Lamentations of a Lost Laddy
Viewing comments for Chapter 16 "Life After North Side Recovery"My Autobiography
4 total reviews
Comment from Bucketlist
Wow, such a trauma packed life! I am glad you decided to go to rehab. You have turned your life around (my own impression) against higher odds. How you cope with rejection and your past addiction, I don't know. Many people sink into bigger problems instead of rising above, I'm sure you have a good therapist behind you, continue to use your intelligent mind for joy
Hugs, Trish
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2019
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Wow, such a trauma packed life! I am glad you decided to go to rehab. You have turned your life around (my own impression) against higher odds. How you cope with rejection and your past addiction, I don't know. Many people sink into bigger problems instead of rising above, I'm sure you have a good therapist behind you, continue to use your intelligent mind for joy
Hugs, Trish
Comment Written 21-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2019
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Thanks so much I appreciate your comments and hugs, yes my therapist Mark mender is fabulous but as things turn out come to me my own best therapist God my own best counsel. As it is being a friend and fellowshipping with you I have to be honest and let you know that I've jumped back out to do more research. I'm functional right now, and I'm more content than I've ever been in my life. Please keep me in your prayers thanks so much
Comment from Liz O'Neill
What a turnaround in life. The promises in the AA Big Book say that a lot of our fears will be lessened. It is amazing how our perspective can change when we have clear thinking. We begin to take responsibility for our choices and to take care of ourselves. I used to work at an abuse prevention agency. The law enforcement system is very short-minded when it comes to men being abused. I'm sorry you had to go through that. This very heartfelt and will clearly draw many readers in.
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2019
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What a turnaround in life. The promises in the AA Big Book say that a lot of our fears will be lessened. It is amazing how our perspective can change when we have clear thinking. We begin to take responsibility for our choices and to take care of ourselves. I used to work at an abuse prevention agency. The law enforcement system is very short-minded when it comes to men being abused. I'm sorry you had to go through that. This very heartfelt and will clearly draw many readers in.
Comment Written 31-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2019
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Thanks so much for those I really appreciate your comments. Wonder of You Were when in depth, and you showed me how to restructure the sentence a little bit so I have edited it just a bit and sounded a lot better. Thanks again,
Blessings
Brother Badger
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I would be happy to. Guide you in any way you would like. What do you have in mind?
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Grounding and we'll learn to shut shackle my inner child without blocking him
Blessings &Hugs,
Brother Badger cull
Darren. < : - D ~
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Darren, feel free to contact am anytime. If you prefer email, mine is
rcwnsliz@hotmail.com
Comment from Gail Denham
I don't know you sir - but I'm so very proud of you for helping people - putting up with the grief of folks still on the drugs forgiving others for all the stuff that you've been through. May God bless you and help you every single day.
and Thank you so much for sharing this in-depth look at some of what those going through addiction withdrawal must face. one of our grandson's went through one place like this - I used to bring his groceries - now he's married, owns and operates a tremendous business. God took care of him.
God bless you.
reply by the author on 31-Mar-2019
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I don't know you sir - but I'm so very proud of you for helping people - putting up with the grief of folks still on the drugs forgiving others for all the stuff that you've been through. May God bless you and help you every single day.
and Thank you so much for sharing this in-depth look at some of what those going through addiction withdrawal must face. one of our grandson's went through one place like this - I used to bring his groceries - now he's married, owns and operates a tremendous business. God took care of him.
God bless you.
Comment Written 31-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 31-Mar-2019
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Thanks girl I really appreciate your warm review I will be editing as Peugeot owner of your suggestions. Thanks so much for your generous of you and thanks so much for your fellowship here it means a lot to me.
Blessings,
Brother Badger
Darren
Comment from shaffer40
Hi Badger_29, I commend you for your strength of character and your journey, which you have taken in the right direction. This is a good story that could serve as an example for others.
I have made a lot of suggestions -- word changes and sentence structure. I have been published quite a bit and have done a lot of editing, and I hope my changes will guide you in your writing.
**************
You use the name "Chrisy," "Christy," and "Christie." I'm assuming it's "Christy" and
have used that throughout. You can change if it's wrong.
Extra space before first word: "After"
Suggest omitting "I".
After a few glitches, I found a North Side recovery and thanked my higher
power.
Sentence not clear: The whole property consists of a half an acre on Plaza
Avenue is the main structure and there are five cottages out back on Bowles
Street.
Suggest: The property consists of half an acre on Plaza Avenue. Behind the main
structure are five cottages that face Bowles Street, built by Bill and Patty
Breen and set amidst a peaceful court with grass, trees, and a hammock.
A locked gate in front feigns security.
Suggest: At first I lived in the main structure, but when the Breens decided to sell
and found a buyer I rented a room. When their sale fell through and
knowing that I was reliable, they invited me to rent one of the back cottages,
which had been my dream all along.
