Comment from JDRBAR

Excellent

For a flash fiction you really pulled me into this. I think you need to expand on it LOL. What's scary is that with all the technology they listen to today, out kids just might start talking like that one day. Arrrggghhh! Great job.

 Comment Written 18-Mar-2019

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reply by the author on 18-Mar-2019

Thank you for the great review.

Comment from JudyE

Excellent

This is a great entry and should do well. Sometimes it's hard for adults to 'play' with children. We so often get it wrong but not to worry - the kids will always set us straight. I don't have any suggestions. Thanks for sharing.

 Comment Written 17-Mar-2019

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reply by the author on 17-Mar-2019

Thanks, Judy

Comment from BeasPeas

Excellent

That's one way to get kids involved in governance. I enjoyed this amusing story and the fantastic image to accompany it. Sounds as if dad is below his pay grade. Marilyn

 Comment Written 16-Mar-2019

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reply by the author on 17-Mar-2019

Thanks, Marilyn

Comment from 24chas

Excellent

This was too funny, Bill. I can picture this happening and laughing my butt off. I love the ending to it. Shadow government, indeed. Great write, keep it up.

 Comment Written 16-Mar-2019

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reply by the author on 16-Mar-2019

Thank you, Chas

Comment from susand3022

Excellent

Oh My goodness Bill, You're hysterical! To think... a little girl playing with dolls organizing a bloodless coup! LOL I love it! Actually I'm not too sure it's all that far off! The things kids are learning in Kindergarden today will astound you compared with the things we learned when we were there!

 Comment Written 16-Mar-2019

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reply by the author on 16-Mar-2019

Thank you, Susan. Yes, they are quite precocious now.

Comment from Ulla

Excellent

hahahah, Bill that is a clever little flash story. So the kid takes us all by surprise as so switched on. I like it a lot and I hope it will do well in the contest. All the best. Ulla:)))

 Comment Written 16-Mar-2019

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reply by the author on 16-Mar-2019

Thank you, Ulla.

Comment from Marlene Shinn Lewis

Excellent

What fun--a great read! Hmm, wonder if that's how some of our tyrants got their start? Should we revisit the kinds of toys kids have? How about a ball--what could they do with a ball?! Well written.

 Comment Written 16-Mar-2019

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reply by the author on 16-Mar-2019

They were My Little Ponies. Hope they're not too dangerous. : )

Comment from Scarbrems

Excellent

Ha ha, out of the mouths of babes, eh? I loved this. It all starts off perfectly sensibly; a little girl talking about her toys like they do. Then there's a, 'what'd she say?' moment - 'She and Pinky Pie are plotting a bloodless coup.'

I wonder if little Adolf sat with his toy soldiers and played 'invading Poland'? Great stuff, good luck in the contest.

 Comment Written 16-Mar-2019

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reply by the author on 16-Mar-2019

Thanks, Sarkems. She was playing with these toys and told me their names. She is quite precocious for three, though I may have embellished her plans for their future.

Comment from Earl Corp

Exceptional

This is hilarious. I can't believe that this only used 150 words. It seemed much bigger, you packed a lot into it. You have my vote. Good luck in the contest.

 Comment Written 15-Mar-2019

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reply by the author on 15-Mar-2019

Thanks, Earl

Comment from F. Wehr3

Excellent

Very nice work on this flash fiction piece, Bill. I thought Emily's dialogue was hilarious. Good luck!

I found some minor spacing areas.

"Yes.They

You're having

government takes

Take care,
Russell

 Comment Written 15-Mar-2019

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reply by the author on 15-Mar-2019

Thanks, Russell.