Non-Existence
Nothing is here and time is gone17 total reviews
Comment from MIKE C
It is good but you need to explain the character more. I took me twice reading it to understand what you were trying to say,but not bad keep it up.you Had a strong character and scene but I am lost why he didn't see his parent's
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reply by the author on 24-Jun-2019
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It is good but you need to explain the character more. I took me twice reading it to understand what you were trying to say,but not bad keep it up.you Had a strong character and scene but I am lost why he didn't see his parent's
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 24-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2019
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Thank you!
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
I enjoyed your contest entry, Raul. Good job with the prompt. Your words aptly describe a time that one seems to be in limbo--not sure of what is happening at first, then realizing what is happening to his relief. Good job nd best wishes. Jan
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2019
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I enjoyed your contest entry, Raul. Good job with the prompt. Your words aptly describe a time that one seems to be in limbo--not sure of what is happening at first, then realizing what is happening to his relief. Good job nd best wishes. Jan
Comment Written 24-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2019
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Thank you! I am so happy that you enjoyed my story!
Comment from James W. Reynolds
This is an intriguing story. I like the dream-like quality of it, and the uncertainty over what is real and what isn't. The disconcerting start makes me wonder how real the end is or whether it is just part of the dream. Nice work.
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2019
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This is an intriguing story. I like the dream-like quality of it, and the uncertainty over what is real and what isn't. The disconcerting start makes me wonder how real the end is or whether it is just part of the dream. Nice work.
Comment Written 24-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2019
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Thank you! I am so happy that you enjoyed my story!
Comment from shaffer40
Far out. I like this Twilight Zone type story. It is sad but eerie at the same time. If I understand it, the kid's dreaming and can't wait to wake up. It looks like you've had some successes in your writing. Well done.
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2019
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Far out. I like this Twilight Zone type story. It is sad but eerie at the same time. If I understand it, the kid's dreaming and can't wait to wake up. It looks like you've had some successes in your writing. Well done.
Comment Written 23-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2019
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Thank you! I am so happy that you enjoyed my story!
Comment from marion
Hi Raul 1
I am not quite sure what your story is about. Like I am missing something. I feel it should be a little clearer although it is well written, with no SPAG. I note your notes, but do feel that a story should stand alone and be a little bit stronger without additional notes to give the reader better insight.
Marion
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2019
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Hi Raul 1
I am not quite sure what your story is about. Like I am missing something. I feel it should be a little clearer although it is well written, with no SPAG. I note your notes, but do feel that a story should stand alone and be a little bit stronger without additional notes to give the reader better insight.
Marion
Comment Written 23-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2019
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Thank you!
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
This sounds much like depression when people can't cope with life and they are beset by blank starts and a thoughtless world, an interesting write Raul, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2019
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This sounds much like depression when people can't cope with life and they are beset by blank starts and a thoughtless world, an interesting write Raul, love Dolly x
Comment Written 22-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2019
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Thank you! I am so happy that you enjoyed my story!
Comment from Poetic Friend
Wow, this is good, Thank God, he was just dreaming (or should I say having a nightmare).
Unfortunately, sometimes we can be among friends and family and still feel alone or non-existing.
That's a subject for your next flash fiction, which you write well.
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2019
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Wow, this is good, Thank God, he was just dreaming (or should I say having a nightmare).
Unfortunately, sometimes we can be among friends and family and still feel alone or non-existing.
That's a subject for your next flash fiction, which you write well.
Comment Written 22-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2019
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You're welcome! I am so happy that you enjoyed my story!
Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear
This story has a reality experience, taletelling is nice, sometime we feel non-existence, loneliness or losing state, we wake up and find existence, well said, well done. Write-Inspire-Change --DR ALCREATOR
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2019
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This story has a reality experience, taletelling is nice, sometime we feel non-existence, loneliness or losing state, we wake up and find existence, well said, well done. Write-Inspire-Change --DR ALCREATOR
Comment Written 20-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2019
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Thank you! I am so happy that you enjoyed my story!
Comment from the13thpoet
That was a good job. It is hard to tell a story under the constraints off so few words. I commend you for even trying and the effort is worth applause. Good luck in the contest and keep writing and keep sharing.
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2019
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That was a good job. It is hard to tell a story under the constraints off so few words. I commend you for even trying and the effort is worth applause. Good luck in the contest and keep writing and keep sharing.
Comment Written 20-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2019
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Thank you! I am so happy that you enjoyed my story!
Comment from Janilou
Well, now, this was an interesting flash fiction indeed. Time is a fascinating subject. I like "What if" scenarios.
I found no errors or edits needed.
Well done.
All the best,
Jan
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2019
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Well, now, this was an interesting flash fiction indeed. Time is a fascinating subject. I like "What if" scenarios.
I found no errors or edits needed.
Well done.
All the best,
Jan
Comment Written 20-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2019
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Thank you! I am so happy that you enjoyed my story!
