Windows of the Blind
Writing from the heart a Nonet11 total reviews
Comment from Y. M. Roger
This one is a lonely one, Jose -- tells me that you might be trying too hard because the feelings that come through are those of weariness and, perhaps, lost/looking... :) You've managed to bring the reader into your realm of emptiness, but there are images - even ones like the one you've chosen here - just out of sight. Maybe take some time and not think about writing and then come back to us when something strikes your fancy...or concentrate on someone who's there in your life and bring them into our lives as well! ;) :) Always look forward to your pen.... let it sing for us! ;)
Good luck in the contest! ;) Yvette
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2019
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This one is a lonely one, Jose -- tells me that you might be trying too hard because the feelings that come through are those of weariness and, perhaps, lost/looking... :) You've managed to bring the reader into your realm of emptiness, but there are images - even ones like the one you've chosen here - just out of sight. Maybe take some time and not think about writing and then come back to us when something strikes your fancy...or concentrate on someone who's there in your life and bring them into our lives as well! ;) :) Always look forward to your pen.... let it sing for us! ;)
Good luck in the contest! ;) Yvette
Comment Written 17-Nov-2019
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2019
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Thank you Yvette.
Comment from aryr
This was very well done Jose, it definitely addressed a problem that so many suffer, which is the physical and emotional loss of sight. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2019
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This was very well done Jose, it definitely addressed a problem that so many suffer, which is the physical and emotional loss of sight. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 17-Nov-2019
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2019
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Thanks Alie.
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most welcome Jose.
Comment from Sugarray77
This is a very meaningful Nonet, Jose. You did a good job expressing depth of feeling and a resonating heartbeat. A very moving poem with great feeling. Good luck in the Nonet contest.
Melissa
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2019
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This is a very meaningful Nonet, Jose. You did a good job expressing depth of feeling and a resonating heartbeat. A very moving poem with great feeling. Good luck in the Nonet contest.
Melissa
Comment Written 15-Nov-2019
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2019
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Thank you Melissa.
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written heartfelt Nonet about writing without feeling involved in what we are writing about. We cannot feel the readers or what they may experience when reading our thoughts.
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2019
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A very well-written heartfelt Nonet about writing without feeling involved in what we are writing about. We cannot feel the readers or what they may experience when reading our thoughts.
Comment Written 14-Nov-2019
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2019
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Thank you Sandra.
Comment from Michael McCottry Bell Jr
great emotion and image here
Just a mem'ry,
Shades of sight,
I can't
See.
Very descriptive you can put yourself fin that image. What exactly or whom were you writing about?
One suggestion I thought was to definitely go back and add more imagery like the part I jotted here. I am NOT familiar with Nonets I just know that in poetry image and feeling are rated the highest. I love the end of it especially its your call how to do it personally I think you can do even better. (please dont take any offense, I wouldn't be doing my job as a reviewer if I didn't give you honest critique)
Michael
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2019
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great emotion and image here
Just a mem'ry,
Shades of sight,
I can't
See.
Very descriptive you can put yourself fin that image. What exactly or whom were you writing about?
One suggestion I thought was to definitely go back and add more imagery like the part I jotted here. I am NOT familiar with Nonets I just know that in poetry image and feeling are rated the highest. I love the end of it especially its your call how to do it personally I think you can do even better. (please dont take any offense, I wouldn't be doing my job as a reviewer if I didn't give you honest critique)
Michael
Comment Written 14-Nov-2019
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2019
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Thank you Michael.
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
These words are full of grief and sorrow at missing someone who one gave light to you and is now gone, a fine well formed nonet, much enjoyed, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2019
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These words are full of grief and sorrow at missing someone who one gave light to you and is now gone, a fine well formed nonet, much enjoyed, love Dolly x
Comment Written 14-Nov-2019
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2019
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Thank you Dolly.
Comment from Sharon Haiste
I think this is a good entry for the Nonet Poetry contest.
This verse from your heart feels truly heartfelt.
Well done and good luck to you with the contest.
Sharon
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2019
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I think this is a good entry for the Nonet Poetry contest.
This verse from your heart feels truly heartfelt.
Well done and good luck to you with the contest.
Sharon
Comment Written 14-Nov-2019
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2019
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Thank you Sharon.
Comment from Sally Law
Well. I just lost the contest, dear poet. You vaporized me on this one. This is about as deep and emotional as it gets. Perfect syllable count, and a worthy entry from your soul. I apologize for no six, it is truly deserving.
Sending you my best today as always,
Sally xo
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2019
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Well. I just lost the contest, dear poet. You vaporized me on this one. This is about as deep and emotional as it gets. Perfect syllable count, and a worthy entry from your soul. I apologize for no six, it is truly deserving.
Sending you my best today as always,
Sally xo
Comment Written 14-Nov-2019
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2019
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Thank you Sally.
Comment from Bill Pinder
Sorry about your problems with your eyesight. This is a very well written and moving poem. It definitely expresses a very heavy feeling of sadness. Thanks for writing!
Bill
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2019
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Sorry about your problems with your eyesight. This is a very well written and moving poem. It definitely expresses a very heavy feeling of sadness. Thanks for writing!
Bill
Comment Written 14-Nov-2019
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2019
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Thank you Bill.
Comment from royowen
I can understand where you're going, there needs to a soul attachment to one's writing, if one just writes without a passion, then it's fairly pointless. Writing has to have soul in it. Well done, I can feel your heart in this nonet poem. Good work, good luck blessings, Roy
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reply by the author on 17-Nov-2019
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I can understand where you're going, there needs to a soul attachment to one's writing, if one just writes without a passion, then it's fairly pointless. Writing has to have soul in it. Well done, I can feel your heart in this nonet poem. Good work, good luck blessings, Roy
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 14-Nov-2019
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2019
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Thank you Roy. Trying for a tear this time.
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Good job
