A Bigfoot Carol
Christmas with Bigfoot19 total reviews
Comment from Goodadvicechan
This poem has an opening which says: "It's that time of year again. It is too much for me. I am looking forward to spending Christmas by myself."
I expected the author would explain how Bigfoot spent the lonely Christmas. Surprisingly, it turned out, it was not possible for Bigfoot to be left alone.
It was easy to follow what happens. Good job.
reply by the author on 23-Dec-2020
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This poem has an opening which says: "It's that time of year again. It is too much for me. I am looking forward to spending Christmas by myself."
I expected the author would explain how Bigfoot spent the lonely Christmas. Surprisingly, it turned out, it was not possible for Bigfoot to be left alone.
It was easy to follow what happens. Good job.
Comment Written 21-Dec-2020
reply by the author on 23-Dec-2020
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Thanks so much. Elaine
Comment from Ben B.
Sort of reminds me of the abdominal snowman from the Rudolph claymation. Slightly grimm with Tiny Tina's situation but it makes the story more original. Overall I like it.
reply by the author on 23-Dec-2020
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Sort of reminds me of the abdominal snowman from the Rudolph claymation. Slightly grimm with Tiny Tina's situation but it makes the story more original. Overall I like it.
Comment Written 21-Dec-2020
reply by the author on 23-Dec-2020
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Thanks so much. Elaine
Comment from Iza Deleanu
Hm, Mr. Scrunchy Munchy Big Foot, it's visited by the three ghosts of Christmas: " My friend, you are way too self centered. Tonight you will be visited by three ghosts. Listen and pay heed to what they show you".
"Oh great, I can't rest for a change! This is weird. That salmon I just consumed must have had toxic waste in it and I am having hallucinations. Oscar was a big slob that talked to everyone all day long. This can't be real." Thank you for sharing this will be a good story in the Christmas Story.
reply by the author on 23-Dec-2020
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Hm, Mr. Scrunchy Munchy Big Foot, it's visited by the three ghosts of Christmas: " My friend, you are way too self centered. Tonight you will be visited by three ghosts. Listen and pay heed to what they show you".
"Oh great, I can't rest for a change! This is weird. That salmon I just consumed must have had toxic waste in it and I am having hallucinations. Oscar was a big slob that talked to everyone all day long. This can't be real." Thank you for sharing this will be a good story in the Christmas Story.
Comment Written 21-Dec-2020
reply by the author on 23-Dec-2020
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Thanks so much. Elaine
Comment from Luvs2rite4u
Oh, how refreshing is your story? You gave your readers' joy, laughter, and happiness. I saw no errors. Excellent story idea! You have made everyone so happy. This short story could be published. I wish I would've given you so much more you deserve. Luvs.
reply by the author on 23-Dec-2020
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Oh, how refreshing is your story? You gave your readers' joy, laughter, and happiness. I saw no errors. Excellent story idea! You have made everyone so happy. This short story could be published. I wish I would've given you so much more you deserve. Luvs.
Comment Written 21-Dec-2020
reply by the author on 23-Dec-2020
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Thanks again for such a great review and generous amount of stars. Elaine
Comment from Cass Carlton
This is a new slant on the Dickensian classic,and is well written and clever in its composition. There are a couple of lapses where the tense changes from past to present and back again, but an editing would fix that very quickly. My personal preference is to read in the past tense, but the present tense text does lend an immediacy to the story. However having both is confusing, so I suggest you decide which you want and go with it. The changing of the Gender of the third visitor is a very clever devise. Quite a new idea. Well done with this. Some clever utilization of new thinking. cheers Cass
reply by the author on 16-Dec-2018
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This is a new slant on the Dickensian classic,and is well written and clever in its composition. There are a couple of lapses where the tense changes from past to present and back again, but an editing would fix that very quickly. My personal preference is to read in the past tense, but the present tense text does lend an immediacy to the story. However having both is confusing, so I suggest you decide which you want and go with it. The changing of the Gender of the third visitor is a very clever devise. Quite a new idea. Well done with this. Some clever utilization of new thinking. cheers Cass
Comment Written 09-Dec-2018
reply by the author on 16-Dec-2018
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I always have a problem with the tenses and usually have to edit my writing to one or the other. Thanks for taking time to read and review. I greatly appreciate your positive review. Thanks again. Elaine
Comment from melody love
The beginning reminds me a little of the grufflou and maybe a mixture between how the grinch stole Christmas. I only gave a two star because I am sure its a great story however it did not keep my attention long.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 16-Dec-2018
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The beginning reminds me a little of the grufflou and maybe a mixture between how the grinch stole Christmas. I only gave a two star because I am sure its a great story however it did not keep my attention long.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 09-Dec-2018
reply by the author on 16-Dec-2018
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Thanks for taking time to read. Elaine
Comment from Carolyn Reaves
This is a very fun story. I only found a couple fo grammatical errors and a small word left out in one of the lines, but all in all it is a fine writing and it si a very nice holiday story.
