Could I Be Losing You
Trying to rebuild a fading love45 total reviews
Comment from Nowhereman1
Very well written poem, I could feel the love in your words. I hope my wife feels that way about me when im gone one day. Thank you for sharing
  |
Very well written poem, I could feel the love in your words. I hope my wife feels that way about me when im gone one day. Thank you for sharing
Comment Written 30-Sep-2019
Comment from Pam (respa)
-Thanks for sharing the
note and the poem, jaybird.
-Your love of your wife
shows through in the poem
because it comes from your heart.
-This image shows that very well:
"...now I stand poor,
against the wall."
-I also like the reference to the eagle.
-I am sorry for your loss, and
appreciate you sharing the poem.
|
-Thanks for sharing the
note and the poem, jaybird.
-Your love of your wife
shows through in the poem
because it comes from your heart.
-This image shows that very well:
"...now I stand poor,
against the wall."
-I also like the reference to the eagle.
-I am sorry for your loss, and
appreciate you sharing the poem.
Comment Written 30-Sep-2019
Comment from duchessofdrumborg
"Could I Be Losing You", is an extremely well-written and delightfully descriptive piece. This talented poet's work was a pleasure to both read and review. I look forward to seeing your next post.
|
"Could I Be Losing You", is an extremely well-written and delightfully descriptive piece. This talented poet's work was a pleasure to both read and review. I look forward to seeing your next post.
Comment Written 30-Sep-2019
Comment from Patty Palmer
Great job on this poem. The rhyme and rhythm come together completely. Married thirty-three years? Congratulations on a long and happy marriage. We'll be married 45 years in December.
|
Great job on this poem. The rhyme and rhythm come together completely. Married thirty-three years? Congratulations on a long and happy marriage. We'll be married 45 years in December.
Comment Written 30-Sep-2019
Comment from CrystieCookie999
It is always hard when people are missing loved ones who have passed away. Communications ceases, or nearly. The last stanza seems especially plaintive. Without faith, we do feel poor and backed against a wall, vulnerable. We feel a need to reach out even when, as the speaker wishes, someone is not there to hear our call in person, but somehow there is a way to communicate to regain some of that chance to 'make my life as bright as noon' once more. Interesting rhyme scheme. It makes it feel more cohesive than the speaker in the poem feels.
|
It is always hard when people are missing loved ones who have passed away. Communications ceases, or nearly. The last stanza seems especially plaintive. Without faith, we do feel poor and backed against a wall, vulnerable. We feel a need to reach out even when, as the speaker wishes, someone is not there to hear our call in person, but somehow there is a way to communicate to regain some of that chance to 'make my life as bright as noon' once more. Interesting rhyme scheme. It makes it feel more cohesive than the speaker in the poem feels.
Comment Written 29-Sep-2019
Comment from C. Gale Burnett
I can feel the lonely heartache of the one crying out for its future mate.
The rhyme was exquisite. I especially love that the last line of each stanza is four syllables, and each rhyming.
So beautiful :)
|
I can feel the lonely heartache of the one crying out for its future mate.
The rhyme was exquisite. I especially love that the last line of each stanza is four syllables, and each rhyming.
So beautiful :)
Comment Written 29-Sep-2019
Comment from Lance S. Loria
A wonderful emotion-filled poem of love. I particularly like the rhyming scheme you employed. Not to mention rhymes that actually rhyme. Something which is lacking in many works on this site. Again, well written and enjoyable to read. No edits or adjustments necessary.
|
A wonderful emotion-filled poem of love. I particularly like the rhyming scheme you employed. Not to mention rhymes that actually rhyme. Something which is lacking in many works on this site. Again, well written and enjoyable to read. No edits or adjustments necessary.
Comment Written 29-Sep-2019
Comment from A. Willow Bends
Your poetry always, ALWAYS touches my heart. You have a gift, my friend and I am so glad you found it, used it, still use and honor us by bringing forth things you have created in the past. It is your art. Great job.
You are a joy to read and therefore, I can only assume a joy as a human being!
Wendy
|
Your poetry always, ALWAYS touches my heart. You have a gift, my friend and I am so glad you found it, used it, still use and honor us by bringing forth things you have created in the past. It is your art. Great job.
You are a joy to read and therefore, I can only assume a joy as a human being!
Wendy
Comment Written 29-Sep-2019
Comment from Kathleen S.
Beautiful. I am glad to read about it in your author notes. It's romantic to hear about a love that worked out well and happily and stood the test of time. Very well done.
|
Beautiful. I am glad to read about it in your author notes. It's romantic to hear about a love that worked out well and happily and stood the test of time. Very well done.
Comment Written 29-Sep-2019
Comment from juliaSjames
I'm delighted that there was a happy ending, because your well penned stanzas deserve it.
The rhyme scheme is particularly lyrical and appealing.
Thanks for sharing.
Blessings Julia
|
I'm delighted that there was a happy ending, because your well penned stanzas deserve it.
The rhyme scheme is particularly lyrical and appealing.
Thanks for sharing.
Blessings Julia
Comment Written 29-Sep-2019
