The Pitches
Viewing comments for Prologue "The Pitches "Backgound to support Pez and Pallas
24 total reviews
Comment from Mistydawn
That's a scary scenario a looney tune with a gun and a mission. I'm sure it's happened thousands of times over in real life. All gun control does is make it harder for law-abiding citizens to purchase a gun. This thought would make a great novel. I've written a couple based on a nut with a weapon and their unpredictability makes interesting scenarios. It's well-written, interesting, very believable. Good luck with your contest.
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2019
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That's a scary scenario a looney tune with a gun and a mission. I'm sure it's happened thousands of times over in real life. All gun control does is make it harder for law-abiding citizens to purchase a gun. This thought would make a great novel. I've written a couple based on a nut with a weapon and their unpredictability makes interesting scenarios. It's well-written, interesting, very believable. Good luck with your contest.
Comment Written 30-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2019
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The emerging, main character, Pez, will be molded into the forty-year-old adult he is now through the following experiences living with Peril and Pom Pon.
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I thought it might be a backstory to your scripts.
Comment from Jesse James Doty
Whoa! This is powerful! Even though I saw the last line coming, it still sent shivers down my spine. I remember Ronald Reagan's decision and the consequences that are still reverberating to this day. He thought that "community clinics" would pick up the slack, and boy was he wrong! You have to have enough functional ability to seek out what little these local clinics had to offer. And then be willing to take the prescribed medication at the prescribed time and go to appointments and be willing to see counselors, who are underpaid and underqualified to deal with these individuals who, most of them, needed constant supervision and care. It was one of the biggest mistakes of his career. And, don't get me started about their easy ability to get guns...
As far as the story, it is what well written and realistic and deserves the six stars I am giving it. Thank you for addressing an issue that needs to be talked about and considered in this day and age.
Take care, Jesse
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2019
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Whoa! This is powerful! Even though I saw the last line coming, it still sent shivers down my spine. I remember Ronald Reagan's decision and the consequences that are still reverberating to this day. He thought that "community clinics" would pick up the slack, and boy was he wrong! You have to have enough functional ability to seek out what little these local clinics had to offer. And then be willing to take the prescribed medication at the prescribed time and go to appointments and be willing to see counselors, who are underpaid and underqualified to deal with these individuals who, most of them, needed constant supervision and care. It was one of the biggest mistakes of his career. And, don't get me started about their easy ability to get guns...
As far as the story, it is what well written and realistic and deserves the six stars I am giving it. Thank you for addressing an issue that needs to be talked about and considered in this day and age.
Take care, Jesse
Comment Written 30-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2019
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My thought was to create a backstory for the coming of age of Pez Pitch. I may just build that mosaic background through short stories and eventually revise it all into a novella or script. Since he is forty, this era of Reagan works well, as we tend to recall the re-emergence of the American spirit and forget Reaganomics? cost to the unwashed masses.
Thank you for the exceptional review, Jesse. Bill
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Hello Bill.
I wasn't aware of your goal of all this work built around the era of Reagan. Sounds interesting. I am glad you liked my review. I wish you best of luck with your short stories and/or novella or script.
Have a great week.
Take care, Jesse
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
Some people never change! Trump is granting early release to some prisoners. I hope he studies their history better than Reagan did here. I wish all prisoners would be taught an employable skill, so when they left they could work.
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2019
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Some people never change! Trump is granting early release to some prisoners. I hope he studies their history better than Reagan did here. I wish all prisoners would be taught an employable skill, so when they left they could work.
Comment Written 30-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2019
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For some, prison is a trade school for turning the odd gang member into a citizen of the crime world.
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Well it should NOT be. They have the guys locked in. Make them learn to do something useful for future employment.
Comment from Y. M. Roger
Wow -- yeah. Need to include an evaluation of violent tendency and priors on such a crazy order... ? :) :) And would this be our Pez from our stories..? ;) ;) A good thought-provoking offering, Sir Bill -- thank you for sharing and good luck!! Yvette
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2019
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Wow -- yeah. Need to include an evaluation of violent tendency and priors on such a crazy order... ? :) :) And would this be our Pez from our stories..? ;) ;) A good thought-provoking offering, Sir Bill -- thank you for sharing and good luck!! Yvette
Comment Written 29-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2019
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I?m hoping to build a backstory explaining Pez and Pallas? tendencies toward th3 dark side.