reply by the author on 16-Dec-2018
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This is a very fun story. I only found a couple fo grammatical errors and a small word left out in one of the lines, but all in all it is a fine writing and it si a very nice holiday story.
Comment Written 09-Dec-2018
reply by the author on 16-Dec-2018
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I appreciate your taking time to read and review. Thanks for your encouraging words and positive review. Elaine
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You are very welcome.
Comment from giraffmang
Hi there,
This works surprisingly well with the action transposed to the forest and woodland creatures. Nice variations on the theme.
The big ape grunted to himself as he ambles to his cave - mixing your tenses here.
Listen and pay heed to what they show you". punctuation should come inside the dialogue here.
The apparition takes Bigfoot's hand and helps him stand up.
/ Bigfoot shakes his head and manages to stand up.- he was already standing by the second mention of standing here.
He walks onto his cave where - this should either be on to or into here.
He grinning a wide toothless smile. - either he is or grins.
"I see a few rabbits, a racoon, some bluejays... - need closing speech marks here.
and waves good-bye as he disappears - you don't need the hyphen here as it can be a single word.
They land in clearing - in a clearing.
He gives gift of wholeness to the little owl - the gift.
All the best
GMG
reply by the author on 16-Dec-2018
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Hi there,
This works surprisingly well with the action transposed to the forest and woodland creatures. Nice variations on the theme.
The big ape grunted to himself as he ambles to his cave - mixing your tenses here.
Listen and pay heed to what they show you". punctuation should come inside the dialogue here.
The apparition takes Bigfoot's hand and helps him stand up.
/ Bigfoot shakes his head and manages to stand up.- he was already standing by the second mention of standing here.
He walks onto his cave where - this should either be on to or into here.
He grinning a wide toothless smile. - either he is or grins.
"I see a few rabbits, a racoon, some bluejays... - need closing speech marks here.
and waves good-bye as he disappears - you don't need the hyphen here as it can be a single word.
They land in clearing - in a clearing.
He gives gift of wholeness to the little owl - the gift.
All the best
GMG
Comment Written 08-Dec-2018
reply by the author on 16-Dec-2018
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Thanks so much for your editing of this story and it does need some editing. I wrote it very fast. I appreciate your taking time to review and point out the grammar mistakes. Thanks again. Elaine
Comment from kahpot
What a wonderful story and take on this Christmas tale, the that starsts " at the stroke of midnight...." finishes with " He grinning...." maybe He's grinning.... and the one that starts " The Bobcat looks...." His heart feels joy and happiness at he watches" should be, as he watches, I enjoyed this read very much****kahpot
reply by the author on 16-Dec-2018
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What a wonderful story and take on this Christmas tale, the that starsts " at the stroke of midnight...." finishes with " He grinning...." maybe He's grinning.... and the one that starts " The Bobcat looks...." His heart feels joy and happiness at he watches" should be, as he watches, I enjoyed this read very much****kahpot
Comment Written 07-Dec-2018
reply by the author on 16-Dec-2018
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I appreciate your thoughtful comments and taking time to read and review. Elaine
Comment from LynSys
A great parody on an old favorite. The visuals that your story brings forth flow easily with your words. I wonder what they had for dinner ;o))
Good luck in the contest!
reply by the author on 16-Dec-2018
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A great parody on an old favorite. The visuals that your story brings forth flow easily with your words. I wonder what they had for dinner ;o))
Good luck in the contest!
Comment Written 07-Dec-2018
reply by the author on 16-Dec-2018
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Thanks for reading and enjoying. Elaine
