I /We / One
Joining Nonets25 total reviews
Comment from Teri7
This is very well written joining nonet poems you have penned. You used very good descriptive words and very lovely imagery. I love that shade of blue. I enjoyed reading and reviewing this.
Please check this one thing:
nieghbours
neighbors
May God bless you! Teri
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2020
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This is very well written joining nonet poems you have penned. You used very good descriptive words and very lovely imagery. I love that shade of blue. I enjoyed reading and reviewing this.
Please check this one thing:
nieghbours
neighbors
May God bless you! Teri
Comment Written 11-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2020
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Thank you Teri7, I have changed ie to ei but believe "ours" is correct here down under, signifying our next door.... I did add to authors notes, much appreciated****kahpot
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you are so welcome my friend. May God bless you! Teri
Comment from Y. M. Roger
What an awesome offering, sir -- you must have really worked on this one a while.... beautiful!! :) Love the I to we transition from top of the hour glass to bottom resulting in a 'mission' for the reader in parting! ; ) :) Thanx for sharing this evening, my friend!! ;) Yvette
nieghbours --> neighbors
break walls mend --> break, walls mend [know you're probably trying to avoid commas in there....]
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2020
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What an awesome offering, sir -- you must have really worked on this one a while.... beautiful!! :) Love the I to we transition from top of the hour glass to bottom resulting in a 'mission' for the reader in parting! ; ) :) Thanx for sharing this evening, my friend!! ;) Yvette
nieghbours --> neighbors
break walls mend --> break, walls mend [know you're probably trying to avoid commas in there....]
Comment Written 11-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2020
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Thank you very much, I have changed the ie to ei though here down under I believe "ours" is correct meaning our next door...., as always your comments are very much appreciated, I did add a authors note to hope it helps****kahpot
Comment from Natalie Goodwin
I like the message of a world united in peace. I also liked how the poem went from working alone to working together in order to unite as one. The way you designed the poem in the style of an hourglass is also interesting.
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2020
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I like the message of a world united in peace. I also liked how the poem went from working alone to working together in order to unite as one. The way you designed the poem in the style of an hourglass is also interesting.
Comment Written 11-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2020
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Thank you very much, yes it was interesting to write, much appreciated****kahpot
Comment from Drew Delaney
What an encouraging poem, kahpot. If only, we could!
This writing makes me feel like getting more involved, more united, more neighbourly. I think you have achieved what you set out to do.
Drew
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reply by the author on 12-Feb-2020
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What an encouraging poem, kahpot. If only, we could!
This writing makes me feel like getting more involved, more united, more neighbourly. I think you have achieved what you set out to do.
Drew
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 11-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2020
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Thank you for your lovely review and comments, much appreciated****kahpot
Comment from susand3022
Hi Kahpot, your message is clear in this Double Nonet. It's well written but for a couple of little glitches. Your first line is only 8 syllables and should be 9... oops! Also, 'we communicate' this line should be 4 syllables and it's 5... oops again!
Aside from those two little things, I really like this poem. I like the message a lot. :)
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2020
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Hi Kahpot, your message is clear in this Double Nonet. It's well written but for a couple of little glitches. Your first line is only 8 syllables and should be 9... oops! Also, 'we communicate' this line should be 4 syllables and it's 5... oops again!
Aside from those two little things, I really like this poem. I like the message a lot. :)
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 11-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2020
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Many, Many thanks, I thought I checked but me being me??, I do appreciate all your help and especially your encouragement****kahpot
