Your Toxic Tantrum
5-7-5 Anger management issue15 total reviews
Comment from Mark D. R.
Lisa
terrific matching of verse with its illustration
you captured the essence of the conundrum in well-written phrases (and your mini t-letter alliteration)
pollution and global warning is scientifically based - unfortunately some of our political leaders think this is 'fake news'!
Very nice effort for my evening read (-:
Mark
reply by the author on 14-Jul-2019
  |
Lisa
terrific matching of verse with its illustration
you captured the essence of the conundrum in well-written phrases (and your mini t-letter alliteration)
pollution and global warning is scientifically based - unfortunately some of our political leaders think this is 'fake news'!
Very nice effort for my evening read (-:
Mark
Comment Written 14-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 14-Jul-2019
-
Thanks for this supportive review, Mark. I think those dumbass politicos have got fake brains. How can they not believe the evidence of their own eyes. They are obviously spending far too much time twittering and not reading science. Oh, can they read? I know he can't spell.
Comment from Y. M. Roger
Wow -- not only are your words a bit chilling, but that is a heckuvan ominous picture there, ma'am ! ;) A very well-crafted 5-7-5 that gives voice to atmospheric concerns! :) Thanx for that! ;) Yvette
reply by the author on 14-Jul-2019
|
Wow -- not only are your words a bit chilling, but that is a heckuvan ominous picture there, ma'am ! ;) A very well-crafted 5-7-5 that gives voice to atmospheric concerns! :) Thanx for that! ;) Yvette
Comment Written 13-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 14-Jul-2019
-
That photo reminded me of the Bhopal or Chernobyl disasters. The poem began as an anger situation in a relationship, but putting that photo with it changed the meaning to a wider one.
Comment from Colin John
Hello Lisa , yes it's terrible and it happens so much , Russia in the 70s was bad as my son is watching what happened there in Chernoble . Thanks for sharing xx
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2019
|
Hello Lisa , yes it's terrible and it happens so much , Russia in the 70s was bad as my son is watching what happened there in Chernoble . Thanks for sharing xx
Comment Written 13-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2019
-
I was thinking of Chernobyl when I saw that photo, and separately, how angry people can spew their crap onto others.
Comment from Heather Knight
This is very clever. I particularly like the title and first line.
I do hope our politicians will start doing something soon, instead of saying that climate change is not real.
Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2019
|
This is very clever. I particularly like the title and first line.
I do hope our politicians will start doing something soon, instead of saying that climate change is not real.
Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 13-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2019
-
Hi Maria
Some have been saying that for so long they have got too many people believing them, instead of believing the evidence of their own eyes. Surely it must be so OBVIOUS by now.
Comment from juliaSjames
I've been on the receiving end of a sudden vicious outburst. It stunned. Rocked me back on my heels. Like a psychic slap.
You're right, LisaMay. These outbursts release bad energy.
The final line has multiple applications as the pic indicates.
This is an excellent short write. Works as a 5-7-5 but could qualify as a senryu.
Blessings Julia
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2019
|
I've been on the receiving end of a sudden vicious outburst. It stunned. Rocked me back on my heels. Like a psychic slap.
You're right, LisaMay. These outbursts release bad energy.
The final line has multiple applications as the pic indicates.
This is an excellent short write. Works as a 5-7-5 but could qualify as a senryu.
Blessings Julia
Comment Written 12-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2019
-
That is exactly how it felt when it happened to me too... it's beyond comprehension that people can lose control like that, especially worse when someone who is supposed to love you does it.
Thanks for pointing out that it could be a senryu... that is helpful.
Comment from poetwatch
Why LisaMay what can I say. This is a very good way to express to the world as well as the rest of humanity that when one poisons the lair by blowing hot air, it make one ill with lack of breath and without breath one catches the coldness of the earth. :) Good 5-7-5.
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2019
|
Why LisaMay what can I say. This is a very good way to express to the world as well as the rest of humanity that when one poisons the lair by blowing hot air, it make one ill with lack of breath and without breath one catches the coldness of the earth. :) Good 5-7-5.
Comment Written 12-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2019
-
Taking a nice deep breath can do us all good, especially when one is angry, but there is no good in it if the air is poisoned.
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written 5-7-5 poem about someone's toxic tantrums that spew poison into the air that we are supposed to breathe in. If possible it is better to stay away from toxic people.
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2019
|
A very well-written 5-7-5 poem about someone's toxic tantrums that spew poison into the air that we are supposed to breathe in. If possible it is better to stay away from toxic people.
Comment Written 12-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2019
-
It's hard to take a deep breath and calm down when the air is poisoned. Thanks for your review.
Comment from Rachelle Allen
Is this an honest portrayal, or have the colors been altered? Because if this is real, this is absolutely horrifying. "Toxic tantrum" is right!! OY! Nicely done, LisaMay. xo
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2019
|
Is this an honest portrayal, or have the colors been altered? Because if this is real, this is absolutely horrifying. "Toxic tantrum" is right!! OY! Nicely done, LisaMay. xo
Comment Written 12-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2019
-
It's an unaltered photo of an industrial plant that was operating behind the then Iron Curtain. Unsophisticated, unlegislated, unimaginably bad air pollution.
Thanks for reviewing. Away to bed now. 3am.
-
What? Already?!! Sleep well. xo
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
You did a great job with your 575, Lisa. Your syllable count is good per line. The picture is a nice pairing, too. Your last line does double duty--poison in the environment and poison coming out of the mouth of the one saying those words. Thanks for sharing. Jan
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2019
|
You did a great job with your 575, Lisa. Your syllable count is good per line. The picture is a nice pairing, too. Your last line does double duty--poison in the environment and poison coming out of the mouth of the one saying those words. Thanks for sharing. Jan
Comment Written 12-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2019
-
Thanks for these comments, Jan. You are spot on with your summary.
Comment from RodG
Fortunately we don't have this kind of plant nearby.
I like how you personify the problem (your) and by referring to a "toxic tantrum" it might be having. Rod
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2019
|
Fortunately we don't have this kind of plant nearby.
I like how you personify the problem (your) and by referring to a "toxic tantrum" it might be having. Rod
Comment Written 12-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2019
-
It was about a person to start with then I realised it was appropriate as well to personify air pollution.
In NZ, especially down south where I am, we aren't subjected to this kind of pollution. In fact, our community protested against an aluminium smelter being built nearby and we won. It was more important to us that albatrosses came to visit and breed. I love living down here.
-
You New Zealanders really have a love for nature and I love how you have the collective power to prevent industry from destroying wildlife. Big money usually wins such battles where I live. Rod
-
We've lost out to big money in other areas. The Chinese are buying up all our dairy collectives at the moment, much to public alarm.
