Sins of Chaos
Viewing comments for Chapter 35 "Savage/Part Two"A Novel of the Breedline series
6 total reviews
Comment from apky
Fabulous descriptive passages in the opening paragraphs about Apollyon and his feelings for Yelena, and even more vividly, his four-day-old hunger. Absolutely world-class!
Thanks for another wonderful read, my friend. My suggestions, as usual, are below.
she looked as if she was still in her early twenties(, OR ;) like her age had been frozen in time.
sadistic bonds that kept them prisoner(s OR imprisoned).
reply by the author on 31-Dec-2018
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Fabulous descriptive passages in the opening paragraphs about Apollyon and his feelings for Yelena, and even more vividly, his four-day-old hunger. Absolutely world-class!
Thanks for another wonderful read, my friend. My suggestions, as usual, are below.
she looked as if she was still in her early twenties(, OR ;) like her age had been frozen in time.
sadistic bonds that kept them prisoner(s OR imprisoned).
Comment Written 30-Dec-2018
reply by the author on 31-Dec-2018
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Thank you my dear friend :)
I do love writing the beginning of a romance between Apollyon and Yelena. The old legend of Dracula and his weakness for his beloved gave me the idea for this. I'm a sucker for romance. LOL!
Thank you so much for taking the time to read my chapter and give me your expert tips. Your help is so needed. You are the best!
I hope you and your family enjoys the New Year to come. I'm ready for a fresh start!
Always your fan,
Shana :)
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I think I should start a brand new romance didicated just to you. Sort of give Roman and his Golden a run for their money!
Be blessed with yours for 2019, darling.
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You know I would love that! :)
Comment from ngage
Intriguing chapter, Ms. Shana. I think Yelena is oddly captivated by her captor. I'm wondering where this will lead. Looking forward to finding out.
It seems that your detectives may get some answers from Zeke about the suspects they're after. That leaves me wondering if he is going to tell them about the Breedline. But wouldn't he be breaking their laws?
You always leave me hanging. Lol!
Great chapter my friend!
Nate
reply by the author on 31-Dec-2018
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Intriguing chapter, Ms. Shana. I think Yelena is oddly captivated by her captor. I'm wondering where this will lead. Looking forward to finding out.
It seems that your detectives may get some answers from Zeke about the suspects they're after. That leaves me wondering if he is going to tell them about the Breedline. But wouldn't he be breaking their laws?
You always leave me hanging. Lol!
Great chapter my friend!
Nate
Comment Written 28-Dec-2018
reply by the author on 31-Dec-2018
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Thank you sweet friend :)
So glad you enjoyed another Breedline adventure! Your feedback is always encouraging. Thanks for all your support and kind words.
Big hugs!
Shana :)
Comment from royowen
They say that nothing is more attractive to a woman as when she's loved deeply, which seems to be happening to Yelena, no matter how much she's in love with Zeke, Appollyon will be attractive to Yelena. You've posed a a moral dilemma here dear Shana, great variation on the fear thing. Detective Sanchez who is with Detective Perkins calls Zeke after finding the body of Sylvia, to his surprise he answers and wants to meet. An excellent episode Shana, you've done yourself proud, changing direction in mid stream, well done, blessings, Roy
reply by the author on 31-Dec-2018
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They say that nothing is more attractive to a woman as when she's loved deeply, which seems to be happening to Yelena, no matter how much she's in love with Zeke, Appollyon will be attractive to Yelena. You've posed a a moral dilemma here dear Shana, great variation on the fear thing. Detective Sanchez who is with Detective Perkins calls Zeke after finding the body of Sylvia, to his surprise he answers and wants to meet. An excellent episode Shana, you've done yourself proud, changing direction in mid stream, well done, blessings, Roy
Comment Written 28-Dec-2018
reply by the author on 31-Dec-2018
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Thank you Roy :)
I enjoyed creating the romantic scene between my characters. I am a sucker for a romance story. LOL! Maybe Yelena can tame the beast within Apollyon. They say love conquers all right?
I hope you and your family have a safe and happy New Year. I know I'm ready for the fresh start. Hopefully this one will be better than the last. Wishing you a good one! :)
Always your fan and friend,
Shana :)
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And the same to you and yours Dear Shana, had a wonderful time with family ushering the new year in, fireworks and all!
Comment from AdaJulie
This is so fun to read. Isn't that what it's all about? I know, that is not very technical of me but if it's not fun, well in my mind it's not very good. This my friend is intriguing, curious, suspenseful, engaging and simply fun to read. That makes it the best kind of read. Great job!
reply by the author on 31-Dec-2018
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This is so fun to read. Isn't that what it's all about? I know, that is not very technical of me but if it's not fun, well in my mind it's not very good. This my friend is intriguing, curious, suspenseful, engaging and simply fun to read. That makes it the best kind of read. Great job!
Comment Written 28-Dec-2018
reply by the author on 31-Dec-2018
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Thank you, Ada :)
So glad you enjoyed this chapter. It's a great reward to hear this from my readers. I do love to create new adventures for my Breedline family. I do have fun writing about them.
Thanks again for your awesome feedback! I hope to hear from you again. More adventures to come! :)
Sincerely,
Shana :)
Comment from fm wright
This chapter was truly well written. I really love how you left both stories, that is; Apollyon's and Yelena's, Rizzo's and the detectives with interesting cliffhangers. As always I was really drawn in to the story lines. Wonderful job!
reply by the author on 31-Dec-2018
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This chapter was truly well written. I really love how you left both stories, that is; Apollyon's and Yelena's, Rizzo's and the detectives with interesting cliffhangers. As always I was really drawn in to the story lines. Wonderful job!
Comment Written 27-Dec-2018
reply by the author on 31-Dec-2018
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Thank you so much! :)
Your review is so positive and encouraging for me. I was worried this chapter wouldn't be exciting, but it seems everyone enjoyed it. I definitely have a smile after reading your review. It does make a difference.
Thanks again for your support and I hope you enjoy the New Year coming soon. I'm definitely ready for the fresh start.
Sincerely,
Shana :)
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Happy New Year to you! After reading it, there was no doubt it was a very fine chapter. There shouldn't have been anyone who didn't enjoy it.
Comment from Ricky1024
Sloppy sick funny to see a female author who writes in such dramatic stanzas normally would think of romance novels but I guess that's a thing of the past for the new age at least Margaret Snowdon still writes them does a great job at this was well written and flowed well with no grammar issues the objective object the contents were both excellent exceptional while descriptive measure lined up perfectly good luck with this and your new book and happy holidays dr. Ricky 1024
reply by the author on 31-Dec-2018
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Sloppy sick funny to see a female author who writes in such dramatic stanzas normally would think of romance novels but I guess that's a thing of the past for the new age at least Margaret Snowdon still writes them does a great job at this was well written and flowed well with no grammar issues the objective object the contents were both excellent exceptional while descriptive measure lined up perfectly good luck with this and your new book and happy holidays dr. Ricky 1024
Comment Written 27-Dec-2018
reply by the author on 31-Dec-2018
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Thank you Dr. Ricky :)
I am a sucker for romance. LOL! But I think my type of romance is the Dracula kind. I love how a strong character can have weakness for his beloved. It rings true in real life.
Hope you enjoy the New Year. I know I'm ready for a fresh start. Be happy & safe my friend!
Sincerely,
Shana :)
