Before
our contract we know not39 total reviews
Comment from Michael McCottry Bell Jr
You always write DEEP and WONDERFUL Poems Doug, I love this opening line.
I was sworn
long before
the birth
was born
And the way you ended it with
A lonely
barren love
mortality
Truly is spectacular. I thought I remember you once telling me you didn't think your writing was all that good. This one you did is GREAT! I love the image you chose. This will relate to everyone that time is the worst enemy to mortality. You have inspired me to write a poem Sir Douglas ;)
Keep the great stuff coming and stop saying your not that good.
Michael
reply by the author on 06-Dec-2019
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You always write DEEP and WONDERFUL Poems Doug, I love this opening line.
I was sworn
long before
the birth
was born
And the way you ended it with
A lonely
barren love
mortality
Truly is spectacular. I thought I remember you once telling me you didn't think your writing was all that good. This one you did is GREAT! I love the image you chose. This will relate to everyone that time is the worst enemy to mortality. You have inspired me to write a poem Sir Douglas ;)
Keep the great stuff coming and stop saying your not that good.
Michael
Comment Written 03-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 06-Dec-2019
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Michael, you have, in a very short time, kind of astounded me with your perceptions. It is late now, but I wanted/needed to reply to you. Thank you. I will try to find time to PM you later. Doug
Comment from Janice Canerdy
Your thought-provoking free verse poem conveys a strong message about life, what happens once we leave the warmth and safety of the womb. Not all is good.
reply by the author on 09-Dec-2019
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Your thought-provoking free verse poem conveys a strong message about life, what happens once we leave the warmth and safety of the womb. Not all is good.
Comment Written 03-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 09-Dec-2019
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Yup. That sums it up nicely. Doug
Comment from Sally Law
Yes, I have lost such a one early on. God allowed me to look upon her for a few minutes and hold her close, kiss her chubby cheeks. Never a day goes by my heart doesn't ache for her. But, I will see her again in heaven so I must wait patiently. This was beautiful, dear poet, and stirred my own loss so early today. The abstract you chose crowned you piece so nicely. Superb and filled with longing.
Sending you my best today as always,
Sally
reply by the author on 06-Dec-2019
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Yes, I have lost such a one early on. God allowed me to look upon her for a few minutes and hold her close, kiss her chubby cheeks. Never a day goes by my heart doesn't ache for her. But, I will see her again in heaven so I must wait patiently. This was beautiful, dear poet, and stirred my own loss so early today. The abstract you chose crowned you piece so nicely. Superb and filled with longing.
Sending you my best today as always,
Sally
Comment Written 03-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 06-Dec-2019
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Thank you, Sally. I believe we both ackowledge life is other than sustainable pleasures. Still...some lessons are more brutal than others, eh? Doug
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You are very welcome. Yes, especially unbearable losses so early on as with my first beautiful granddaughter. Sal
Comment from dragonpoet
This is such a forlorn poem. It seems to say life, though a gift, is only one big challenge and problem from begininng to end. It sounds like a gift you don't like and would like to exchange.
Keep writing.
Joan
reply by the author on 09-Dec-2019
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This is such a forlorn poem. It seems to say life, though a gift, is only one big challenge and problem from begininng to end. It sounds like a gift you don't like and would like to exchange.
Keep writing.
Joan
Comment Written 03-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 09-Dec-2019
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Joan...that is as perceptive as any possible "take" on this. I loved your reply. Doug
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You're very welcome, Doug. Glad you liked my interpretation of your poem.
Joan
Comment from Alex Rosel
This is an intriguing poem, and your presentation, using a bright yellow background for the text, adds to the intrigue.
I particularly like:
"Yet
age betrays us
well".
Aging is inevitable, and so it's consequences are themselves inevitable. You have tapped into that inevitability, and it sits well with the sentiments expressed elsewhere in the poem {thumbs up}.
Thank you for a thought provoking post {smiles}.
reply by the author on 09-Dec-2019
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This is an intriguing poem, and your presentation, using a bright yellow background for the text, adds to the intrigue.
I particularly like:
"Yet
age betrays us
well".
Aging is inevitable, and so it's consequences are themselves inevitable. You have tapped into that inevitability, and it sits well with the sentiments expressed elsewhere in the poem {thumbs up}.
Thank you for a thought provoking post {smiles}.
Comment Written 03-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 09-Dec-2019
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My, what a wonderful review. Thank you. Doug
Comment from Darlene Franklin
I like the individual stanzas, in their pared-down words that flow well, they pack a punch, For life is nothing but a gift, especially. I'll confess I'm at a loss to understand what they mean together. Age betrays us well--as a senior in a nursing home, I know of some of t hose betrayals, but for me, life continues with great joy!
reply by the author on 09-Dec-2019
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I like the individual stanzas, in their pared-down words that flow well, they pack a punch, For life is nothing but a gift, especially. I'll confess I'm at a loss to understand what they mean together. Age betrays us well--as a senior in a nursing home, I know of some of t hose betrayals, but for me, life continues with great joy!
Comment Written 03-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 09-Dec-2019
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That's most likely because you have accepted or perhaps recognized is a better word-life, your place in it, and learned to love what you are and what you have. I, am, an eternal rebel. Never at peace. Always challenging. And i hope, i will not pay an eternal price. But I did not make myself. He did. And circumstances did. And I am very much afraid, to be true to myself...I must take, Satan's argument. Perhaps, distorted. Perhaps, he is the King of liars. But...he dared to question. And we...are given deity-like essence? Intelligence? Free-will? But we dare not question. Only Blaaat. Like sheep. Uh huh. I may suffer for an eternity for using what I was given. Doug
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Doug, I'm a great believer in questions. God has never condemned someone's honest questions. But he rarely answers them, either. Instead he says simply, I'm God, you're not.
So perhaps, same difference. If he made you a rebel, perhaps that's your purpose! Just my thoughts. Darlene.
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written heartfelt and thought-provoking poem. Only God knows how long His contract with us will last. We should not waste one second of our time while we are still around.
reply by the author on 09-Dec-2019
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A very well-written heartfelt and thought-provoking poem. Only God knows how long His contract with us will last. We should not waste one second of our time while we are still around.
Comment Written 03-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 09-Dec-2019
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Exactly right. I am impressed. Doug
Comment from Therese Caron
What a great life and love poem. I feel that the author is trying to describe going through life, but I'm not sure if he is going further than that, specifically going through love. I love â??the yoke you bore with print so blurredâ??. I addition, the â??blurredâ?? image you chose is perfect. Wonderful poem!
reply by the author on 06-Dec-2019
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What a great life and love poem. I feel that the author is trying to describe going through life, but I'm not sure if he is going further than that, specifically going through love. I love â??the yoke you bore with print so blurredâ??. I addition, the â??blurredâ?? image you chose is perfect. Wonderful poem!
Comment Written 03-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 06-Dec-2019
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Ah Terry, how nice to have aquired a new friend. You, my dear. Thank you. Doug
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I don?t think this word processor likes quotation marks. I think I will leave them out in the future!
Comment from country ranch writer
Very nice presentation for this one a wonderous gift from God to enjoy before one is all grown up and leaving home from our life forever.
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reply by the author on 09-Dec-2019
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Very nice presentation for this one a wonderous gift from God to enjoy before one is all grown up and leaving home from our life forever.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 03-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 09-Dec-2019
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Yes, you have a slightly different "take", but a correct one. Thank you. Doug
