Finding Hope
In the emotions of life, it is the brightest...6 total reviews
Comment from Richard J
Goodness!
Not since Robert Heinlein and Isaac Asimov have I read such brilliant science fiction ... are they both androids of the highest class?
Did Eil's dad(creator?) build Eli, and Eli build Danni?
Whatever the case, the scenario of your story is stunningly written in spot-on grammar, imagery, and verisimilitude the likes and detail quite extraordinarily beyond mere skill ... you're (to me) creatively unique, in that something about your manner of composing brings it all so vividly alive my mind's-eye had the sensation of actually "feeling" that which you ascribed to each character as they did.
Well, before I wear my welcome thin, let me close by thanking you for a most captivating, entertaining, and memorable piece of writing!
The best to you in winning the contest ... it will certainly be well deserved, if you do! ~ Richard : )
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2019
  |
Goodness!
Not since Robert Heinlein and Isaac Asimov have I read such brilliant science fiction ... are they both androids of the highest class?
Did Eil's dad(creator?) build Eli, and Eli build Danni?
Whatever the case, the scenario of your story is stunningly written in spot-on grammar, imagery, and verisimilitude the likes and detail quite extraordinarily beyond mere skill ... you're (to me) creatively unique, in that something about your manner of composing brings it all so vividly alive my mind's-eye had the sensation of actually "feeling" that which you ascribed to each character as they did.
Well, before I wear my welcome thin, let me close by thanking you for a most captivating, entertaining, and memorable piece of writing!
The best to you in winning the contest ... it will certainly be well deserved, if you do! ~ Richard : )
Comment Written 03-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2019
-
Thank you for the time you took to read this one, Sir Richard -- I do so appreciate it! :) Seems anything over 1000 words on FS gets a very limited number of reviews (if the author's name isn't identified) .... no one wants to take the time to read other folks' prose, just want the 'quick pay' poetry provides. :) ;) ;) This being nearly 6000 words, I'm not holding my breath on a place in the contest, but ya never know, I guess! :) ;)
Thank you again and have a great week! ;)
Comment from robyn corum
Dear Mystery Writer,
Wow. Super, super job on this storyline. I love how you took the ingredients you werer assigned and placed them so thoughtfully in the plot that they were as seamless as could be, but also integral to the story. Fab job - nice, nice, nice! The characters were very entertaining and seemed real and I enjoyed every word. Thanks and good luck!
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2019
 |
Dear Mystery Writer,
Wow. Super, super job on this storyline. I love how you took the ingredients you werer assigned and placed them so thoughtfully in the plot that they were as seamless as could be, but also integral to the story. Fab job - nice, nice, nice! The characters were very entertaining and seemed real and I enjoyed every word. Thanks and good luck!
Comment Written 02-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2019
-
Thank you for your enthusiastic review - means a lot! :-)
Comment from Scarbrems
An impressively creative take on the brief. The fact that Danni was, in fact, not human, was unfolded, rather than revealed, and that takes a lot of skill. At first, I honestly thought she had a possessive husband.
I'm not sure who you are, mystery writer, but the way you write is definitely more high-end sci-fi, not dissimilar to the Asimov you named the cat after. Your scenes of sexual connection where not tacky pornographic material, but revelatory of a deep connection between man and, we later learn, machine.
Good job. This could easily be worked up into a novella. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2019
|
An impressively creative take on the brief. The fact that Danni was, in fact, not human, was unfolded, rather than revealed, and that takes a lot of skill. At first, I honestly thought she had a possessive husband.
I'm not sure who you are, mystery writer, but the way you write is definitely more high-end sci-fi, not dissimilar to the Asimov you named the cat after. Your scenes of sexual connection where not tacky pornographic material, but revelatory of a deep connection between man and, we later learn, machine.
Good job. This could easily be worked up into a novella. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 01-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2019
-
Thank you so very much, Emma, for this wonderful and detailed review -- such a wonderful surprise and great start to my week! ;) ;) And I'm so very glad you enjoyed Danni and Eli (oh, and Az!!)... they, as with all of my fantasy characters, are special and need to be shared with the world!! :) ;) ;) ;) Thanx for allowing me to share them with you -- have a great week! ;)
Comment from Cass Carlton
It took a while for me to realize that Dannielle was non human, so when I worked that out I went back and read it again. That made a big difference, and gave the story more impact and meaning. At first Eli comes across a
control freak, but not for long. He seems a really nice guy madly in love with his non human lover, but the last lines are quite a shock. Eli, too is a non human creation, but no one knows. Surprise surprise!! The question arises, do we really know who (or what) we take for granted in out lives? Are they real or artificial. No one knows except the man who made them.
And even he might have wheels and cogs instead of flesh and blood. OOoh! spookee! cheers Cass
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2019
|
It took a while for me to realize that Dannielle was non human, so when I worked that out I went back and read it again. That made a big difference, and gave the story more impact and meaning. At first Eli comes across a
control freak, but not for long. He seems a really nice guy madly in love with his non human lover, but the last lines are quite a shock. Eli, too is a non human creation, but no one knows. Surprise surprise!! The question arises, do we really know who (or what) we take for granted in out lives? Are they real or artificial. No one knows except the man who made them.
And even he might have wheels and cogs instead of flesh and blood. OOoh! spookee! cheers Cass
Comment Written 01-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2019
-
LOL! Spookeeee indeed, Cass! :) So glad you enjoyed Danni and Eli -- as do all of my characters, they found their own place in my big fantasy heart and I do my best to introduce them to the world! :) ;) Thank you for this lovely, detailed review -- you have no idea how much it and those stars mean to me! :) Here's wishing you a wonderful week ahead - take care! ;)
Comment from Lori S.
Awesome. Loved everything about it! Well written, smart and technical, but didn't talk down to the reader. Loved the twist at the end! Although there were hints along the way, you had me caught up looking at her! I just didn't look hard enough at him! Excellent job!
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2019
|
Awesome. Loved everything about it! Well written, smart and technical, but didn't talk down to the reader. Loved the twist at the end! Although there were hints along the way, you had me caught up looking at her! I just didn't look hard enough at him! Excellent job!
Comment Written 01-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2019
-
Oh, I am so very glad that you enjoyed Danni and Eli -- you have no idea how much those stars mean!! :) Was a little nervous on their reception, but once my brain coalesced on the implementation of the 'crazy prompts' for this one, there was no turning back...... the Muse Rules! ;);) Thank you for such a lovely review and may you have a wonderful week ahead! :)
Comment from karenina
I think I've been fooling myself. I had delusions that I could write a bit...dabble in poetry with an occasional tip toe into flash fiction (when no one was looking)---and then I see what you have accomplished with this "scenario" and really? Someone should take all writing (and other sharp instruments) away and set me in the corner with blocks. --Karenina
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2019
|
I think I've been fooling myself. I had delusions that I could write a bit...dabble in poetry with an occasional tip toe into flash fiction (when no one was looking)---and then I see what you have accomplished with this "scenario" and really? Someone should take all writing (and other sharp instruments) away and set me in the corner with blocks. --Karenina
Comment Written 31-May-2019
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2019
-
Well, Karenina, you humble me with this response -- thank you for such a lovely critique! :) And I am so very glad you enjoyed Danni and Eli... when I first got those 'prompts' I was like "Whaaaaaaaaaat....?" LOL! :) ;) But then, they came knocking at imagination's door! :) ;) Take care and have a great week ahead! ;)
-
Yes. You demonstrated true skill and writing prowess...I can aspire to it...or I can take up knitting! (smile)--Karenina
