Reviews from

St Louis

Viewing comments for Chapter 41 "St. Louis Chapter 17 part 3"
Can McKenzie solve Megan Nelson?s murder?

15 total reviews 
Comment from Thomas Bowling
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Logan laughed out loud.
McKenzie opened the car door, slammed it, and ran into the house.

McKenzie is pretty high strung. Logan should take a pass.

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 Comment Written 24-Nov-2019


reply by the author on 24-Nov-2019
    LOL I tend to agree, but I have a feeling it will be worth it. Great things are worth waiting for. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Ulla
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Hi Barbara, it's very well written and Logan is a very likable man and I have great confidence in him. The one I have difficulty to believe in is Mac. What woman at 27 in today's time and age has never been with a man? Well that is a normally functioning woman who is attracted to men.
"I can imagine your parents being happy about you living with a single female?" = "I can't imagine your parents being happy about you living with a single female?"
Looking forward to what's next. Ulla xx

 Comment Written 24-Nov-2019


reply by the author on 24-Nov-2019
    I will fix that area. I think when all of Mac's information comes out it will be understandable. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Sankey
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

They've known each other a week and perhaps already getting quite close. I still enjoy your story and glad I am here for another year. The lady who might pay for my biography to be published is reading my book now. OK spag and suggestion time. "I can('t) imagine your parents

I didn't mean that like[d] it sounded.

In the following EITHER I don't want it to (be) pretend(ing).

OR I don't want [it] to pretend.


 Comment Written 24-Nov-2019


reply by the author on 24-Nov-2019
    I just made the changes. Thank you for those catches. Those little words always get me. LOL
Comment from royowen
Excellent
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It's the first time some romantic ground has been broken, and I'm glad that Mac is virginal, and that she realises that Logan is an honourable man. But I like your women, they are strong, but with fine, upstanding qualities. You are a high quality person yourself, well done, blessings, Roy

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 Comment Written 24-Nov-2019


reply by the author on 24-Nov-2019
    Thank you for the understanding. I take a lot of hits concerning my females.
reply by royowen on 24-Nov-2019
    Most welcome
Comment from judiverse
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This is excellent. Not only is there a mystery about Megan's death, there's also a mystery about whatever in Mac's background is bugging her. She is super-sensitive on some issues, and is really touchy about Logan staying in the apartment. The talk about "shacking up" upsets her quite a bit. She seems to take her issues out on Logan, when he's mostly concerned about her safety. I'm beginning to think a history of abuse in Mac's past. Great chapter, and as usual you keep the suspense going. judi

 Comment Written 24-Nov-2019


reply by the author on 24-Nov-2019
    Thank you for the great insight. You're closer than you know.
reply by judiverse on 24-Nov-2019
    You're welcome. Something like childhood abuse would make her distrust men. judi