The Life of a . . .
A Quatern for Potlatch21 total reviews
Comment from Pearl Edwards
Cleverly done Yvonne, it brought me an early Sunday morning smile, just as the birds started chirping outside. Love this Quatern, I of course was thinking of us oldies, but the shoelace, that was perfect.
Enjoyed,
cheers,
valda
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2018
Cleverly done Yvonne, it brought me an early Sunday morning smile, just as the birds started chirping outside. Love this Quatern, I of course was thinking of us oldies, but the shoelace, that was perfect.
Enjoyed,
cheers,
valda
Comment Written 17-Nov-2018
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2018
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I'm glad you enjoyed it. Thanks for reviewing.
Comment from Dawn Munro
Ya got me! I guess that to show how old I'M feelin', huh? (LOL) What an adorable poem. Here I was, about to be all maudlin and depressed (lol), and it's nothing but an old shoelace. HAHAHAHAHA! Pray tell, how did G-man inspire it? :))
reply by the author on 16-Nov-2018
Ya got me! I guess that to show how old I'M feelin', huh? (LOL) What an adorable poem. Here I was, about to be all maudlin and depressed (lol), and it's nothing but an old shoelace. HAHAHAHAHA! Pray tell, how did G-man inspire it? :))
Comment Written 16-Nov-2018
reply by the author on 16-Nov-2018
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When he gave that contest of new writing prompts, he mentioned someone would write about the life of a shoelace. So I did. lol. I'm so glad you enjoyed it and it gave you a laugh. Thank you, Dawn.
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Hahahaha. You minx.
Comment from krys123
Cheers, Damommy;
>How fun, I mean I had a lot of fun enjoy reading this and trying to determine what it was you were describing. And for the life of me I could not guess. Chuckle!
> So true, the shoelace is the inevitable to having wear and do become obsolete when they specially break when you need them the most.
> Excellent rhyming with all the rhyming words work together to form an enchantment that flowed smoothly because of the rhyming and the coordinated rhythmic meter that health flow things along.
> Thanks for sharing this, Damommy, and take care and have a good one.
Alex
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2018
Cheers, Damommy;
>How fun, I mean I had a lot of fun enjoy reading this and trying to determine what it was you were describing. And for the life of me I could not guess. Chuckle!
> So true, the shoelace is the inevitable to having wear and do become obsolete when they specially break when you need them the most.
> Excellent rhyming with all the rhyming words work together to form an enchantment that flowed smoothly because of the rhyming and the coordinated rhythmic meter that health flow things along.
> Thanks for sharing this, Damommy, and take care and have a good one.
Alex
Comment Written 13-Nov-2018
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2018
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Thank you, Alex, for such a wonderful review. I'm glad it gave you a chuckle.
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You're very welcome, Damommy.
Alx
Comment from Ulla
Awe,Yvonne, surely you can't be talking about yourself or a beloved pet for that matter. Well, I certainly don't hope so. That would be far too upsetting. I loved the poem. So well written. Kind regards. Ulla:)))
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2018
Awe,Yvonne, surely you can't be talking about yourself or a beloved pet for that matter. Well, I certainly don't hope so. That would be far too upsetting. I loved the poem. So well written. Kind regards. Ulla:)))
Comment Written 13-Nov-2018
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2018
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Thank you. I was talking about a shoelace.
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written Quatern about things we cannot do without, but there comes a time that it starts to get too old to do a proper job any longer and must be replaced by a newer version.
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2018
A very well-written Quatern about things we cannot do without, but there comes a time that it starts to get too old to do a proper job any longer and must be replaced by a newer version.
Comment Written 13-Nov-2018
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2018
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Thank you for reviewing, Sandra.
Comment from nancy_e_davis
This is really a fun poem Yvonne. I enjoyed it, but I have a suggestion. The line "No other one could do my task."
might fit in better with "Another one will do my task."
I think joined in the next verse should be join. Just suggestions. Love the poem. The surprise subject was a hoot and surprised me! Well done. Nancy:)
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2018
This is really a fun poem Yvonne. I enjoyed it, but I have a suggestion. The line "No other one could do my task."
might fit in better with "Another one will do my task."
I think joined in the next verse should be join. Just suggestions. Love the poem. The surprise subject was a hoot and surprised me! Well done. Nancy:)
Comment Written 13-Nov-2018
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2018
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good suggestion, but I think it's speaking of itself at the moment. lol. Thanks for reviewing.
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I changed it. Thanks for the suggestion.
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(((SMILES)))
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
I enjoyed your potlatch challenge poem, Yvonne. Good job on the smooth flow of words/lines. The rhymes are an added bonus. I like the color scheme and the picture is perfect. I like that you did not 'give away' what your object was--you kept us reading until the end. You are right about shoelaces. What does one do with old ones? Good job and thanks for sharing. Jan
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2018
I enjoyed your potlatch challenge poem, Yvonne. Good job on the smooth flow of words/lines. The rhymes are an added bonus. I like the color scheme and the picture is perfect. I like that you did not 'give away' what your object was--you kept us reading until the end. You are right about shoelaces. What does one do with old ones? Good job and thanks for sharing. Jan
Comment Written 13-Nov-2018
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2018
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Thank you so much, Jan. I appreciate this wonderful review.
Comment from Y. M. Roger
What a wonderful write this is, ma'am!! :) ;) I kept thinking it was going to be ribbon or bow or something, but how great that it is a shoestring!!! :) ;) This is a really fun write, Yvonne - certainly puts a smile on the reader's face with the 'reveal' at the end! :) ;) Thanx for sharing! :)
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2018
What a wonderful write this is, ma'am!! :) ;) I kept thinking it was going to be ribbon or bow or something, but how great that it is a shoestring!!! :) ;) This is a really fun write, Yvonne - certainly puts a smile on the reader's face with the 'reveal' at the end! :) ;) Thanx for sharing! :)
Comment Written 13-Nov-2018
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2018
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I'm glad if I made you smile. Thank you so much.
Comment from Pantygynt
You are right there. There is nothing more redundant than an old shoelace absolutely useless. However I doubt if the comparison in your case is truly valid. The refrain line seems perfectly appropriate as it tuymbles through the poem, except in the third stanza. If no one else can do your work how the devil is he going to keep his shoes on?
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2018
You are right there. There is nothing more redundant than an old shoelace absolutely useless. However I doubt if the comparison in your case is truly valid. The refrain line seems perfectly appropriate as it tuymbles through the poem, except in the third stanza. If no one else can do your work how the devil is he going to keep his shoes on?
Comment Written 13-Nov-2018
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2018
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Lol. You're right. Maybe I should change that. It has been suggested before. Thank you.
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Ah I am not alone then.
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No, you weren't. I changed it.
Comment from LIJ Red
The last shoelace I saw was on the steel-toed electricity-proof shoes my employer bought for me. The last shoes in my life that actually fit.(10EEEE) Yay Velcro...
I think I'll try a quatern...you did good with this 'un.
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2018
The last shoelace I saw was on the steel-toed electricity-proof shoes my employer bought for me. The last shoes in my life that actually fit.(10EEEE) Yay Velcro...
I think I'll try a quatern...you did good with this 'un.
Comment Written 13-Nov-2018
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2018
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Thank you. Yes, you should try one.