close or very far. Interesting music, too. Best wishes in the contest!

 Comment Written 19-Feb-2020


reply by the author on 20-Feb-2020
    The picture shows a couple close but overplayed with separation. It was hard to interpret with the right words. Thank you for your stars and feedback! xoxo
Comment from JP Writer
Needs Improvement
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I'm sorry not to feel inspired to assign this more stars, but it just doesn't work for me. I understand the limitations of a 15-word poetry prompt, but for me to buy into your premise that the closer we move toward love the farther we become, I need some reason. What keeps them apart as they draw closer: Egos? The stress of daily life? Something else? Also, consider using stronger verbs than "move" and "become." Vibrant verbs can do a lot of heavy lifting with very few syllables!

 Comment Written 19-Feb-2020


reply by the author on 19-Feb-2020
    Thank you, I sincerely appreciate your point of view. I will look this over and see how I could improve it! it was actual meant to express the picture with the double exposure of close and far. xoxo
reply by JP Writer on 19-Feb-2020
    I wish I could assign you six stars for so graciously receiving my critique, which must sting. But your attitude and willingness to rethink your piece will serve you well as your writing evolves. That's worked for me, especially during my decades as a journalist with very tough editors, most of whom were not gentle, but did teach me valuable tools and lessons. Write on!
reply by the author on 19-Feb-2020
    Believe me, I totally understood what you meant and no sting! :) I think it is much better now and describes the emotions in the picture better! Humbly appreciated!
reply by JP Writer on 19-Feb-2020
    Yes, much better! Not quite profound, but certainly better. Keep writing!!!
reply by the author on 19-Feb-2020
    LoL! Thank you! If you have a chance, you may like to read some others I have done which are much more profound. I?ve done 88 poems just since the year started, so I guess being profound Is a little lacking tonight! :). xoxo
reply by JP Writer on 19-Feb-2020
    I will certainly check out more of your work... it's late tonight, but I'm making a note to do so tomorrow. I'm impressed that you've posted so many poems. And also, I'm truly honored you have become a follower!
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2020
    Thank you. I appreciate! xoxo