Hazy Mists
Free Verse31 total reviews
Comment from Pantygynt
I liked this because its imagery is so unusual. The short lines work really well with only one line of six syllables and all the others five or under.
The imagery of dancing with the pebbles is really good.
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2020
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I liked this because its imagery is so unusual. The short lines work really well with only one line of six syllables and all the others five or under.
The imagery of dancing with the pebbles is really good.
Comment Written 11-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2020
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I appreciate your take on this verse, Jim. My goal is to write more FV and try to use some of the tools you taught us... Thanks so much... Hugs!!
Melissa
Comment from June Sargent
Sad yet beautiful piece that captures the longing for a loved one gone missing. The image of dancing alone by the river is touching and powerful. Great free verse!
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2020
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Sad yet beautiful piece that captures the longing for a loved one gone missing. The image of dancing alone by the river is touching and powerful. Great free verse!
Comment Written 11-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2020
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Hello June... thank you. How did your surgery go? Hope you are ok.
Melissa
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Testing at home now. Working with physical therapist- says I?m healing well. Just tired and a little loopy! Thanks for asking!
Comment from Frank Jauregui
The image you chose to pair with you poem really works well, in setting the mood for the reader. One can imagine the sounds coming up from the river and reminding you a past like love.
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2020
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The image you chose to pair with you poem really works well, in setting the mood for the reader. One can imagine the sounds coming up from the river and reminding you a past like love.
Comment Written 11-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2020
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Thank you very much Frank!!
Melissa
Comment from Drew Delaney
and dance wtih Typo with
This rings of sadness of losing someone and now being alone. The pic you chose is pretty and I can imagine dancing alongside the bank amongst the pebbles.
Very creative!
Drew
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2020
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and dance wtih Typo with
This rings of sadness of losing someone and now being alone. The pic you chose is pretty and I can imagine dancing alongside the bank amongst the pebbles.
Very creative!
Drew
Comment Written 11-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2020
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Thank you very much... I will look at the typo. :)
Melissa
Comment from poetessmom
I feel I'm in a dream with this poem. Nostalgia. I love giving life to the pebbles as they crowd to the edge. Though they're eager to dance and hear, they cannot. Their eagerness makes up for it. And then you draw out what's needed for you to dance.
Missing the one who has arms and can carry that tune, you still resurrect them from within as the pebbles' eagerness...handicapped but resourceful. This is a "less is more" poem. Beautiful.
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2020
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I feel I'm in a dream with this poem. Nostalgia. I love giving life to the pebbles as they crowd to the edge. Though they're eager to dance and hear, they cannot. Their eagerness makes up for it. And then you draw out what's needed for you to dance.
Missing the one who has arms and can carry that tune, you still resurrect them from within as the pebbles' eagerness...handicapped but resourceful. This is a "less is more" poem. Beautiful.
Comment Written 11-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2020
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Thank you very much for your lovely review.
Melissa
Comment from papa55mike
What a wonderfully written poem and I love the picture! Please check the fourth line and fix the "with". Best of luck with your writing!
Have a great day and God bless.
mike
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2020
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What a wonderfully written poem and I love the picture! Please check the fourth line and fix the "with". Best of luck with your writing!
Have a great day and God bless.
mike
Comment Written 11-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2020
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Hi Pappa Mike. Thanks so very much for the lovely review.
Melissa
Comment from Mrs. KT
Hello, Melissa!
What a moving and lyrical free verse offering. The musicality of the setting coupled with the free-flowing words is well-crafted. I enjoy the visual images your poem creates as well as the emotive - albeit the concluding stanza is incredibly sad...
Thank you for sharing!
diane
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2020
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Hello, Melissa!
What a moving and lyrical free verse offering. The musicality of the setting coupled with the free-flowing words is well-crafted. I enjoy the visual images your poem creates as well as the emotive - albeit the concluding stanza is incredibly sad...
Thank you for sharing!
diane
Comment Written 11-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2020
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Hi Diane. I am still trying to practice and master the FV form. I need to learn so many different techniques.... I must practice, practice. Maybe next time it will be happier. ~ let us hope! Thank you.
Melissa
Comment from Bill Pinder
Melissa, great job with this free verse that starts with a calm scene in nature and progresses to the idea of missing someone. Good creativity shared in this writing. Bill
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2020
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Melissa, great job with this free verse that starts with a calm scene in nature and progresses to the idea of missing someone. Good creativity shared in this writing. Bill
Comment Written 11-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2020
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Hey Bill. Thanks so much. I am still trying to grasp FV... practice, practice!!
Melissa
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Melissa, please check out some of my latest free verse and let me know what you think. Bill
Comment from royowen
I don't think I've every written a sad romance, but I'm not terribly imaginative. But I respond to sad stories or poems, (it's the Welsh nature in me I'm guessing) beautifully written Melissa, a great free verse, blessings, Roy
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2020
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I don't think I've every written a sad romance, but I'm not terribly imaginative. But I respond to sad stories or poems, (it's the Welsh nature in me I'm guessing) beautifully written Melissa, a great free verse, blessings, Roy
Comment Written 11-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2020
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Thanks so much Roy. I am practicing FV form... I need to learn to use different devices and tones... a work in progress. Thanks again.
Melissa
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Well done
Comment from Y. M. Roger
You're really getting a handle on these free verses, Melissa -- this one is so relatable and not only whispers reminiscing but also of Spring when we enjoy these 'stream dances'... :) Thanx for sharing your vision of action and emotions this morning! ;)
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2020
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You're really getting a handle on these free verses, Melissa -- this one is so relatable and not only whispers reminiscing but also of Spring when we enjoy these 'stream dances'... :) Thanx for sharing your vision of action and emotions this morning! ;)
Comment Written 11-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2020
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Thank you Yvette. I need to practice the FV form. I do not have it down yet... still trying. Thanks again!!
Melissa
