The French Letter
Viewing comments for Chapter 86 "Some Awkward Conclusions "A Novel
29 total reviews
Comment from Mystic Angel 7777
His mind is really working overtime here. I have to think Helen knows what she is doing and does not have any hidden agenda he should be worried over. All this fretting on his part is going to lead him to do something stupid if he doesn't calm down. Well done and thank you very much for sharing it.
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2019
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His mind is really working overtime here. I have to think Helen knows what she is doing and does not have any hidden agenda he should be worried over. All this fretting on his part is going to lead him to do something stupid if he doesn't calm down. Well done and thank you very much for sharing it.
Comment Written 17-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2019
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Thanks for your reviiew and comments, Monica. Yes, Charles does seem to be overthinking things and getting into a bit of a stew. Let?s hope that it?s much ado about nothing. All good wishes, Tony
Comment from Iza Deleanu
This chapter is about "you can run but you can hide." The two travelers are in short leash and they had no idea until the person that traveled next to Helen break the conspiracy:" "I must say, you'd make a dashed fine punkah wallah in that outfit, Charles. David warned me there might be more to you than meets the eye." Intriguing chapter waiting for the next, thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 17-Sep-2019
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This chapter is about "you can run but you can hide." The two travelers are in short leash and they had no idea until the person that traveled next to Helen break the conspiracy:" "I must say, you'd make a dashed fine punkah wallah in that outfit, Charles. David warned me there might be more to you than meets the eye." Intriguing chapter waiting for the next, thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 16-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 17-Sep-2019
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Thanks, Iza. I appreciate your comments and continued interest in my story. Best wishes, Tony.
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Hmm, I am wondering about feeling like a 'dead man walking.' I know how hard it must be for Charles to stay quiet. I know he's worried about Jeanne. I'm worried about that situation myself. This is another great addition.
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2019
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Hmm, I am wondering about feeling like a 'dead man walking.' I know how hard it must be for Charles to stay quiet. I know he's worried about Jeanne. I'm worried about that situation myself. This is another great addition.
Comment Written 16-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2019
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Thanks, Barbara. As always, I appreciate your review and supportive comments. Best wishes, Tony.
Comment from royowen
I guess that's what life has taught Helen, she's learnt to live in a clandestine world where one needs to live in total acceptance of one's vulnerability, I remember the scripture Jesus shared, "Be as wise as a serpent, but as gentle as a dove" be aware of the world's devices, but leave the rest to God. Poor Charles, he's the dumb dove. Well done Tony, an excellent episode, blessings, Roy
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2019
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I guess that's what life has taught Helen, she's learnt to live in a clandestine world where one needs to live in total acceptance of one's vulnerability, I remember the scripture Jesus shared, "Be as wise as a serpent, but as gentle as a dove" be aware of the world's devices, but leave the rest to God. Poor Charles, he's the dumb dove. Well done Tony, an excellent episode, blessings, Roy
Comment Written 16-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2019
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Wise as a serpent, gentle as a dove - I don?t remember that one. Good grandpa advice!
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Matthew 10:16 Tony.
Comment from Alex Rosel
I like how you set the scene of the capture withWomen carried impossible loads, and mongrels cringed in patches of shade from backyard pawpaw and banana trees. Purple bougainvillea cascaded over a tumbledown fence. [As an aside, I don't think the banana plant is a tree.]
And I also like a loose-fitting shirt stained with sweat, ingrained with poverty. It's nice imagery {smiles}.
I can image I'm there, travelling on the train {smiles}.
I didn't pick up on any spags.
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2019
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I like how you set the scene of the capture withWomen carried impossible loads, and mongrels cringed in patches of shade from backyard pawpaw and banana trees. Purple bougainvillea cascaded over a tumbledown fence. [As an aside, I don't think the banana plant is a tree.]
And I also like a loose-fitting shirt stained with sweat, ingrained with poverty. It's nice imagery {smiles}.
I can image I'm there, travelling on the train {smiles}.
I didn't pick up on any spags.
Comment Written 16-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2019
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I appreciate your review, Alex, and the sixth star. Thanks for noticing the banana tree error. I should know better, having planted two in our garden last year! I?ll change it to ?backyard bananas and pawpaw trees?. All the best, Tony.
