Poor Peter
He's so forlorn with no lawn8 total reviews
Comment from robyn corum
Jen,
hahahaha Okay, okay - yeah, it's a little silly, but I like it. It's just the right amount of silly and quirky and I am the queen of quirky. haha
Nice job. Thanks for the smile and good luck!
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2020
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Jen,
hahahaha Okay, okay - yeah, it's a little silly, but I like it. It's just the right amount of silly and quirky and I am the queen of quirky. haha
Nice job. Thanks for the smile and good luck!
Comment Written 17-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2020
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Thanks for the great review Robyn. Cheers. Jen x
Comment from Jeffrey L. Michaux
I wouldn't be to happy about that after I've paid for seed and threw it out. I would be thinking about running them off although, they'd just come right back. Thanks for sharing this well written work. Well done!
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2020
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I wouldn't be to happy about that after I've paid for seed and threw it out. I would be thinking about running them off although, they'd just come right back. Thanks for sharing this well written work. Well done!
Comment Written 16-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2020
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Tnanks Jeffrey
Comment from Sharon Haiste
I think this is a good entry for the 5-7-5 Bye Bye Blackbird writing prompt.
This short verse tells a good story about the seed stealing birds.
Well done and I wish you luck with the contest.
Sharon
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2020
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I think this is a good entry for the 5-7-5 Bye Bye Blackbird writing prompt.
This short verse tells a good story about the seed stealing birds.
Well done and I wish you luck with the contest.
Sharon
Comment Written 16-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2020
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Thanks Sharon
Comment from moongirlwriter
Yes, that is the way of Mother Nature. . .my sister does that with the deer that come to visit her garden, she now grows her garden in pots on the deck, close to the house. Best of luck to you with this writing, it made me smile and gave me a chuckle.
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2020
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Yes, that is the way of Mother Nature. . .my sister does that with the deer that come to visit her garden, she now grows her garden in pots on the deck, close to the house. Best of luck to you with this writing, it made me smile and gave me a chuckle.
Comment Written 15-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2020
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Thanks a lot.
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:)
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:)
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Hello, my friend,
Good job with the 5/7/5 bye bye blackbird contest. Your syllable count is right. The poem is about birds. Good luck in the contest.
Gypsy
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2020
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Hello, my friend,
Good job with the 5/7/5 bye bye blackbird contest. Your syllable count is right. The poem is about birds. Good luck in the contest.
Gypsy
Comment Written 15-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2020
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Thanks.
Comment from Mark D. R.
You created a terrific play on words for your concluding line. Your selected FanArt helps to reinforce your poem. I am a big fan of using FanArtists whenever I post.
Good luck in this contest.
P.S. Since you used "forlorn" in your subtitle, consider editing to 'for-lawn' without caps.
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2020
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You created a terrific play on words for your concluding line. Your selected FanArt helps to reinforce your poem. I am a big fan of using FanArtists whenever I post.
Good luck in this contest.
P.S. Since you used "forlorn" in your subtitle, consider editing to 'for-lawn' without caps.
Comment Written 15-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2020
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Thanks for the review and the helpful suggestion. I've changed it.
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Pleased you made the change, but consider bracketing those words with single quotes. Methinks your intended pun will then be reinforced even more (-:
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Thanks
Comment from RodG
I remember being a Peter, hoping I could get a lawn to grow only to be frustrated by scads of greedy birds. Good use of alliteration in line one and your play-on-words in line three is delightful. Rod
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2020
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I remember being a Peter, hoping I could get a lawn to grow only to be frustrated by scads of greedy birds. Good use of alliteration in line one and your play-on-words in line three is delightful. Rod
Comment Written 15-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2020
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Many thanks Rid
Comment from ImaginosBuzzardoDesdinova
A lovely poem ended with a wonderful pun. Some people might groan, but sometimes a pun makes a lovely ending. So many birds love seeds. Especially grass seeds. It's a wonder anyone has a lawn at all.
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2020
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A lovely poem ended with a wonderful pun. Some people might groan, but sometimes a pun makes a lovely ending. So many birds love seeds. Especially grass seeds. It's a wonder anyone has a lawn at all.
Comment Written 15-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2020
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Many thanks fir the review
