Tanka (My Scented Rose)
Tanka practice17 total reviews
Comment from judiverse
This has a haiku feel to it. There's the seasonal reference, and you focus on nature. But I think there's supposed to be that connection. Excellent alliteration with sweet scent and pink petaled. You do a job with sensory appeal--we have visual with pink petaled and the appeal to sense of smell with sweet scent and perfume, and we feel the warmth of the breeze. Excellent work. judi.
reply by the author on 23-Nov-2018
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This has a haiku feel to it. There's the seasonal reference, and you focus on nature. But I think there's supposed to be that connection. Excellent alliteration with sweet scent and pink petaled. You do a job with sensory appeal--we have visual with pink petaled and the appeal to sense of smell with sweet scent and perfume, and we feel the warmth of the breeze. Excellent work. judi.
Comment Written 23-Nov-2018
reply by the author on 23-Nov-2018
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Thank you so much, Judi.
Melissa
Comment from Joan E.
I could almost smell the "perfume" and enjoyed the vision of the "pink petaled rose". Your use of alliteration throughout this 5-7-5-7-7 tanka added to its intensity. Well done- Joan
reply by the author on 23-Nov-2018
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I could almost smell the "perfume" and enjoyed the vision of the "pink petaled rose". Your use of alliteration throughout this 5-7-5-7-7 tanka added to its intensity. Well done- Joan
Comment Written 23-Nov-2018
reply by the author on 23-Nov-2018
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Thanks so much, Joan. I am glad you like it. All the best!
Melissa
Comment from Pamusart
Hi Melissa. Nothing smells quite as sweet as a rose. Carnations smell nice too. Flower fragrances and colors are one of the greatest free things in the world. Very pretty Tanka. Good pivot line. Thank you for sharing
reply by the author on 23-Nov-2018
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Hi Melissa. Nothing smells quite as sweet as a rose. Carnations smell nice too. Flower fragrances and colors are one of the greatest free things in the world. Very pretty Tanka. Good pivot line. Thank you for sharing
Comment Written 23-Nov-2018
reply by the author on 23-Nov-2018
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Hello, Pam. Thanks so much for your great review. It is a photo and verse about my rose....David Austin ...Heritage... my all-time favorite. I love the smell of roses too.
Have a great day.
Melissa
Comment from June Sargent
If only it were mid summer! It's only 12 degrees here today! I miss my pink roses and their love scent. You've written a lovely Tanka that paints a great image of the warmth of June.
reply by the author on 22-Nov-2018
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If only it were mid summer! It's only 12 degrees here today! I miss my pink roses and their love scent. You've written a lovely Tanka that paints a great image of the warmth of June.
Comment Written 22-Nov-2018
reply by the author on 22-Nov-2018
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Thank you, June. This is a photo of my David Austin rose, ....Heritage..... my all-time favorite! I appreciate your review.
Melissa
Comment from CD Richards
A very lovely tanka. We only have two proper rose bushes, and one is that shade of pink (there are a also couple of climbing roses we are presently encouraging to cover our gazebo). There is nothing like the scent of a fragrant rose bloom. That, and gardenias, are my favourite garden smells, I think. Great job with the evocative description. Cheers, Craig
reply by the author on 22-Nov-2018
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A very lovely tanka. We only have two proper rose bushes, and one is that shade of pink (there are a also couple of climbing roses we are presently encouraging to cover our gazebo). There is nothing like the scent of a fragrant rose bloom. That, and gardenias, are my favourite garden smells, I think. Great job with the evocative description. Cheers, Craig
Comment Written 22-Nov-2018
reply by the author on 22-Nov-2018
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Thank you. I love flowers and look forwards to their blooms each year. Thanks so much, Craig.
Melissa
Comment from BeasPeas
This is indeed a beautiful rose. I could imagine the scent as I have pink roses in my garden, too. Nicely constructed tanka. Third line (pivot) unites the first 2 and second 2 lines. Marilyn
reply by the author on 21-Nov-2018
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This is indeed a beautiful rose. I could imagine the scent as I have pink roses in my garden, too. Nicely constructed tanka. Third line (pivot) unites the first 2 and second 2 lines. Marilyn
Comment Written 21-Nov-2018
reply by the author on 21-Nov-2018
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Hello, Marilyn. I love roses too. This photo is of my David Austin... Heritage. My all-time favorite! Thanks for the review.
Melissa
Comment from poetwatch
I love roses and l always inhale their sweet perfume, delicate and beautiful and pink, my favorite color. This is a good 5-7-5-7-7 Tanka you should make a contest in this format so that other FanStorians can have a go of something different instead of the 5-7-5
reply by the author on 21-Nov-2018
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I love roses and l always inhale their sweet perfume, delicate and beautiful and pink, my favorite color. This is a good 5-7-5-7-7 Tanka you should make a contest in this format so that other FanStorians can have a go of something different instead of the 5-7-5
Comment Written 21-Nov-2018
reply by the author on 21-Nov-2018
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Thanks so much, I may do it!! I like a little variety in our FS community. Do you?
All the best,
Melissa
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written Tanka. A beutiful rose are even better when it has a breathtaking fragrance that we can smell from a distance in the light breeze on a warm day.
reply by the author on 21-Nov-2018
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A very well-written Tanka. A beutiful rose are even better when it has a breathtaking fragrance that we can smell from a distance in the light breeze on a warm day.
Comment Written 21-Nov-2018
reply by the author on 21-Nov-2018
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Hi, Sandra. That happens to be my photo... it is my David Austin....Heritage... my all- time fave! Thank you for a lovely review.
Melissa
Comment from Dorothy Farrell
Hi Melissa, Five beautifully penned lines and the rose is gorgeous - just to look at the picture you can tell it will be of the perfumed kind. Perfect tanka in good 5/7/5/7/7 - the traditional format. Well done - regards Dorothy x
reply by the author on 21-Nov-2018
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Hi Melissa, Five beautifully penned lines and the rose is gorgeous - just to look at the picture you can tell it will be of the perfumed kind. Perfect tanka in good 5/7/5/7/7 - the traditional format. Well done - regards Dorothy x
Comment Written 21-Nov-2018
reply by the author on 21-Nov-2018
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Hi, Dorothy. That happens to be my photo... it is my David Austin....Heritage... my all- time fave! Thank you for a lovely review.
Melissa
Comment from lyenochka
Beautiful English rose! Iike the"wafting" and "breeze" used to show the movement of the perfume of the rose. And they are more aromatic on a warm summer evening. I'm not a tanka expert but those who are seem to change the theme after the third line.
reply by the author on 21-Nov-2018
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Beautiful English rose! Iike the"wafting" and "breeze" used to show the movement of the perfume of the rose. And they are more aromatic on a warm summer evening. I'm not a tanka expert but those who are seem to change the theme after the third line.
Comment Written 21-Nov-2018
reply by the author on 21-Nov-2018
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Thank you, Helen. that is a photograph of my David Austin ...Heritage... my all time favorite! I appreciate your review.
Melissa