Comment from estory
You paint a nice exotic picture of the Himalayan frontier, and also a hint of homesickness, and then lots of intrigue, as Charles starts to wonder whose side Helen is really on. Has she set him up? Did she tip off their enemies? is she a double or triple agent? Lots of unanswered questions simmer in the mind as we await the next chapter. estory
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2019
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You paint a nice exotic picture of the Himalayan frontier, and also a hint of homesickness, and then lots of intrigue, as Charles starts to wonder whose side Helen is really on. Has she set him up? Did she tip off their enemies? is she a double or triple agent? Lots of unanswered questions simmer in the mind as we await the next chapter. estory
Comment Written 16-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2019
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Thanks, estory. As always, I appreciate your review and supportive comments. Best wishes, Tony.
Comment from Sylvia Page
Another impressive piece of writing in this chapter. What is Helen up to, is she playing a double game here? The story is taking on another dimension
having put Charles in a pensive mood. Good imagery too.
Sylvia
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2019
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Another impressive piece of writing in this chapter. What is Helen up to, is she playing a double game here? The story is taking on another dimension
having put Charles in a pensive mood. Good imagery too.
Sylvia
Comment Written 16-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2019
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Thanks for your comments, Sylvia, and your continued support and encouragement. It means a lot. All good wishes, Tony
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
You did a good job with this chapter, Tony. I liked the descriptive words of the scenery as the train passed by. I had my doubts all along about Helen and Jeanne. I believe Helen is the more imminent dangerous one. It will be interesting to see how Charles' covers holds out--or not. If the man on the train knew, then who else will when they arrive? Thanks for sharing. Respectfully with Admiration. Jan
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2019
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You did a good job with this chapter, Tony. I liked the descriptive words of the scenery as the train passed by. I had my doubts all along about Helen and Jeanne. I believe Helen is the more imminent dangerous one. It will be interesting to see how Charles' covers holds out--or not. If the man on the train knew, then who else will when they arrive? Thanks for sharing. Respectfully with Admiration. Jan
Comment Written 16-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2019
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Thanks for your comments, Jan, and your continued support and encouragement. It means a lot to me. All good wishes, Tony
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
The imagery you add to all your chapters draw us right into the area they are in. This was very effective in this part. Looking out the window on the train gave us a view that could have put us sitting on Charles lap! Now, Helen, what is going on with her? Is she on the goodies side? Or has she really led Charles up a cul-de-sac with no way our? Something is amiss. Charles is right to be a bet wary. Superb writing as usual, Tony. Well done. :)) Sandra xx
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2019
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The imagery you add to all your chapters draw us right into the area they are in. This was very effective in this part. Looking out the window on the train gave us a view that could have put us sitting on Charles lap! Now, Helen, what is going on with her? Is she on the goodies side? Or has she really led Charles up a cul-de-sac with no way our? Something is amiss. Charles is right to be a bet wary. Superb writing as usual, Tony. Well done. :)) Sandra xx
Comment Written 16-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2019
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Thanks for your comments, Sandra, and your continued support and encouragement. You know it means a lot to me. I shall be able to build a new Milky Way with all these stars you are awarding! All good wishes, Tony
Comment from Pantygynt
The descriptive first part of this reminded me of my train journey from Columbo to Kandy in 2009.
The central part had some great dialogue the brought us up to date with the situation, a classic example of showing rather than telling. I wonder what your feelings are about 'thinks' passages and the use of italics for the thoughts. This is something I had never come across until I came to FanStory and have yet to find it in a British published hard copy volume, though it appears a lot in Kindl.
Its use here for the thoughts might have rendered them more showy and less telly. What do you think?
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2019
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The descriptive first part of this reminded me of my train journey from Columbo to Kandy in 2009.
The central part had some great dialogue the brought us up to date with the situation, a classic example of showing rather than telling. I wonder what your feelings are about 'thinks' passages and the use of italics for the thoughts. This is something I had never come across until I came to FanStory and have yet to find it in a British published hard copy volume, though it appears a lot in Kindl.
Its use here for the thoughts might have rendered them more showy and less telly. What do you think?
Comment Written 16-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2019
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I was stranded in Colombo for a week in the 1970s, waiting for an engine change. We made the trip up to Kandy by taxi. I still have vivid memories of the logging elephants, roadside batik and woodcarving home industries, and the tea plantations. We stopped for a Sunday curry tiffin in the Kandy hotel, and the obligatory sightseeing trip to the Temple of the Tooth.
I?ve italicised thoughts in some chapters and not in others. I?m not yet sure which way to go in the final edit. I?ve not often seen it done outside FanStory but it does seem to have some merit. In the end, I?ll use current publishing standards if I can find a good guide to them.
