One Day Beauty
Short stay, but sweet.3 total reviews
Comment from juliaSjames
I applaud your choice of the cactus flower. I have seen plants covered in night opening flowers. It's a miracle of nature, more beautiful because it's infrequent. Best of luck in the contest.
Blessings Julia
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2019
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I applaud your choice of the cactus flower. I have seen plants covered in night opening flowers. It's a miracle of nature, more beautiful because it's infrequent. Best of luck in the contest.
Blessings Julia
Comment Written 31-Oct-2019
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2019
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Thank you for your read and your comment. Was lucky to be in the desert in the spring when some were opening.
Comment from Brooklyn J. Frances
What a bright and cheery little haiku! I could sense your affection for your sweet little plant. The only thing this poem seems to be missing is a conclusion. Is there a lesson you have learned from this flower, or an emotion it makes you feel? Maybe try condensing these thoughts into the first two lines, and use the last line for a conclusion. I find that despite their shortness, haikus are most satisfying when written that way. I look forward to seeing what you write in the future!
reply by the author on 30-Oct-2019
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What a bright and cheery little haiku! I could sense your affection for your sweet little plant. The only thing this poem seems to be missing is a conclusion. Is there a lesson you have learned from this flower, or an emotion it makes you feel? Maybe try condensing these thoughts into the first two lines, and use the last line for a conclusion. I find that despite their shortness, haikus are most satisfying when written that way. I look forward to seeing what you write in the future!
Comment Written 30-Oct-2019
reply by the author on 30-Oct-2019
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Thanks for the tip. I have revised as follows:
my little cactus
has sharp spines, bloom for a day
exquisite beauty!
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Very nice!
Comment from NickieT
I love cacti! I think that you have done a good job highlighting the sharp and dangerous element along with the beauty of these succulents. Best of luck!
reply by the author on 30-Oct-2019
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I love cacti! I think that you have done a good job highlighting the sharp and dangerous element along with the beauty of these succulents. Best of luck!
Comment Written 30-Oct-2019
reply by the author on 30-Oct-2019
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Thanks for your comments and read. Upon another suggestion I changed it a bit to:
my little cactus
has sharp spines, bloom for a day
exquisite beauty!
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I like that rewrite =)
