A Light in the Darkness
Viewing comments for Chapter 1 "The Assignment"Young rookie detective is assigned a serial case
13 total reviews
Comment from royowen
I'm presuming this is episodic dear Rox. It starts off innocuously enough, but then becomes very exciting, the thought of being kidnapped or to be forcefully removed is apparently not uncommon, some are never found. Well done Rox, excellent story, blessings, Roy
Typo : Manicured law(n)s and gardens. 2: (than) an arm and a leg. Then?
reply by the author on 13-May-2019
  |
I'm presuming this is episodic dear Rox. It starts off innocuously enough, but then becomes very exciting, the thought of being kidnapped or to be forcefully removed is apparently not uncommon, some are never found. Well done Rox, excellent story, blessings, Roy
Typo : Manicured law(n)s and gardens. 2: (than) an arm and a leg. Then?
Comment Written 13-May-2019
reply by the author on 13-May-2019
-
Thank you sir and for catching my boo boos. =} Rox
-
My pleasure
Comment from Liz O'Neill
I like your foreshadowing and the "we'll show them" message: "They held out little hope, especially when they heard the cases had been given to a rookie." Rookie being the operative label. I hear a "moo-ha-ha" in the future. You draw the reader in o identify when they read this line: "Yeah, I know. I do too, but you gotta have a life outside of this," his hand motion encompassed the room. "Or you'll go crazy." Too many do not heed that cautionary tale in many lines of work and/or service. No kidding. I can't tell you how many dreams I have with the main issue being that I don't have any bullets! You have a great plot going and the ending makes the reader want to read more.
reply by the author on 13-May-2019
|
I like your foreshadowing and the "we'll show them" message: "They held out little hope, especially when they heard the cases had been given to a rookie." Rookie being the operative label. I hear a "moo-ha-ha" in the future. You draw the reader in o identify when they read this line: "Yeah, I know. I do too, but you gotta have a life outside of this," his hand motion encompassed the room. "Or you'll go crazy." Too many do not heed that cautionary tale in many lines of work and/or service. No kidding. I can't tell you how many dreams I have with the main issue being that I don't have any bullets! You have a great plot going and the ending makes the reader want to read more.
Comment Written 13-May-2019
reply by the author on 13-May-2019
-
Thanks so much. =] Rox
Comment from Ulla
Hi Roxanna, this is a great start to your new detective book. I certainly hope that Rachel is not being a victim to the crime spree that she's been working on to solve. Don't wait too long with the continuation. All the best. Ulla:)))
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 13-May-2019
|
Hi Roxanna, this is a great start to your new detective book. I certainly hope that Rachel is not being a victim to the crime spree that she's been working on to solve. Don't wait too long with the continuation. All the best. Ulla:)))
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 13-May-2019
reply by the author on 13-May-2019
-
I'll try to get the next posted ASAP, I just have to do a lot of review to get money. ={ Thanks always the catch. =} Thanks so much dear. Rox
