The French Letter
Viewing comments for Chapter 65 "The Slaying of the Markhor Pt 1"A Novel
23 total reviews
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
You did a good job with this chapter, tony. I really enjoyed the descriptive words of the interior of the house. I was thinking by the title that this would be about something sad. Thanks for sharing. Jan
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2019
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You did a good job with this chapter, tony. I really enjoyed the descriptive words of the interior of the house. I was thinking by the title that this would be about something sad. Thanks for sharing. Jan
Comment Written 15-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2019
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Thanks for your review of this chapter, Jan. I'm glad you enjoyed the descriptions of the house. All the best, Tony
Comment from Pam (respa)
-This is a good chapter,Tony,
that shows several good scenes.
-Bisto enjoys his cigar, and
Charles senses that he
is trying to adjust to losing his wife.
-The description of Charles
opening the door to the
bedroom is quite good, and
adds a bit of levity to the chapter.
-This continues briefly the
next morning when Charles
mentions the faerie queen and
Bisto responds:
"Why don't you go and
write a poem about them..."
-Maybe a little of the
author is showing through here!
-At last, Charles settles in
with the journal and begins
to read. A good ending, leaving
a little bit of the journal, and
the rest to follow.
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2019
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-This is a good chapter,Tony,
that shows several good scenes.
-Bisto enjoys his cigar, and
Charles senses that he
is trying to adjust to losing his wife.
-The description of Charles
opening the door to the
bedroom is quite good, and
adds a bit of levity to the chapter.
-This continues briefly the
next morning when Charles
mentions the faerie queen and
Bisto responds:
"Why don't you go and
write a poem about them..."
-Maybe a little of the
author is showing through here!
-At last, Charles settles in
with the journal and begins
to read. A good ending, leaving
a little bit of the journal, and
the rest to follow.
Comment Written 15-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2019
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Thanks, Pam. There's quite a bit going on in this chapter. You may be right about the author showing through. I was thinking that nook in the corner of the library might be just the place to sit down and write poetry!
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You are welcome, Tony. I thought that might be the case; it sounded like you!
Comment from rspoet
Hello Tony,
Excellent description in this chapter; those old houses do have their own unique sounds. No wonder some think they may be haunted.
Of course, creaks sometimes lead to pleasant results.
Maybe you should re-title the book: The Mystery of the Journals,
now we have two journals, far more interesting than letters.
Excellent choice of name for the old chap: Sir Robert. Has a nice sound to it. :)
Solid introduction and chapter title The Slaying of the Markhor,
and excellent hook leading to the next chapter.
Well done.
Robert
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2019
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Hello Tony,
Excellent description in this chapter; those old houses do have their own unique sounds. No wonder some think they may be haunted.
Of course, creaks sometimes lead to pleasant results.
Maybe you should re-title the book: The Mystery of the Journals,
now we have two journals, far more interesting than letters.
Excellent choice of name for the old chap: Sir Robert. Has a nice sound to it. :)
Solid introduction and chapter title The Slaying of the Markhor,
and excellent hook leading to the next chapter.
Well done.
Robert
Comment Written 15-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2019
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I've been thinking for some time about retitling this. The main plot isn't really about the French letter any more. Glad you liked my choice of name. I thought it sounded quite distinguished!
Comment from Pearl Edwards
I felt as if I were treading on ancient ghosts, - great line really sets Charle's mood as he's climbing the stairs, a very descriptive paragraph.
Great chapter Tony, loved it,
cheers.
valda
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2019
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I felt as if I were treading on ancient ghosts, - great line really sets Charle's mood as he's climbing the stairs, a very descriptive paragraph.
Great chapter Tony, loved it,
cheers.
valda
Comment Written 15-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2019
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Thanks very much for your encouragement, Valda, and for the validation of the sixth star. You make me feel that I am on track with this part of the story. Appreciated. All the best, Tony
Comment from Gloria ....
It's been a few chapters since I've stopped in on The French Letter and I must say, Tony this part of the chapter is extremely engaging. It's a smooth read from start finish and creates such vivid imagery and tone it stays.
Terrific and now off to read about the supernatural.
Gloria
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2019
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It's been a few chapters since I've stopped in on The French Letter and I must say, Tony this part of the chapter is extremely engaging. It's a smooth read from start finish and creates such vivid imagery and tone it stays.
Terrific and now off to read about the supernatural.
Gloria
Comment Written 14-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2019
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Thanks for dropping by, Gloria. I appreciate it.
Comment from estory
I think the scene with Helen is a bit distracting from the main thrust of the chapter, but once you got into the focus on the book, the chapter started to unroll in a mysterious scroll, the air is very eerie, the old book on the table, the trophies around in the room; it sets a haunting scene. I liked how the story starts: It was the beginning of the end of my father. it really casts a shadow over this story; it's like a foreshadowing of maybe the beginning of the end of Charles. Spooky. I think if you clean up the tangets, the spurs and side roads, you will be left with a decent story. But you kind of have to decide what this is going to be; James Bond, The Lover, or Murder on the Orient Express. estory
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2019
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I think the scene with Helen is a bit distracting from the main thrust of the chapter, but once you got into the focus on the book, the chapter started to unroll in a mysterious scroll, the air is very eerie, the old book on the table, the trophies around in the room; it sets a haunting scene. I liked how the story starts: It was the beginning of the end of my father. it really casts a shadow over this story; it's like a foreshadowing of maybe the beginning of the end of Charles. Spooky. I think if you clean up the tangets, the spurs and side roads, you will be left with a decent story. But you kind of have to decide what this is going to be; James Bond, The Lover, or Murder on the Orient Express. estory
Comment Written 14-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2019
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I appreciate this review. I suspect it may be possible to reveal a worthwhile story hidden in this tangle. As you suggest, it will take some ruthless pruning and a narrower focus.