After Kurt left I had a couple of interesting roommates that were supposed to be
all about recovery, but they ended up getting high and moving out.
Suggest: In May 2018 I moved into the cottage with roommates Curtis Brown and
Michael Levy. Things went well for a while, until Michael was expelled,
leaving only Curtis and me. Unfortunately, Curtis suffered from
schizophrenia and, when someone slipped him a drug--maybe ecstasy--
which fried his brain, he was unable to handle babysitting and working at
the same time and was also expelled. His replacements, two men
supposedly in recovery, regularly got high and didn't last long.
Suggest: Patty then placed her daughter, Christy, and her boyfriend in the unit,
which was challenging, because there was conflict between Christy and me.
Even though her boyfriend sided with me, he was gone most of the time. I
wrote the following account of an incident that occurred there on May 4,
2018, at 1630.[You might want to use regular time, since not everyone
understands the service time.]
Suggest: I was in my room when I heard Christy crying. I went to her door and
asked if she needed help or someone to talk to, or maybe just a hug. She
responded by going into a rage. She first grabbed me around the neck and
clawed at my chest, all the while ordering me out of her house. I ran to my
room and locked the door, but she kicked it open and pulled me into the
kitchen, pushed me to the floor, and began hitting me with a broom. I
deflected the blows as much as I could. She was incredibly strong!
Suggest: I called 911 emergency and reported that my roommate was assaulting
me. The police arrived and talked to the two of us. The officer commended
me for remaining calm throughout the ordeal. Patty Breen offered to take her
daughter home for the evening, but she refused to go her mother's home or
to the hospital. Since she wouldn't leave, I went next door to stay with
neighbors to be safe and to prevent any further confrontations.
Suggest: When showering that evening I counted at least six scratches on my
chest. I photographed them and have included the photo in this file.
Suggest: Christy has assaulted me on two more occasions since then, once on May
7th and again on May 14th. Each time I called the police. After the second
assault, an officer told Christy that she should spend the night with her
mother, but DID NOT ESCORT her there, leaving me in fear of her
returning and possibly attacking me again. As a result of this trauma [Not
sure what this means; you might want to change wording] "my doctor's office
one Community Health" paid my rent for the rest of May and found me a
room further up in Del Paso Heights." [Not sure what "making Social Security
and working" means. You might want to change wording].
Suggest: I now have great roommates. We all get along. Peter is a retired Sprint car
driver and is knowledgeable in a number of areas, including mechanics. He
and his wife are both about ten years older than I, which has made living
there both challenging and rewarding.
Suggest new paragraph: Initially, we clashed, but our arguments ultimately made
us closer. Peter now tells me regularly that he loves me and that he's glad I'm
there. He has diabetes and other health problems, and Kathy has had a
couple of strokes and is pretty much bedridden. I do a lot of caretaking for
them, and since their Social Security has been cut, I use my resources for
groceries--and their nicotine habit. (I kicked the habit over a month ago.)
Since cooking is my main trade, I fix meals for them, and they enjoy that.
Peter does some cooking, and this is good because we have a gas oven and
stove.[Not clear why the gas oven and stove make that good. You might want
to clarify.]
Suggest: It says in the Good Book that wherever you are you will flourish and
prosper. This is my opportunity to let my light shine so that I can be a
positive influence wherever I go. Sure, I have my ups and downs, but
throughout all of this, God has protected, guided, blessed, and cultivated me
for His purpose.
Suggest: I'm grateful [omit "very"--usually weakens image] to the managers here
where I live for the way they have helped me. They provided me with a bike
when mine was stolen and a guitar when mine broke--all material for another
story.
Suggest: May you continue to be blessed in your endeavors and thankful for
whatever blessings you have, for gratitude is the first step toward humility.
The Good Book tells us that he who exalts himself shall be humbled, and he
who humbles himself shall be exalted.
Comma follows 2019 in final sentence.
reply by the author on 31-Mar-2019
|
Hi Badger_29, I commend you for your strength of character and your journey, which you have taken in the right direction. This is a good story that could serve as an example for others.
I have made a lot of suggestions -- word changes and sentence structure. I have been published quite a bit and have done a lot of editing, and I hope my changes will guide you in your writing.
**************
You use the name "Chrisy," "Christy," and "Christie." I'm assuming it's "Christy" and
have used that throughout. You can change if it's wrong.
Extra space before first word: "After"
Suggest omitting "I".
After a few glitches, I found a North Side recovery and thanked my higher
power.
Sentence not clear: The whole property consists of a half an acre on Plaza
Avenue is the main structure and there are five cottages out back on Bowles
Street.
