Comment from Pantygynt

Excellent

A nasty bit of work indeed this interrogator. I knew the loss of that back pack would cause problems.

I particularly liked the very realistic, even onomatopoeic, description of the helicopter's arrival and flight path, but then I suppose I should have expected that, given your background.

 Comment Written 07-Nov-2019

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reply by the author on 07-Nov-2019

Thanks, Jim. Only time I?ve been in a helicopter was being winched out of the ocean after a sea survival exercise. Two wings and four engines for me!

reply by Pantygynt on 08-Nov-2019

I bet you have heard and seen a fee though.

Comment from juliaSjames

Exceptional

"Three rows of medal ribbon" - "ribbons"

"With bravado that I did not feel" - since bravado means a show of bravery, suggest " Assuming an air of bravado"

This is a wonderfully written chapter, Tony. The descriptions are so vivid that the reader is there with Charles and Helen in their predicament. The helicopter rearing like a warhorse stands out.

Hope they won't torture Charles.

On the edge of my seat waiting for your next post.

Blessings Julia

 Comment Written 07-Nov-2019

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reply by the author on 07-Nov-2019

Thanks very much for this affirming six-star review and suggested re-wording. I think you?re right in both instances.
Best wishes, Tony

reply by juliaSjames on 07-Nov-2019

You're welcome, Tony

Comment from Whitney Rines

Excellent

This was fantastic, I could see everything I was reading and definitely feel the tension in it. Although I started at a later chapter, I didn't get the feeling of being lost in the story at all. I will definitely have to read this one from the beginning. Thank you for the read.

 Comment Written 07-Nov-2019

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reply by the author on 07-Nov-2019

Thanks, Whitney, for dropping by to review this chapter and for your kind and supportive comments. Much appreciated. All good wishes, Tony

Comment from __Lou__

Excellent

I haven't read any of the other chapters but reading this one definitely makes me want to. It is very well written and I can picture the scene quite clearly. The dialogue and the way they speak seems a bit out of place (just from this chapter alone) as they speak almost old English, I imagine an English voice in medieval days. But there are helicopters and guns so it doesn't really fit to me. Like I understand that he is British but it also sounds like he's 70. That is just what I get from my observations. Once I have read the other chapters I will correct myself. I really enjoyed this, good luck with the rest of it and great work!

 Comment Written 07-Nov-2019

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reply by the author on 07-Nov-2019

Thanks, Lou, for dropping by to review this chapter and for your kind and supportive comments. Much appreciated. I shall have to have another look at that dialogue. I had imagined Charles to be in his forties. I appreciate your observation about the language. All good wishes, Tony

Comment from JudyE

Exceptional

Goodness, Charles and Helen would seem to be in deep trouble now. A very few points for you to consider, none of which I'm sure about.

I was left tied up in the dark for over an hour. - I'm wondering if he would have known how long he'd been tied although it's probably not important. I might have said 'in the dark for what seemed like ...??'

Three rows of medal ribbon were attached to his uniform jacket - should 'ribbon' be plural?

With bravado that I did not feel - is the usual phrase 'With a bravado..?'

Kind regards
Judy

 Comment Written 07-Nov-2019

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reply by the author on 07-Nov-2019

Thanks for your great support and detailed reading. Always appreciated. I agree with the first two of your suggestions and have made changes in line with them.
I've never seen 'bravado' used with an article preceding it, but there did seem to be something wrong with the way I had expressed the sentence. I've now changed it to 'an air of bravado', for it wasn't actually bravado, but just an appearance of it.
Many thanks for the sixth star. You spoil me!

Comment from Pearl Edwards

Excellent

Well this time they really do seem to be in trouble, well Charles at least.
Well told Tony, very dramatic scenes both the quick capture and in the interview room. Great chapter,
cheers,
valda

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 Comment Written 07-Nov-2019

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reply by the author on 09-Nov-2019

Very many thanks for your comments, Valda. Things do seem to be going from bad to worse for this unfortunate pair. All the best, Tony

Comment from CrystieCookie999

Excellent

This chapter proceeds with the action nicely. It seems Charles Brandon has lost track of Helen for a while, which can't make the interrogation going on any easier at all. Plus it sounds like Tariq Habeeb is more than a little full of himself. Also Habeeb and Hussein are not above the beginning of torture here. I am hoping something will turn out well.

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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 07-Nov-2019

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reply by the author on 09-Nov-2019

Thanks for your continued interest and support, Cindy. I value your comments. Many abuses happen behind closed doors, and I fear for their safety. As you say, Habeeb and Hussein seem to be unsavoury characters. All the best, Tony