The Lone Survivor
Will I make it?26 total reviews
Comment from Roxanna Andrews
Oh man! What a relief that it was just a movie or TV show. I really thought it was the end of you there for a minute. =} This is very well done, well written and I see no errors. I hope you win. Rox
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2019
  |
Oh man! What a relief that it was just a movie or TV show. I really thought it was the end of you there for a minute. =} This is very well done, well written and I see no errors. I hope you win. Rox
Comment Written 19-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2019
-
Than you, Rox. I appreciate the encouraging and excellent review. I had fun with this and trying to gravitate to shorter pieces because of my eyesight. This was a ton of fun and helps me to be more concise in my writing, too.
All my best,
Sal xo
Comment from Michele Harber
You got me as I got you. Very well done! I admire your use of detail in your description, and that you make us aware of the plane crash without ever mentioning it but, rather, by describing its aftermath. Good luck in the contest. I'm always glad to have worthy competition.
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2019
|
You got me as I got you. Very well done! I admire your use of detail in your description, and that you make us aware of the plane crash without ever mentioning it but, rather, by describing its aftermath. Good luck in the contest. I'm always glad to have worthy competition.
Comment Written 18-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2019
-
Thank you, dear Michelle. I appreciate the excellent review and helpful feedback. You are such a kind and dear reviewer.
All my best,
Sal xo
-
It's my pleasure, and thank you just as much for those very kind words.
Comment from humpwhistle
Nice job, Sally. I like the gritty determination of the survivor.
I wonder, though, how the words or thoughts of the survivor--aside from the opening line--are conveyed on film? Monologue? Narration? Subtitles?
Just a thought.
Best of luck.
Peace, Lee
reply by the author on 18-Mar-2019
|
Nice job, Sally. I like the gritty determination of the survivor.
I wonder, though, how the words or thoughts of the survivor--aside from the opening line--are conveyed on film? Monologue? Narration? Subtitles?
Just a thought.
Best of luck.
Peace, Lee
Comment Written 18-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 18-Mar-2019
-
Thank you, Lee. I always value your opinion and advice. I chose the element of surprise above all else. Our readers seem to be preferring shorter works these days and I thought I would give it a try. My eyesight is also in decline and shorter works have become more appealing to me, as well. I will look and see what I can do with the word count for the contest.
Thank you, again. I appreciate your excellent review and critique.
All my best,
Sally :+)
-
I'm sorry about your troubles, Sally. My concern isn't about word count. And I'm probably being a stickler, but your story mixes first-person narrative with a movie set. There can be no first-person narrative in a movie unless it's narrated. Again, I know I'm being a stickler, but that's why we review.
Listen, Sally, if no one else sees a problem, either do I. L
-
Okay, I see where you are coming from. Hopefully, the contest critics will see this strictly as a ?gotcha? write. No worries if they don?t. I had fun with all of it and my reviewers have been so surprised by the ending :+)
Comment from meeshu
you just scripted a Jeep commercial for the future. advertisers seem to be heading in that direction. the building tension in your write is palatable. nice job, Sal............................meeshu
reply by the author on 18-Mar-2019
|
you just scripted a Jeep commercial for the future. advertisers seem to be heading in that direction. the building tension in your write is palatable. nice job, Sal............................meeshu
Comment Written 18-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 18-Mar-2019
-
Thank you so much, Gary. I drove off the cliff for sure with this one. I had fun though. I think I took a few of my readers with me. Flash fiction is my new endeavor as my eyesight it?s taken another turn. Longer pieces are getting harder to write, read and edit. I enjoy writing so much, and I am sure to find something I can turn my pen to.
All my best with many thanks?
Sal :+)
-
I have personal empathy for you Sal. after three surgeries for a detached retina, reading for too long is a guaranteed Migraine. we both can feel for Burgess Meredith, I think. (obscure reference alert).
-
You are in my prayers! How recent was this?
-
it happened on July 4th, 2017. I was minding my own business when half the world went black.
-
I am so thankful you are better now. I take a low dose of seizure medication for my migraines. It helps most of the time but not always. If I am out in the sun too long, the headaches are horrendous.