Suggest: The property consists of half an acre on Plaza Avenue. Behind the main
structure are five cottages that face Bowles Street, built by Bill and Patty
Breen and set amidst a peaceful court with grass, trees, and a hammock.
A locked gate in front feigns security.
Suggest: At first I lived in the main structure, but when the Breens decided to sell
and found a buyer I rented a room. When their sale fell through and
knowing that I was reliable, they invited me to rent one of the back cottages,
which had been my dream all along.
After Kurt left I had a couple of interesting roommates that were supposed to be
all about recovery, but they ended up getting high and moving out.
Suggest: In May 2018 I moved into the cottage with roommates Curtis Brown and
Michael Levy. Things went well for a while, until Michael was expelled,
leaving only Curtis and me. Unfortunately, Curtis suffered from
schizophrenia and, when someone slipped him a drug--maybe ecstasy--
which fried his brain, he was unable to handle babysitting and working at
the same time and was also expelled. His replacements, two men
supposedly in recovery, regularly got high and didn't last long.
Suggest: Patty then placed her daughter, Christy, and her boyfriend in the unit,
which was challenging, because there was conflict between Christy and me.
Even though her boyfriend sided with me, he was gone most of the time. I
wrote the following account of an incident that occurred there on May 4,
2018, at 1630.[You might want to use regular time, since not everyone
understands the service time.]
Suggest: I was in my room when I heard Christy crying. I went to her door and
asked if she needed help or someone to talk to, or maybe just a hug. She
responded by going into a rage. She first grabbed me around the neck and
clawed at my chest, all the while ordering me out of her house. I ran to my
room and locked the door, but she kicked it open and pulled me into the
kitchen, pushed me to the floor, and began hitting me with a broom. I
deflected the blows as much as I could. She was incredibly strong!
Suggest: I called 911 emergency and reported that my roommate was assaulting
me. The police arrived and talked to the two of us. The officer commended
me for remaining calm throughout the ordeal. Patty Breen offered to take her
daughter home for the evening, but she refused to go her mother's home or
to the hospital. Since she wouldn't leave, I went next door to stay with
neighbors to be safe and to prevent any further confrontations.
Suggest: When showering that evening I counted at least six scratches on my
chest. I photographed them and have included the photo in this file.
Suggest: Christy has assaulted me on two more occasions since then, once on May
7th and again on May 14th. Each time I called the police. After the second
assault, an officer told Christy that she should spend the night with her
mother, but DID NOT ESCORT her there, leaving me in fear of her
returning and possibly attacking me again. As a result of this trauma [Not
sure what this means; you might want to change wording] "my doctor's office
one Community Health" paid my rent for the rest of May and found me a
room further up in Del Paso Heights." [Not sure what "making Social Security
and working" means. You might want to change wording].
Suggest: I now have great roommates. We all get along. Peter is a retired Sprint car
driver and is knowledgeable in a number of areas, including mechanics. He
and his wife are both about ten years older than I, which has made living
there both challenging and rewarding.
Suggest new paragraph: Initially, we clashed, but our arguments ultimately made
us closer. Peter now tells me regularly that he loves me and that he's glad I'm
there. He has diabetes and other health problems, and Kathy has had a
couple of strokes and is pretty much bedridden. I do a lot of caretaking for
them, and since their Social Security has been cut, I use my resources for
groceries--and their nicotine habit. (I kicked the habit over a month ago.)
Since cooking is my main trade, I fix meals for them, and they enjoy that.
Peter does some cooking, and this is good because we have a gas oven and
stove.[Not clear why the gas oven and stove make that good. You might want
to clarify.]
Suggest: It says in the Good Book that wherever you are you will flourish and
prosper. This is my opportunity to let my light shine so that I can be a
positive influence wherever I go. Sure, I have my ups and downs, but
throughout all of this, God has protected, guided, blessed, and cultivated me
for His purpose.
Suggest: I'm grateful [omit "very"--usually weakens image] to the managers here
where I live for the way they have helped me. They provided me with a bike
when mine was stolen and a guitar when mine broke--all material for another
story.
Suggest: May you continue to be blessed in your endeavors and thankful for
whatever blessings you have, for gratitude is the first step toward humility.
The Good Book tells us that he who exalts himself shall be humbled, and he
who humbles himself shall be exalted.
Comma follows 2019 in final sentence.
Comment Written 31-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 31-Mar-2019
-
Thank you so much for a great rating on a piece of needed work and for your extensive help with this review. You have really gone out of your way to give me a very detailed review and all of your comments and suggestions are very appreciated. I kind of threw this one together because I wanted to post it and realized it probably had some I can't tell you how much I appreciate your help.
Blessings,
Brother Badger
Darren
-
You're welcome. I'm glad you are pleased with the corrections. And, I'm pleased that you nominated me as a good reviewer. Take care, and continued progress in your journey.
-
Peace ~
