Endless Part I And II
A poem.30 total reviews
Comment from Joy Graham
Hello ee,
This is a fabulous poem :) I love the shape your words take on the page. Terrific insifghts into a soldier's thoughts while on the battlefield. My dad was a tank mechanic during world war two and I can't imagine what that was like. He survived without a scratch. Absolutely amazing. I enjoyed reading your poem today which brought out many memories and emotions of my dad.
Joy xx
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Hello ee,
This is a fabulous poem :) I love the shape your words take on the page. Terrific insifghts into a soldier's thoughts while on the battlefield. My dad was a tank mechanic during world war two and I can't imagine what that was like. He survived without a scratch. Absolutely amazing. I enjoyed reading your poem today which brought out many memories and emotions of my dad.
Joy xx
Comment Written 10-Jan-2019
Comment from estory
The marching rhythm of the language here combines with the brilliant imagery to create this moving articulation of mental illness, of the fears that haunt us and hold us in their dark grip, keeping us locked in these little dark rooms. It really reminds me of Blake, and his ability to relate these surreal experiences of the spirit. estory
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The marching rhythm of the language here combines with the brilliant imagery to create this moving articulation of mental illness, of the fears that haunt us and hold us in their dark grip, keeping us locked in these little dark rooms. It really reminds me of Blake, and his ability to relate these surreal experiences of the spirit. estory
Comment Written 10-Jan-2019
Comment from Bill Schott
This poem, Endless, Parts I and II, is a work of great design, with alliteration and metaphor throughout. The tone rises and falls, but seems to remain dark. Hard to pin down an exact meaning, but the mood appears to be one of discontent.
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This poem, Endless, Parts I and II, is a work of great design, with alliteration and metaphor throughout. The tone rises and falls, but seems to remain dark. Hard to pin down an exact meaning, but the mood appears to be one of discontent.
Comment Written 10-Jan-2019
Comment from TPAC
Beautiful array of items, dripping delights in well structured line composure, grasping sentiments able to whirl the reader in its pleasing conveyance. All in my opinion of this work.
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Beautiful array of items, dripping delights in well structured line composure, grasping sentiments able to whirl the reader in its pleasing conveyance. All in my opinion of this work.
Comment Written 10-Jan-2019
Comment from Earl Corp
My takeaway from this is it is a warrior battling the demons of PTSD. I picked that up from the references to the muddled mind and worrying about the pit. Your poem rhymed, made sense, and invokes emotions within the writer. Very nice job.
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My takeaway from this is it is a warrior battling the demons of PTSD. I picked that up from the references to the muddled mind and worrying about the pit. Your poem rhymed, made sense, and invokes emotions within the writer. Very nice job.
Comment Written 10-Jan-2019
Comment from AdaJulie
ou are a wonderful writer, im excited to have been able to review you work. Its a intriguing poem that makes me want to read more. Great style, and flow. This truly great writing
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ou are a wonderful writer, im excited to have been able to review you work. Its a intriguing poem that makes me want to read more. Great style, and flow. This truly great writing
Comment Written 10-Jan-2019
Comment from Graybærd
I must say, if I am going to write poetry as good as this, I am going to have to expand my vocabulary. I had to look a few words up. It was worth it though. Correct me please if I am wrong, but I believe this is about someone who must give in to the darkest places of their inner soul to do what must be done.
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I must say, if I am going to write poetry as good as this, I am going to have to expand my vocabulary. I had to look a few words up. It was worth it though. Correct me please if I am wrong, but I believe this is about someone who must give in to the darkest places of their inner soul to do what must be done.
Comment Written 10-Jan-2019
Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear
This speaks the story, as you remember, how being a soldier, you had to kill all those even the friends in the battlefield for the sake of duty and commitment; well said, well done. Write inspire change for 1234 Years--- DR ALCREATOR
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This speaks the story, as you remember, how being a soldier, you had to kill all those even the friends in the battlefield for the sake of duty and commitment; well said, well done. Write inspire change for 1234 Years--- DR ALCREATOR
Comment Written 10-Jan-2019
Comment from Sam Saylor
I feel almost naive whilst reading a text that so clearly touches on a subject matter I hopefully will never experience first hand. At the same time there are some universal feelings that are simultaneously articulated in a complex and simple fashion and it is in this that I find my satisfaction.
A couple of the final lines
I cannot find the strength to seek
The shining sun so bright before
were extremely satisfying for me.
A good work.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
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I feel almost naive whilst reading a text that so clearly touches on a subject matter I hopefully will never experience first hand. At the same time there are some universal feelings that are simultaneously articulated in a complex and simple fashion and it is in this that I find my satisfaction.
A couple of the final lines
I cannot find the strength to seek
The shining sun so bright before
were extremely satisfying for me.
A good work.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 10-Jan-2019
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written poem about fear. We are just human and fear will try to take hold of us from time to time for many reasons, we need to be strong and fight against the emotion of fear until it is gone and we can step into the sunshine again.
Typo
The shinning(shining) sun so bright before,
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
|
A very well-written poem about fear. We are just human and fear will try to take hold of us from time to time for many reasons, we need to be strong and fight against the emotion of fear until it is gone and we can step into the sunshine again.
Typo
The shinning(shining) sun so bright before,
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 10-Jan-2019
