Granny's Revenge
Viewing comments for Chapter 19 "Facing Their Dilemma"Losing everything Granny is out for revenge.
7 total reviews
Comment from giraffmang
The girls just can't get a break at the moment. It appears only a matter of time...
lodges in the second thug's skin. - change in font size here.
You probably think I'm a big baby, blubbering the way I did." - need opening speech marks here.
Losing his grip, the assailant slides down the mountainside / She sees a man lying awkwardly on the edge of the cliff. She then notices tire tracks across his back. - these descriptions don't fully add up. of he slid down the mountain side, he wouldn't be on the edge of a cliff to get run over.
"How's it going Sergeant," he asks as he continues towards their station. - possibly a question mark here.
"It turns out you were right all along?" The captain grins - this felt more of a statement than a question.
"I hope she gives you hell too, Jerry?" - do you need the question mark here.
"I'm an angel, sir"- need punctuation before the closing speech marks here.
"I thought I saw a cop. - need closing speech marks here.
Granny quickly scans the area, hoping to find a place to turn off. She quickly - maybe find an alternative for one of the usages of quickly here.
All the best
G
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2018
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The girls just can't get a break at the moment. It appears only a matter of time...
lodges in the second thug's skin. - change in font size here.
You probably think I'm a big baby, blubbering the way I did." - need opening speech marks here.
Losing his grip, the assailant slides down the mountainside / She sees a man lying awkwardly on the edge of the cliff. She then notices tire tracks across his back. - these descriptions don't fully add up. of he slid down the mountain side, he wouldn't be on the edge of a cliff to get run over.
"How's it going Sergeant," he asks as he continues towards their station. - possibly a question mark here.
"It turns out you were right all along?" The captain grins - this felt more of a statement than a question.
"I hope she gives you hell too, Jerry?" - do you need the question mark here.
"I'm an angel, sir"- need punctuation before the closing speech marks here.
"I thought I saw a cop. - need closing speech marks here.
Granny quickly scans the area, hoping to find a place to turn off. She quickly - maybe find an alternative for one of the usages of quickly here.
All the best
G
Comment Written 20-Jul-2018
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2018
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Thank you so much for your always fair, helpful review. It does seem like they run from one bad situation to another. The question is how much more can they run?
Thank you again for all your help and support it's always greatly appreciated, take care.
Comment from Roxanna Andrews
Oh dear, is this the end for Granny? They should not have taken one of those fancy cars with computers. Now they are in big trouble. Fun read, looking forward to the outcome. Rox
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2018
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Oh dear, is this the end for Granny? They should not have taken one of those fancy cars with computers. Now they are in big trouble. Fun read, looking forward to the outcome. Rox
Comment Written 19-Jul-2018
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2018
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Thank you for such a great review. Trading their car for one that was reported stolen wasn't a great idea. They are running for a second vehicle, hopefully, they make it.
Thank you again for your wonderful review and all your support it means a lot to me, take care.
Comment from Miranda Langston
I really like the start you have going here. this is quite a fast paced novel it seems like and the subject is very interesting... a killer grandma :D i look forward to reading the next chapter
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2018
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I really like the start you have going here. this is quite a fast paced novel it seems like and the subject is very interesting... a killer grandma :D i look forward to reading the next chapter
Comment Written 19-Jul-2018
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2018
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Thank you so much for such a wonderful review and your encouraging words. Reviews like yours make it all worthwhile. I'm afraid you're coming in right at the end of Granny's story. The rest of the story is in my portfolio if you'd like to read it from the beginning.
Thank you again for your fantastic review, I really appreciate it, take care.
Comment from Gert sherwood
Hello Mistydawn
I say you certanley know how to kept the excitement going in your story about these two
elderly clever gals, always getting away with murder Jackie and Granny better have a better plan or are they going to get caught?
Gert
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2018
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Hello Mistydawn
I say you certanley know how to kept the excitement going in your story about these two
elderly clever gals, always getting away with murder Jackie and Granny better have a better plan or are they going to get caught?
Gert
Comment Written 19-Jul-2018
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2018
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Thank you for your great review. Don't worry these two aren't quite finished yet. Although their outrunning the law has to supersede their mission, at least for the time being, lol.
Thank you again for all your support your friendship it means the world to me, take care.
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You are welcome Misty
Gert
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
Grrr... Just as they're getting away you send the cops. How could you? I trusted you!
Well, it's not over till it's over, so I'm still going to hope for the best!
How many guys did Granny kill? Have you counted. It's more than four now, right?
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2018
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Grrr... Just as they're getting away you send the cops. How could you? I trusted you!
Well, it's not over till it's over, so I'm still going to hope for the best!
How many guys did Granny kill? Have you counted. It's more than four now, right?
Comment Written 19-Jul-2018
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2018
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Thank you for your great review I figured I was going to get a tongue lashing from you for this, lol. You're right it's not over until it's over and as it stands they have two choices wild horses or the truck.
How many have they killed? At least thirty between the alley, bar and the individual killings. That's not including what Granny did before she met Jackie.
Thank you for your kind review and all your support, take care.
I was watching TV last night and the show had a little side story. A couple once in love was separated only to find each other again years later. Finding out he was dying, being recently widowed she didn't want to go through that again, she left. In the end, fate brought them back together. I thought if someone were to change a few details to avoid plagiarism fluff it a bit that'd make a great love story. Something I know you do well.
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That story sounds too sad for me. I could never write a story where a loved one died. I could never even write a story where a dog died!
Comment from royowen
How interesting, shutting down a car remotely, how can this be? Lthough there are marvellous applications in technology, such as driverless cars, almost sentiment cars. Two smart cookies in granny and Jackie, but it the net is closing in, plus it's now apparent that Matilda is innocent, well done, blessings, Roy
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2018
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How interesting, shutting down a car remotely, how can this be? Lthough there are marvellous applications in technology, such as driverless cars, almost sentiment cars. Two smart cookies in granny and Jackie, but it the net is closing in, plus it's now apparent that Matilda is innocent, well done, blessings, Roy
Comment Written 19-Jul-2018
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2018
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Thank you for such a kind review. If the car has Onstar or another car security company they can shut it down remotely if it's reported stolen. Car lenders can make it so the car won't start if you get behind on payments. Isn't technology great?
Thank you again for all your support, your encouragement and friendship it means a lot to me.
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Well done, good writing
Comment from Ulla
Oh dear, Misty, this doesn't sound good at all. How can a car be shot down from a remote? I'm sorry, I must terrible backward. High suspense in this chapter, which I enjoyed immensely.
In your 'previous' section I found this error: Proving its self-defense, = Proving it's self-defense. Can't wait to reading on. Will they somehow make it into the next State? Al the best. Ulla:)))
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2018
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Oh dear, Misty, this doesn't sound good at all. How can a car be shot down from a remote? I'm sorry, I must terrible backward. High suspense in this chapter, which I enjoyed immensely.
In your 'previous' section I found this error: Proving its self-defense, = Proving it's self-defense. Can't wait to reading on. Will they somehow make it into the next State? Al the best. Ulla:)))
Comment Written 19-Jul-2018
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2018
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Thank you for the great review and for catching my mistake. It's greatly appreciated. If the car has Onstar or other security company's device attached to it, the company can shut it down remotely reduce engine speed if it's reported stolen. Some lending company's even put a device on their car to where it won't start if you're behind on payments.
Thank you again for such a kind review, for all your help and support, it's always greatly appreciated, take care.
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Wow, I'm learning all the time.Now i fully understand what is happening. It's a great story and you're writing it so well. :)))
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Thank you so much for all your wonderful praise.