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
I think I would find that absorbing, too, Tony. There is something not quite right with Bisto, for such an old friend, he's being a bit rough on Charles. I wonder if we'll find out why. I have to say, Tony, you can tell you are a poet with the delightful descriptions you give us in your chapters, the descriptions of the sunrise in the conservatory, was lovely. :)). Well done, another interesting chapter. I'm going to Spain for ten days from this coming Monday, but if I can get a signal from the remote area I'll be staying in, I check to look for your next post. :)) Sandra xx
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2019
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I think I would find that absorbing, too, Tony. There is something not quite right with Bisto, for such an old friend, he's being a bit rough on Charles. I wonder if we'll find out why. I have to say, Tony, you can tell you are a poet with the delightful descriptions you give us in your chapters, the descriptions of the sunrise in the conservatory, was lovely. :)). Well done, another interesting chapter. I'm going to Spain for ten days from this coming Monday, but if I can get a signal from the remote area I'll be staying in, I check to look for your next post. :)) Sandra xx
Comment Written 14-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2019
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I think Bisto may be a bit touchy because of the circumstances. I hope so, anyway.
I hope all goes well with your trip to Spain.
Best wishes, Tony
Comment from Gail Denham
This chapter is very well written. I do like the paragraph about the sunrise - I could just see the scene. This does sound like a complicated story for sure - enjoyed the chapter.
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2019
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This chapter is very well written. I do like the paragraph about the sunrise - I could just see the scene. This does sound like a complicated story for sure - enjoyed the chapter.
Comment Written 14-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2019
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Thanks very much for stopping by to read and review this chapter, Gail. I appreciate your positive comments about the description and I'm delighted that you enjoyed it. Best wishes, Tony
Comment from Sophia Delgado
This is awesome! I love the way you set the creepy mood with descriptions and similes like "Treading on ancient ghosts" and wood glistening "Like freshly spilled blood". It's vivid and effective. The story has a good flow and I enjoyed reading it.
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2019
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This is awesome! I love the way you set the creepy mood with descriptions and similes like "Treading on ancient ghosts" and wood glistening "Like freshly spilled blood". It's vivid and effective. The story has a good flow and I enjoyed reading it.
Comment Written 14-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2019
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Thanks very much for stopping by to read and review this chapter, Sophia. I appreciate your positive comments and I'm delighted that you enjoyed it. Best wishes, Tony
Comment from Pantygynt
A fine chapter this that covers a great deal oground in just under 1,000 words. I particularly enjoyed the descriptive p[aragraph that begins 'I climbed the stairs with care...'. It is a rare case of showing rather than telling that does not use direct speech in doing so. We are right there climbing the stares with him.
I am in the process of going through the first draft of my novel, slicing it into chapters and posts. They are not really the same thing.
When one settles to read a novel for one's own enjoyment, on does not have to read the whole of a chapter. I frequently do not. Within the chapter there is some kind of gestalt that binds events together but we can put it down and come back later.
A post, even if FS consider it must be called a chapter and have a title of its own, needs to be much shorter since readers are going to be asked to review it. I have tried to keep my posts to round about 1,000 words, while my intended chapters are frequently three or more times that length. It is another case of horses for courses I believe.
Now I will go on to your next post.
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2019
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A fine chapter this that covers a great deal oground in just under 1,000 words. I particularly enjoyed the descriptive p[aragraph that begins 'I climbed the stairs with care...'. It is a rare case of showing rather than telling that does not use direct speech in doing so. We are right there climbing the stares with him.
I am in the process of going through the first draft of my novel, slicing it into chapters and posts. They are not really the same thing.
When one settles to read a novel for one's own enjoyment, on does not have to read the whole of a chapter. I frequently do not. Within the chapter there is some kind of gestalt that binds events together but we can put it down and come back later.
A post, even if FS consider it must be called a chapter and have a title of its own, needs to be much shorter since readers are going to be asked to review it. I have tried to keep my posts to round about 1,000 words, while my intended chapters are frequently three or more times that length. It is another case of horses for courses I believe.
Now I will go on to your next post.
Comment Written 14-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2019
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Thanks, Jim. I hope you?re enjoying your break. I know exactly what you mean about chapters. Although this is now more than 65 FS posts, it certainly won?t turn out as 65 chapters. So far, the action has covered barely two weeks. I?m considering arranging it in chunks of a day at a time.
Thanks for the sixer and comments about the descriptive passages.
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My novella has worked out as 7 parts, 24 chapters and 60 posts.
