Our Droplets Mingle
From the personal to the global.18 total reviews
Comment from emmaysavage
Your first stanza really captured me, and the last made a very good point. Your metaphor is very apt, and you carry it through to the last.
reply by the author on 15-Jan-2020
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Your first stanza really captured me, and the last made a very good point. Your metaphor is very apt, and you carry it through to the last.
Comment Written 15-Jan-2020
reply by the author on 15-Jan-2020
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Thank you!
Comment from Tina Crute
"In peril, we ignore tomorrow," stands out most to me, because it warns of ramifications to come. Your poem meanders just as a brook or a stream would, and leads the reader to question whether we are ignoring a peril, environmental troubles.
Great use of analogy!
Tina
reply by the author on 15-Jan-2020
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"In peril, we ignore tomorrow," stands out most to me, because it warns of ramifications to come. Your poem meanders just as a brook or a stream would, and leads the reader to question whether we are ignoring a peril, environmental troubles.
Great use of analogy!
Tina
Comment Written 15-Jan-2020
reply by the author on 15-Jan-2020
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Thanks for validating my serious side!
Comment from dmt1967
This poem is very powerful and the words hit home what we are doing to the planet. The picture is also a powerful reminder and goes well with the words. Thank you for sharing.
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This poem is very powerful and the words hit home what we are doing to the planet. The picture is also a powerful reminder and goes well with the words. Thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 15-Jan-2020
Comment from May 1
This poem creates such a vivid image in my mind, it's wonderful. I also love the image and colors you chose since they work perfectly. All in all, I really enjoyed reading this poem.
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This poem creates such a vivid image in my mind, it's wonderful. I also love the image and colors you chose since they work perfectly. All in all, I really enjoyed reading this poem.
Comment Written 15-Jan-2020
Comment from June Sargent
Our thoughts and words - expressed or not - influence our decisions in life. Like water flowing down the mountains, these thoughts, words or decisions will ultimately touch other lives for good or bad. Think of the consequences - and not just ourselves. A lot of food for thought here
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Our thoughts and words - expressed or not - influence our decisions in life. Like water flowing down the mountains, these thoughts, words or decisions will ultimately touch other lives for good or bad. Think of the consequences - and not just ourselves. A lot of food for thought here
Comment Written 15-Jan-2020
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
In England we suffer from flooding from time to time and it can destroy people's homes. You made this rain romantic, although your poem also adds a warning here, this is a poignant verse Lisa:
Dammed up, it can be a mistake.
Filling with tears through numerous years
then opening up the floodgate.
Let loose, we drown in sorrow.
Love Dolly x
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In England we suffer from flooding from time to time and it can destroy people's homes. You made this rain romantic, although your poem also adds a warning here, this is a poignant verse Lisa:
Dammed up, it can be a mistake.
Filling with tears through numerous years
then opening up the floodgate.
Let loose, we drown in sorrow.
Love Dolly x
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 15-Jan-2020
Comment from phill doran
Hello Lisa May
Well, I know it is a matter of personal preference etc, but I much prefer to read you when you apply yourself to this quality of work. This is not to be disrespectful of your lighter work, but you do have a talent and it is enjoyable to both read engaging works and to learn from the process of reading too.
There's clever use of words and rhyme here - a self-evident pace to the reading of an extended metaphor and a thoughtful - sad - conclusion.
This is an enjoyable piece - I thank you for the opportunity to read it and I wish you well with your continued writing.
The sea refuses no river.
cheers
phill
reply by the author on 15-Jan-2020
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Hello Lisa May
Well, I know it is a matter of personal preference etc, but I much prefer to read you when you apply yourself to this quality of work. This is not to be disrespectful of your lighter work, but you do have a talent and it is enjoyable to both read engaging works and to learn from the process of reading too.
There's clever use of words and rhyme here - a self-evident pace to the reading of an extended metaphor and a thoughtful - sad - conclusion.
This is an enjoyable piece - I thank you for the opportunity to read it and I wish you well with your continued writing.
The sea refuses no river.
cheers
phill
Comment Written 15-Jan-2020
reply by the author on 15-Jan-2020
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Hello phill
thank you so much for validating my serious side with your terrific review.
Comment from CrystieCookie999
This is an interesting poem with some internal rhyme and some end rhymes. I think it could be read with a psychological slant or an environmental slant. Either way leads to a 'peril' that ought not to be ignored. I think you do a good job with the form you are working with. Here is where the lines show it can be interpreted at least two ways: Some stay bright and clear at the heart,
while some lead a troubled path -
dashing on boulders until they get older
Thanks for posting!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
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This is an interesting poem with some internal rhyme and some end rhymes. I think it could be read with a psychological slant or an environmental slant. Either way leads to a 'peril' that ought not to be ignored. I think you do a good job with the form you are working with. Here is where the lines show it can be interpreted at least two ways: Some stay bright and clear at the heart,
while some lead a troubled path -
dashing on boulders until they get older
Thanks for posting!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 15-Jan-2020
