Sins of Chaos
Viewing comments for Chapter 20 "Broken Dreams"A Novel of the Breedline series
6 total reviews
Comment from apky
Oh, no. Poor Sebastian.
This was another of your incredible chapters full of action and emotional as well as physical pain. You make the reader feel with the children and hate Montgomery, Sybil and the guards.
Now the reader is left wondering what else Lucifer will come up with for Sebastian. The obvious is, it can only be even more horrible.
Brilliant write, darling. You've got this one!
reply by the author on 17-Sep-2018
  |
Oh, no. Poor Sebastian.
This was another of your incredible chapters full of action and emotional as well as physical pain. You make the reader feel with the children and hate Montgomery, Sybil and the guards.
Now the reader is left wondering what else Lucifer will come up with for Sebastian. The obvious is, it can only be even more horrible.
Brilliant write, darling. You've got this one!
Comment Written 14-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 17-Sep-2018
-
Thank you!!! :)
You're are awesome for taking time to read and review my chapter, girl! So glad you enjoyed. And yes, I feel sorry for Sebastian. It pained me to write about his childhood past, but wanted to tell his story. I think everyone will enjoy the light at the end of the tunnel.
You are appreciated! I've been bragging about your new book. And my name is in your acknowledgements!!! Wow ... what an honor! Thank you!
Always your fan,
Shana :)
Comment from ngage
Ms. Shana, you've managed to draw me into your story once again and leave me feeling sorry for your characters. I've become invested in your characters and find this chapter a tear jerker. You are skilled with the talent of hooking your readers and leaving them excited for more. Congratulations my dear, you have me hooked to the series. Looking forward to more!
Nate
reply by the author on 13-Sep-2018
 |
Ms. Shana, you've managed to draw me into your story once again and leave me feeling sorry for your characters. I've become invested in your characters and find this chapter a tear jerker. You are skilled with the talent of hooking your readers and leaving them excited for more. Congratulations my dear, you have me hooked to the series. Looking forward to more!
Nate
Comment Written 13-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 13-Sep-2018
-
Awww... thank you Nate :)
I'm truly blessed to have your support! Glad my story excites you and has you addicted. :)
Hugs,
Shana :)
Comment from Ulla
Hi There, I got curious and wanted to see for myself. I've heard about how well you write from a friend who hasn't been on the site for quite a while. And indeed you do write extremely well. I'm glad I read this chapter. To be honest with you, fantasy is not my cup of tea, but that has nothing to do with your quality of writing. As I said it's excellent, and you certainly have a story going. Best regards. Ulla:)))
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2018
|
Hi There, I got curious and wanted to see for myself. I've heard about how well you write from a friend who hasn't been on the site for quite a while. And indeed you do write extremely well. I'm glad I read this chapter. To be honest with you, fantasy is not my cup of tea, but that has nothing to do with your quality of writing. As I said it's excellent, and you certainly have a story going. Best regards. Ulla:)))
Comment Written 11-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2018
-
Thank you, Ulla :)
Please tell your friend thank you for recommending my story. This is definitely the highlight of my day. I enjoy creating adventures for my Breedline characters and love to share with others. Thank you so much for the awesome rating and your kind words of encouragement. Hope to hear from you again.
Sincerely,
Shana :)
Comment from rwilliam
OH MY WORD is what went through my mind when I read the title of your chapter and then saw the photo. They go hand in hand. PERFECT!!
Wow, that was a heavy chapter and earned the title of 'broken'. Good job. It's hard to write that kind of stuff. It's hard to read. That makes for great writing. I'm impressed.
Bravo, my friend.
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2018
|
OH MY WORD is what went through my mind when I read the title of your chapter and then saw the photo. They go hand in hand. PERFECT!!
Wow, that was a heavy chapter and earned the title of 'broken'. Good job. It's hard to write that kind of stuff. It's hard to read. That makes for great writing. I'm impressed.
Bravo, my friend.
Comment Written 10-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2018
-
Thank you, girl :)
I loved the photo when I found it on facebook. It just caught my eye and tugged at my heart. I created this chapter because I wanted readers to see the back story of Sebastian's life. He's broken, but you will see a shining light at the end. I believe all people deserve a second chance.
Thanks for all your support! I feel blessed.
Hugs,
Shana :)
-
I really like where you are going with it. That was smart. You go from hating to him to caring about him and pulling for him, but then feel like should you? Excellent writing!!
Comment from fm wright
Another truly captivating chapter. I truly like how you chose to end this particular chapter. I did not see any flaws such as typing errors, tense, continuation of thought or anything else. Well written.
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2018
|
Another truly captivating chapter. I truly like how you chose to end this particular chapter. I did not see any flaws such as typing errors, tense, continuation of thought or anything else. Well written.
Comment Written 10-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2018
-
Thank you my friend :)
So glad to hear you enjoyed another chapter. This one tugged at my heart as I created it. My character Sebastian has done a lot of bad things in his life, but hopefully readers will understand his back story to know why his heart darkened through the years. He is my alter ego. Just like Sebastian, all people deserve a second chance. Stay tuned, I promise there is a light at the end of the story.
Sincerely,
Shana :)
-
Don't worry Shana I'm staying tuned. You are most assuredly welcome.
Comment from royowen
I think you've brilliantly cornered the market on the depravity of Satan's malevolence Shana, we even know he an unleash even worse than this, with the sheer cruelty of the holocaust, the killing fields of Cambodia, and
who knows what extremities he would go to. I think you've captured the essence of the evil that can be done. But now you've given Sebastion a new lease, and reveal that there is hope for all who turn away from the horror that they themselves unleashed, and there is always hope and a way back, nobody is completely lost, although some...? Well done, extra good episode, well done, blessings, Roy
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2018
|
I think you've brilliantly cornered the market on the depravity of Satan's malevolence Shana, we even know he an unleash even worse than this, with the sheer cruelty of the holocaust, the killing fields of Cambodia, and
who knows what extremities he would go to. I think you've captured the essence of the evil that can be done. But now you've given Sebastion a new lease, and reveal that there is hope for all who turn away from the horror that they themselves unleashed, and there is always hope and a way back, nobody is completely lost, although some...? Well done, extra good episode, well done, blessings, Roy
Comment Written 10-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2018
-
Thank you dear friend :)
Yes, I agree. Most all people can change their dark heart. God gives us the tools, we just have to use them. The dark side will always whisper evil thoughts in our ears, but we have the chose to ignore them. Stay tuned, the story has light at the end. I know you will enjoy it.
Thank you for your inspiring words and dedicated support. YOU make a difference.
Always your fan,
Shana :)
-
Well done dear girl