-
I carry Rizatriptan at all times. it works if I catch it in time but makes me sleepy for about 36 hrs. no joke.
Comment from 24chas
This was a great little read, Sally. I enjoyed the flow of it and I thought it was going to be a story about the protagonist eating their leg to survive. Nice ending. Good job.
reply by the author on 18-Mar-2019
|
This was a great little read, Sally. I enjoyed the flow of it and I thought it was going to be a story about the protagonist eating their leg to survive. Nice ending. Good job.
Comment Written 18-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 18-Mar-2019
-
Thank you so much, dear Chas. I am glad you were with me to the last scene. I had fun with this and had many readers to the end! So glad you like.
All my best,
Sal :+)
Comment from Mustang Patty
Hi, Sally,
A good entry for the 100-Word Flash Fiction contest. The use of a movie set for the twist was well chosen. I think you did a good job with the dilemma presented for the main character.
Good luck to you in the contest,
~patty~
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2019
|
Hi, Sally,
A good entry for the 100-Word Flash Fiction contest. The use of a movie set for the twist was well chosen. I think you did a good job with the dilemma presented for the main character.
Good luck to you in the contest,
~patty~
Comment Written 14-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2019
-
Thank you so much, Patty. I am glad you liked it. These shorter pieces are so much fun for me! I am becoming more concise in my writing thanks to these flash fiction contests,.
All my best,
Sal :+)
Comment from Sugarray77
hey, hey, Sal.... yes, you got me. I thought for sure they were dead and we were witnesses to a bloody and cruel death. Way to go and good luck on the 100 Word Flash.
Melissa
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2019
|
hey, hey, Sal.... yes, you got me. I thought for sure they were dead and we were witnesses to a bloody and cruel death. Way to go and good luck on the 100 Word Flash.
Melissa
Comment Written 14-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2019
-
I have succeeded mightily if I got you! So glad you li,e. I appreciate the review and kind comments, as always.
All my best,
Sal xo
-
So fun, Sal... I would mention that I went on your status page looking for the FS entry that said you placed in the FS Monthly Story contest... I could not find it. Let me say, here and now, WELL DONE. Great story.. and a well deserved award. Melissa
-
Thank you, Melissa. I was in the Monthly Story for February with, ?My True Wealth.? I won second place. In January, I won first with, ?Love Letter on a Napkin.? Maybe you got them confused, but I appreciate your support and kind encouragement. Thanks again...
Comment from Kathleen Washnis
Oh this was really good! You did get me! LOL! Great artwork to go with your flash fiction contest. It would make a good survivor story for television, that's for sure!
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2019
|
Oh this was really good! You did get me! LOL! Great artwork to go with your flash fiction contest. It would make a good survivor story for television, that's for sure!
Comment Written 13-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2019
-
Thank you my dear Kathleen. I?m so glad you liked it the most of all I?m so glad I got you! Thank you so much for the excellent review and for stopping by. My husband says my dramatic skills played into this one big time.
All my best, Sally xo
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
You are clever, Sally. I did not see that coming. I enjoyed your little story. Good job with the descriptive words in creating great imagery. Thanks for sharing and best wishes. Jan
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2019
|
You are clever, Sally. I did not see that coming. I enjoyed your little story. Good job with the descriptive words in creating great imagery. Thanks for sharing and best wishes. Jan
Comment Written 13-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2019
-
Thank you, dear Jan, for the review and kind comments. I am enjoying these short pieces more and more these days. So glad you like.
All my best,
Sal :+)
Comment from GWinterwin
Enjoyed this short story about being a lone survivor. Good beginning to a longer story if needed or wanted. Realistic words and thoughts about the animals. Thanks for sharing, and God bless.
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2019
|
Enjoyed this short story about being a lone survivor. Good beginning to a longer story if needed or wanted. Realistic words and thoughts about the animals. Thanks for sharing, and God bless.
Comment Written 13-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2019
-
Thank you so much George for your kind review and thoughts. I appreciate the time you took to read and review. I had a bit of fun with this. I am starting to gravitate to shorter works because of my declining eyesight. I hope you are well and good!
Sally :+)
