Chicago Tonight
100-word crime story10 total reviews
Comment from Cindy McIntyre
Hmmm...I like the little twist at the end, which is great for a good mystery and crime story. Not easy to do in 100 words, but you pulled it off. Great entry for the contest. I wish you lots of luck. Stay away from any lady in a green dress, too! :)
reply by the author on 28-Aug-2018
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Hmmm...I like the little twist at the end, which is great for a good mystery and crime story. Not easy to do in 100 words, but you pulled it off. Great entry for the contest. I wish you lots of luck. Stay away from any lady in a green dress, too! :)
Comment Written 28-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 28-Aug-2018
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Hi Cindy. I am delighted you enjoyed my crime shortie. I did have luck in the contest, finishing second. Rod
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OH, wow. CONGRATS. :) I'm sorry I missed out on that vote. :( Since school has started (summer's over), I have been limited in my time to spend on FS, and it saddens me.
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
You did a good job with your 100 word flash story, Rod. Your lines flowed smoothly. The picture is supportive. I like the dialogue. I did not see this ending, but it makes perfect sense. Best wishes. Jan.
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2018
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You did a good job with your 100 word flash story, Rod. Your lines flowed smoothly. The picture is supportive. I like the dialogue. I did not see this ending, but it makes perfect sense. Best wishes. Jan.
Comment Written 27-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2018
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I am delighted you enjoyed my crime shortie, Jan, and that the ending caught you by surprise. Rod
Comment from phill doran
Hello Anon
Very good. A tight script and a good 'snap' ending - which I did not anticipate. Clear and crisp writing.
In passing, my MS Word makes this 104 words? I might be wrong (or, should I say, Bill Gates may be wrong)
I wish you well in the contest.
cheers
phill
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2018
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Hello Anon
Very good. A tight script and a good 'snap' ending - which I did not anticipate. Clear and crisp writing.
In passing, my MS Word makes this 104 words? I might be wrong (or, should I say, Bill Gates may be wrong)
I wish you well in the contest.
cheers
phill
Comment Written 27-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2018
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Thank you so much, phill, for your comments on my short crime story. As I said in my notes, I used Apple Pages as my word counter. I would use MS Word if I had it. Rod
Comment from Twinsissy
WOW!!
powerful - you set the scene quickly and effectively, and described the story well. Your efficiency of words was able to convey a lot, but at the same time, I came to the end of the piece and said - "so what happened next" which is what an effective piece of prose is meant to evoke.
Great job.
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2018
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WOW!!
powerful - you set the scene quickly and effectively, and described the story well. Your efficiency of words was able to convey a lot, but at the same time, I came to the end of the piece and said - "so what happened next" which is what an effective piece of prose is meant to evoke.
Great job.
Comment Written 26-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2018
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I am thrilled you found "Chicago Tonight" to be a "WOW!" story. I truly appreciate your great praise and those six bright stars. Rod
Comment from Bill Schott
This one-hundred-word story, Chicago Tonight, falls within the limited format and finds that sometimes stalkers can get lead poisoning.
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2018
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This one-hundred-word story, Chicago Tonight, falls within the limited format and finds that sometimes stalkers can get lead poisoning.
Comment Written 26-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2018
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Many thanks for sharing my short crime story, Bill.
Comment from giraffmang
Hi there,
I checked the word count manually and using MS word and make it only 98. Some word counters count the ellipsis (. . .) as separate words which throw the count off).
The story itself is a good one.
All the best
GMG
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2018
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Hi there,
I checked the word count manually and using MS word and make it only 98. Some word counters count the ellipsis (. . .) as separate words which throw the count off).
The story itself is a good one.
All the best
GMG
Comment Written 26-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2018
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If I had MS Word, I would use it, but my Apple computer came with Pages. Its counter said 100, and I did not feel compelled to count manually. Glad you liked the story itself.
Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear
This speaks the shooting scene at Chicago tonight, she was interrogated as a witness to the murder and the murderer was her ex-husband who is to stalk her again tonight now she has the gun; well said, well done. Keep Writing -- DR ALCREATOR
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2018
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This speaks the shooting scene at Chicago tonight, she was interrogated as a witness to the murder and the murderer was her ex-husband who is to stalk her again tonight now she has the gun; well said, well done. Keep Writing -- DR ALCREATOR
Comment Written 25-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2018
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Thank you for sharing my very short crime story.
Comment from Kerry Foley Robinson
Oh.... Now that's really quite the crime story. Great ending! "You want this?" lol a gun in her purse. Fabulous little piece of flash fiction. Good luck! ~Kerry
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2018
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Oh.... Now that's really quite the crime story. Great ending! "You want this?" lol a gun in her purse. Fabulous little piece of flash fiction. Good luck! ~Kerry
Comment Written 25-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2018
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I am delighted you enjoyed my short crime story, Kerry. Many thanks for your kind praise.
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Very welcome.
Comment from Miranda Langston
huh... this is an interesting take on a homicide story. i can't say i blame the woman, though. i'd probably shoot my ex husband, too. very nice tale :)
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2018
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huh... this is an interesting take on a homicide story. i can't say i blame the woman, though. i'd probably shoot my ex husband, too. very nice tale :)
Comment Written 25-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2018
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Thank you, Miranda, for sharing my short crime story and your kind praise.
Comment from heart of Lou
Great story written in just 100 words. Can't say I blame her for shooting him. It might have been a case of self-defence, or 'it's either me or you'. Funny how she handed the cop the murder weapon.
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2018
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Great story written in just 100 words. Can't say I blame her for shooting him. It might have been a case of self-defence, or 'it's either me or you'. Funny how she handed the cop the murder weapon.
Comment Written 25-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2018
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It will be interesting to see if she goes to trial. Many thanks for sharing my short crime story and your kind praise.
