Bereft
When the love feels gone.8 total reviews
Comment from sunnilicious
It is sad when a great relationship grows apart. Love is something we all have to work at as it is based upon giving and taking, sharing and caring. You wrote about it quite elegantly. Nice work. Good luck in the contest :)
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2019
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It is sad when a great relationship grows apart. Love is something we all have to work at as it is based upon giving and taking, sharing and caring. You wrote about it quite elegantly. Nice work. Good luck in the contest :)
Comment Written 06-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2019
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Thank You for your kind words!
Comment from Sharon Haiste
I like this verse that you've entered in the Minute contest.
It is a lovely read. But, I think your rhymed might be off. It should be aa bb cc dd and so on.
Best of luck with the contest.
Sharon
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2019
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I like this verse that you've entered in the Minute contest.
It is a lovely read. But, I think your rhymed might be off. It should be aa bb cc dd and so on.
Best of luck with the contest.
Sharon
Comment Written 06-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2019
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Thank You!
Comment from Alex Rosel
This is a good entry for the contest. I especially like how you've used formatting to split the stanzas, using the 8-syllable line as a smooth transition into the three 4-syllable lines {thumbs up}.
Best of luck with the competition {smiles}.
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2019
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This is a good entry for the contest. I especially like how you've used formatting to split the stanzas, using the 8-syllable line as a smooth transition into the three 4-syllable lines {thumbs up}.
Best of luck with the competition {smiles}.
Comment Written 05-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2019
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Thank You!
Comment from the13thpoet
Well, well, well, hello Brenda, my friend, I enjoyed your minute poem. I just submitted my entry, so I guess you're competition. I love what you did with it, great job! Good luck in the contest!
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2019
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Well, well, well, hello Brenda, my friend, I enjoyed your minute poem. I just submitted my entry, so I guess you're competition. I love what you did with it, great job! Good luck in the contest!
Comment Written 05-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2019
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Thank You So Much!
Comment from Mistydawn
What a beautiful poem. Very descriptive, emotional. I could feel your grief when he's gone and the happiness when he returns. Very nicely done. Your artwork is beautiful. It signifying just how fragile our minds can be.
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2019
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What a beautiful poem. Very descriptive, emotional. I could feel your grief when he's gone and the happiness when he returns. Very nicely done. Your artwork is beautiful. It signifying just how fragile our minds can be.
Comment Written 03-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2019
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Thank You!
Comment from Sally Law
Where you been?
Miss you so!
Heart in mend?
Kind regards, I send.
Don't be so long
to post your song.
Sally xoxo
PS~ Superb minute poem. :)
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2019
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Where you been?
Miss you so!
Heart in mend?
Kind regards, I send.
Don't be so long
to post your song.
Sally xoxo
PS~ Superb minute poem. :)
Comment Written 03-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2019
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Thanks Sally! It's been a bit rough for awhile. You're right still on the mend but feeling hopeful!
Comment from Miranda Langston
i think you should change it to "my state of mind" instead of mine, but other than that, it's a great poem. best of luck to you in the contest ^.^ it's really wonderful
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2019
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i think you should change it to "my state of mind" instead of mine, but other than that, it's a great poem. best of luck to you in the contest ^.^ it's really wonderful
Comment Written 03-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2019
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Thank you!
Comment from Y. M. Roger
A very good beginning to a poem, Brenda, but you're missing two very important aspects:
First, the rhyme scheme -- it must be aabb, ccdd, eeff
Second, your poem should be three stanzas
Please let me know when you've had a chance to re-work and I would be happy to re-review. :) Thank you and good luck with your endeavors! :)
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2019
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A very good beginning to a poem, Brenda, but you're missing two very important aspects:
First, the rhyme scheme -- it must be aabb, ccdd, eeff
Second, your poem should be three stanzas
Please let me know when you've had a chance to re-work and I would be happy to re-review. :) Thank you and good luck with your endeavors! :)
Comment Written 03-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2019
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Thank you. I misunderstand. I thought it just needed to be 844. That's why it was so short.
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Thanks again. I reworked the poem but once completed it has too many stanzas. I'm attempting to remove it from contest consideration. Because i believe that to remove one of the stanzas would diminish the poem.
