Twenty ways to die
Viewing comments for Chapter 1 "Twenty ways to die"Is about twenty ways to die stupidly
7 total reviews
Comment from BethShelby
Nice. I like your story. You made you character Charlie come alive with his amusing dialect. I saw that contest but I didn't realize you could turn it into a book. I didn't read the rules. I'll check in to see how the next one dies.
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2020
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Nice. I like your story. You made you character Charlie come alive with his amusing dialect. I saw that contest but I didn't realize you could turn it into a book. I didn't read the rules. I'll check in to see how the next one dies.
Comment Written 05-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2020
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Thank you so much for your review and beautiful stars.
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You are welcome.
Comment from BethShelby
Nice. I like your story. You made you character Charlie come alive with his amusing dialect. I saw that contest but I didn't realize you could turn it into a book. I didn't read the rules. I'll check in to see how the next one dies.
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2020
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Nice. I like your story. You made you character Charlie come alive with his amusing dialect. I saw that contest but I didn't realize you could turn it into a book. I didn't read the rules. I'll check in to see how the next one dies.
Comment Written 05-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2020
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Thank you so much Beth:)
Comment from Mistydawn
That's a big bite in the behind. Escape one horrid fate only to die of pneumonia. Especially after all of the trouble that he went through to escape. Your chapter is very well-written, interesting, believable. I look forward to reading the next one.
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2020
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That's a big bite in the behind. Escape one horrid fate only to die of pneumonia. Especially after all of the trouble that he went through to escape. Your chapter is very well-written, interesting, believable. I look forward to reading the next one.
Comment Written 05-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2020
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Thank you so much Misty:)
Comment from Ricky1024
"20 Days to day and idiot"
Is a Twenty Days to Die contest entry.
Rich in Theme and Imagery.
It read well and Flowed well with no Grammar Issues.
....
Complete Synopsis:
The Adjective and Objective Contents were both Excellent and Exceptional while Descriptive Measures aligned Perfectly!
And, good luck with this.
Doctor Ricky 1024
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2020
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"20 Days to day and idiot"
Is a Twenty Days to Die contest entry.
Rich in Theme and Imagery.
It read well and Flowed well with no Grammar Issues.
....
Complete Synopsis:
The Adjective and Objective Contents were both Excellent and Exceptional while Descriptive Measures aligned Perfectly!
And, good luck with this.
Doctor Ricky 1024
Comment Written 03-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2020
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Thank you Mr. Ricky
Comment from padumachitta
Hello
This was a catchy story. The fact that you used Polizei made me smile. I live in Germany.
Ah I found quite a bit of SPAG and think it might be on purpose... it being the POV of a refugee who doesn't speak the language well.
If so let me know and I will upgrade the stars.
If they are mistakes let me know, I will point them out. You change them, I upgrade the review.
Ok?
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2020
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Hello
This was a catchy story. The fact that you used Polizei made me smile. I live in Germany.
Ah I found quite a bit of SPAG and think it might be on purpose... it being the POV of a refugee who doesn't speak the language well.
If so let me know and I will upgrade the stars.
If they are mistakes let me know, I will point them out. You change them, I upgrade the review.
Ok?
Comment Written 03-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2020
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Hello and thank you for the review:) yes please to your offer, point the mistakes, but you don't need to upgrade the review:) Thank you so much for your precious help in correcting the grammar errors.
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Hi
Okay .... but you know if you made him speak with broken English and fixed the rest... it would give him more character..
Just a thought, because he is quite the character!
Communist curtain
I would be caught
immediately caught
I swam for it
I crossed
just ran
that escaped.
But really consider giving his voice, when he speaks, an accent...
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So what should I do? This is my broken English 🙃I know I shouldn't write in English, but I can't stop this impulse if just writing
Comment from May 1
I love the way you described Germany, it makes it so easy to imagine the situation. Yes, saying that something is for your safety rarely means that. Great ending to the story, it sure would sound strange to anyone that one has managed to escape from communism only to die of pneumonia.
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2020
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I love the way you described Germany, it makes it so easy to imagine the situation. Yes, saying that something is for your safety rarely means that. Great ending to the story, it sure would sound strange to anyone that one has managed to escape from communism only to die of pneumonia.
Comment Written 03-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2020
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Thank you so much May, your review is very encouraging :)
Comment from Natalie Goodwin
This was an interesting story, with an amusing ending. I look forward to reading more of it when you write more. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2020
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This was an interesting story, with an amusing ending. I look forward to reading more of it when you write more. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 03-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2020
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Thank you so much for your wonderful review. Stay tuned there will be more tomorrow.