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
This is a sad flash fiction and we hope that a spell in prison changes these people so they want to live a good life when they leave, but it is not always the case, a poignant moment write, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2019
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This is a sad flash fiction and we hope that a spell in prison changes these people so they want to live a good life when they leave, but it is not always the case, a poignant moment write, love Dolly x
Comment Written 29-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2019
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Thank you, Dolly, for giving this a look. Bill
Comment from lyenochka
Oh no! Seems like an early release from prison wasn't the right thing unless they could check on the state of mind or intentions of the prisoner. Poor Pez and his mom about to meet up with Peril.
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2019
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Oh no! Seems like an early release from prison wasn't the right thing unless they could check on the state of mind or intentions of the prisoner. Poor Pez and his mom about to meet up with Peril.
Comment Written 29-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2019
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I hope to make Peril?s release one he regrets. This should be a backstory for Pez and Pallas. Thanks for reviewing, lyenochka. Bill
Comment from RShipp
I see another flash story headed our way... I would not want to be one of the 'friends' on Pez's list to visit after his stint in Jackson State Prison.
Good luck in the 75-word flash story contest.
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2019
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I see another flash story headed our way... I would not want to be one of the 'friends' on Pez's list to visit after his stint in Jackson State Prison.
Good luck in the 75-word flash story contest.
Comment Written 29-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2019
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I hope to build a story for Pez and Pallas Pitch from this backstory beginning. Thanks for giving this a look. Bill
Comment from lauralumummu
I like your engaging story. It's well written and witty. A great entry for the contest. Thanks for making the font large enough to read easily. All the best, Laura.
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2019
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I like your engaging story. It's well written and witty. A great entry for the contest. Thanks for making the font large enough to read easily. All the best, Laura.
Comment Written 29-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2019
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Thanks, Laura, for the great review. Bill
Comment from susand3022
Hi Bill, this seems a relevant time for this story with that governor granting clemency for all of those criminals just before he left office recently. One man who is a pedophile and has served under 6 months I think of the several years he received... (though when I heard his crime then his sentence, I was appalled he wasn't in for at least double that time, minimum.) I wonder how much the ex-governor made for that one!
I have absolutely nothing against emptying prisons of people that shouldn't have been put there in the first place. Someone who got caught with a joint 6 years ago for the third time and is now in for life. Stupid crap like that. But the cases have got to be researched one at a time. You can't just grab a handful of people and say, "Okay, since it's Thursday, I've decided that everyone whose last name starts with L and has an odd prison ID number is being granted clemency." That's what it felt like this guy did. It's getting scary out there.
A very good story. :)
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2019
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Hi Bill, this seems a relevant time for this story with that governor granting clemency for all of those criminals just before he left office recently. One man who is a pedophile and has served under 6 months I think of the several years he received... (though when I heard his crime then his sentence, I was appalled he wasn't in for at least double that time, minimum.) I wonder how much the ex-governor made for that one!
I have absolutely nothing against emptying prisons of people that shouldn't have been put there in the first place. Someone who got caught with a joint 6 years ago for the third time and is now in for life. Stupid crap like that. But the cases have got to be researched one at a time. You can't just grab a handful of people and say, "Okay, since it's Thursday, I've decided that everyone whose last name starts with L and has an odd prison ID number is being granted clemency." That's what it felt like this guy did. It's getting scary out there.
A very good story. :)
Comment Written 29-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2019
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Thank you, Susan. I recall that the homeless problem tripled when Reagan emptied the asylums of anyone who wasn't strap-down crazy.
Comment from Mark D. R.
Bill
so much for quality prison reform and guidance about how to survive in society!
Funny story with the twist at the end (-;
Good luck in the competition.
Mark
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2019
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Bill
so much for quality prison reform and guidance about how to survive in society!
Funny story with the twist at the end (-;
Good luck in the competition.
Mark
Comment Written 29-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2019
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Thank you, Mark
