Reviews from

St Louis

Viewing comments for Chapter 1 "St. Louis Chapter 1 part 1"
Can McKenzie solve Megan Nelson?s murder?

39 total reviews 
Comment from susand3022
Excellent
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Hi Barbara, I'm enjoying the beginning of your story and getting to know the characters. I did want to mention to you that in this chapter, you have started the last two paragraphs with the same sentence... effectively having the taxt pull up twice. You may want to fix that! :)

 Comment Written 10-Mar-2019


reply by the author on 10-Mar-2019
    I sure will thank you for the catch. I am on it right now.
reply by susand3022 on 10-Mar-2019
    your welcome! :)
Comment from Y. M. Roger
Excellent
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I'm lovin' it and you've definitely got a new reader here, Barbara! ;) ;) Now I can read the one that posted today and 'get it' -- thanx so much! ;) :) Yvette :)

 Comment Written 17-Feb-2019


reply by the author on 17-Feb-2019
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from djsaxon
Excellent
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HI Barbara. Nice write. I love that it is essentially dialogue driven and particularly like the lack of speech tags. I am also a fan of the italic device to indicate thought. I must seek out the prologue and bring myself up to speed. Cheers - DJ

 Comment Written 16-Feb-2019


reply by the author on 17-Feb-2019
    Thank you for dropping by, This novel isn't about the Jewish issue. It was my previous one, but I promise your input is always welcome.
Comment from rtobaygo
Excellent
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Good afternoon, Barbara

Enjoyed the post. Virtual six. I can see the unavoidable confrontation between Mac and and Logan simply because he thinks she's not up to the task. Being a Major, Logan is accustomed to giving orders, not following them. The chauvinistic remark that he could see Mac's father hiring her as a receptionist, but not P.I. speaks volumes on his opinion regarding women as equals. ''Looking forward to how their develops.

Take care and stay safe,

Ray

 Comment Written 16-Feb-2019


reply by the author on 16-Feb-2019
    Thank you for the encouraging review and the virtual six.
Comment from sandragee
Excellent
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When the impatient and condescending Logan Nelson says "I've really made an ass of myself, haven't I?", the cool, calm Mac Morgan doesn't dispute the comment. She tells him that when she has information, she will call his dad. His reply is that he will come by tomorrow to be fill in on the new information she has. This is an interesting start to what is going to be an interesting relationship between these two characters. Nice job.

 Comment Written 13-Feb-2019


reply by the author on 13-Feb-2019
    I am hoping I can pull of the interaction I am hoping for. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Ada Jewell
Excellent
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This was enjoyable. This is an excellent read. Very enjoyable and kept me interested. I like the story and look forward to reading more of your work. Great job on this

 Comment Written 12-Feb-2019


reply by the author on 13-Feb-2019
    Thank you for the kind review.Tha
Comment from kiwijenny
Excellent
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Barbara I wish I had a six . I'm so excited to be part of reviewing something you've written at the beginning...wahoo.im going to go back and read the prologue too. Wahoo. A novel yay..YES....very well penned
God bless

 Comment Written 12-Feb-2019


reply by the author on 13-Feb-2019
    Thank you for the encouragement. I appreciate it.
reply by kiwijenny on 14-Feb-2019
    You are welcome
Comment from TheStoryMan
Excellent
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I think Logan is in for a shock. You don't have to be big and male to investigate crime. I can understand him wanting to solve his sister's murder but it might be better if he lets the professionals handle it. This is going to be interesting.

 Comment Written 12-Feb-2019


reply by the author on 12-Feb-2019
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Miss Sherry
Excellent
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So far, I am hooked. You are a very good writer. Your plot is clear, you opened with a hook and the little dog is a real plus. You have a clean style, not cluttered with messy add-ins or unnecessary conversation. I will look with anxious eyes to the next chapter. Very fine work!

 Comment Written 12-Feb-2019


reply by the author on 12-Feb-2019
    Thank you for the encouragement.
reply by Miss Sherry on 12-Feb-2019
    You are most welcome!!
reply by Miss Sherry on 13-Feb-2019
    You are more than welcome--blessings!
Comment from Gert sherwood
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Hello Barb
I see that you have a new mystery novel to keep us fanstorians intrigued with who murdered Megan Nelson Logan's younger sister. Question I didn't see
The name of Logan's and Megan
dad in your characters list.
Oh, in answer to your questions at the beginning of this chapter, I can not reply to any of your three questions, until I read more about the investigation of Megan's murder.
Gert


 Comment Written 12-Feb-2019


reply by the author on 12-Feb-2019
    When I physically introduce Logan's dad and mom I'll list them. Thank you for the kind review.
reply by Gert sherwood on 12-Feb-2019
    Thank you Barb
    I really like you new novel
    Gert