Carolyn
Her passing took not long32 total reviews
Comment from harmony13
Excellent Poem! The author's words are heart felt, sad and thought
provoking. The reader pondered on the theme of this poem. The
artwork is interesting and also had the reader ponder on the meaning.
Thank you for the author's notes. This poem is well written.
  |
Excellent Poem! The author's words are heart felt, sad and thought
provoking. The reader pondered on the theme of this poem. The
artwork is interesting and also had the reader ponder on the meaning.
Thank you for the author's notes. This poem is well written.
Comment Written 06-Oct-2018
Comment from Ogden
This well-written poetry is a touching tribute to your lost friend, LoannaLois.
I know it's especially painful when the end comes unexpectedly, and suddenly.
My condolences,
Don
|
This well-written poetry is a touching tribute to your lost friend, LoannaLois.
I know it's especially painful when the end comes unexpectedly, and suddenly.
My condolences,
Don
Comment Written 06-Oct-2018
Comment from Hayley Zemontas
Wow such a stunning tribute to someone who clearly meant the world to you- a dear friend who you will miss terribly. I hope writing this gave you a tiny bit of comfort. I always find writing such a helpful way of expressing difficult emotions. I'm sure this was especially difficult because it took you by surprise. It's such a shame that she felt she had to end her life, but sadly this was her choice to make and she obviously chose to spare you from knowing her decision. I love the closing line because I think this really sums up how much she meant to you and also this is something we can all relate to because when we lose someone, we then realise we can never get that person back and no photograph or amount of memories seem enough. I'm so sorry for your loss, thanks for sharing this lovely poem x
 |
Wow such a stunning tribute to someone who clearly meant the world to you- a dear friend who you will miss terribly. I hope writing this gave you a tiny bit of comfort. I always find writing such a helpful way of expressing difficult emotions. I'm sure this was especially difficult because it took you by surprise. It's such a shame that she felt she had to end her life, but sadly this was her choice to make and she obviously chose to spare you from knowing her decision. I love the closing line because I think this really sums up how much she meant to you and also this is something we can all relate to because when we lose someone, we then realise we can never get that person back and no photograph or amount of memories seem enough. I'm so sorry for your loss, thanks for sharing this lovely poem x
Comment Written 06-Oct-2018
Comment from Dorothy Farrell
Hello Loanna, a well written poem dedicated to your friend Carolyn, now deceased. I like the way you stress she went suddenly, no announcement - no sign of pain. A good way to go, but not too soon I would say. I like the description of her room and your final words 'The last visions of her never enough To fill A friendship's Memory.'
Well done Loanna - warm regards Dorothy x
|
Hello Loanna, a well written poem dedicated to your friend Carolyn, now deceased. I like the way you stress she went suddenly, no announcement - no sign of pain. A good way to go, but not too soon I would say. I like the description of her room and your final words 'The last visions of her never enough To fill A friendship's Memory.'
Well done Loanna - warm regards Dorothy x
Comment Written 06-Oct-2018
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written poem about a good friend that leaves us behind here on earth behind while passing on not part of this world anymore. The only things we have left is our memories.
|
A very well-written poem about a good friend that leaves us behind here on earth behind while passing on not part of this world anymore. The only things we have left is our memories.
Comment Written 06-Oct-2018
Comment from jenintorre
I really enjoyed reading this poem but it made me very sad as I have lost my best friend also and can't really come to terms with it as it was so unexpected. A very well written free verse poem. I wish you lots of luck in the competition. Best wishes. Jen.
|
I really enjoyed reading this poem but it made me very sad as I have lost my best friend also and can't really come to terms with it as it was so unexpected. A very well written free verse poem. I wish you lots of luck in the competition. Best wishes. Jen.
Comment Written 06-Oct-2018
Comment from DonandVicki
The image that you used to enhance your poem is well chosen and helps to bring out strong feelings of loss, your loss... Well composed. Your work moved me. Don
|
The image that you used to enhance your poem is well chosen and helps to bring out strong feelings of loss, your loss... Well composed. Your work moved me. Don
Comment Written 06-Oct-2018
Comment from Anntonette
I am so sorry for your loss. Keep on writing, keep on fighting. I wish you best of luck in the Free Verse contest. Just remember you aren't alone in this, your friends and family including readers are there for you!
|
I am so sorry for your loss. Keep on writing, keep on fighting. I wish you best of luck in the Free Verse contest. Just remember you aren't alone in this, your friends and family including readers are there for you!
Comment Written 06-Oct-2018
Comment from poesyapprentice
A sad piece that flowed well with good imagery, although I couldn't quite wrap my head around
Sheer white curtains swirl now-
No longer a fact; denied.
And I'm curious as to the reason the last phrase was divided differently than the previous ones. It does slow down the speed and add emphasis but it was a bit halting for me.
The phrases which end in "and" and "or" leave the emphasis on those less important words since they are left hanging out there so I would suggest changing the line breaks and moving those two words on around to the next lines.
Hope something in my review has been helpful to you on your continued writing journey. Thank you for sharing it with me. I'm sorry for your lose.
|
A sad piece that flowed well with good imagery, although I couldn't quite wrap my head around
Sheer white curtains swirl now-
No longer a fact; denied.
And I'm curious as to the reason the last phrase was divided differently than the previous ones. It does slow down the speed and add emphasis but it was a bit halting for me.
The phrases which end in "and" and "or" leave the emphasis on those less important words since they are left hanging out there so I would suggest changing the line breaks and moving those two words on around to the next lines.
Hope something in my review has been helpful to you on your continued writing journey. Thank you for sharing it with me. I'm sorry for your lose.
Comment Written 06-Oct-2018
Comment from Lady Jane
I read this three times. What a heart wrenching piece. I am sorry for your loss. However, this pays an honest homage to the dear, sweet friend you call Carolyn. Clean writing with raw emotion and dedication. Never give up on spreading your words...you have a gift. Natural, raw talent...have fun with the writing, find time to heal and grieve, then write your little heart out. I assume the image is from the funeral, Loanna Lois? Blessings to you. I find the whole of this cleanly constructed and presented with good, strong verbiage and pov.
Janelle
|
I read this three times. What a heart wrenching piece. I am sorry for your loss. However, this pays an honest homage to the dear, sweet friend you call Carolyn. Clean writing with raw emotion and dedication. Never give up on spreading your words...you have a gift. Natural, raw talent...have fun with the writing, find time to heal and grieve, then write your little heart out. I assume the image is from the funeral, Loanna Lois? Blessings to you. I find the whole of this cleanly constructed and presented with good, strong verbiage and pov.
Janelle
Comment Written 06-Oct-2018
