God Knows
God lead me through some strange places.3 total reviews
Comment from Liz O'Neill
You immediately draw the reader in with your humor: but that is her story, not mine." This is a very powerful story. I like how you summarized all of your life's education and showed how it correlated with the challenges presented to you. This has very organized thinking to it. There is great imagery created here. You have very solid sentence structure. Well written.
reply by the author on 25-May-2018
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You immediately draw the reader in with your humor: but that is her story, not mine." This is a very powerful story. I like how you summarized all of your life's education and showed how it correlated with the challenges presented to you. This has very organized thinking to it. There is great imagery created here. You have very solid sentence structure. Well written.
Comment Written 25-May-2018
reply by the author on 25-May-2018
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Thank you again for your wonderful and specific review.
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You really did an excellent job on clearing those sentences or concepts up.
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Thanks. One reviewer suggested the ending was weak so I tweaked it a little. Thanks for all your support, LIz.
Comment from RodG
Wow! You seem to have embodied that expression "Life begins at fifty." The story you shared was both entertaining and inspiring.
GOOD: Your introduction set the scene and hooked me. I wanted to know what you'd do with the money. I enjoyed hearing what courses you took and how they later benefited you when you dealt with your step-son's suicide and later yourvdaughter's terminal disease. In both cases you showed admirable strength and courage.
WEAK:Your conclusion. I think you need to make it clear to your reader how YOU think getting a college degree helped or molded you. Rod
reply by the author on 24-May-2018
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Wow! You seem to have embodied that expression "Life begins at fifty." The story you shared was both entertaining and inspiring.
GOOD: Your introduction set the scene and hooked me. I wanted to know what you'd do with the money. I enjoyed hearing what courses you took and how they later benefited you when you dealt with your step-son's suicide and later yourvdaughter's terminal disease. In both cases you showed admirable strength and courage.
WEAK:Your conclusion. I think you need to make it clear to your reader how YOU think getting a college degree helped or molded you. Rod
Comment Written 24-May-2018
reply by the author on 24-May-2018
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Thank you Rod. I will take a look at that ending. I really appreciate your comments as I strive to become a better writer.
I did revise my ending. I hope this works better.
Each year I spent at Vermont College of Norwich University added a dimension that would play an important part in my ability to handle pain and tragedy. I never realized how critical it would be to study guided imagery, pain, and death. I became stronger, even when I thought I was only being a rebel. Oh, and that semester I spent reading erotic literature? Well, I am writing... just not erotica... yet!
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Hey! You are a quick learner. That ending paragraph is PERFECT. Rod
Comment from Mustang Patty
Hi, Beck;
Thank you for sharing your story. You show just how strong a person can be through horrible tragedies. By leaning on God, we have more strength than we ever thought possible.
The story is told in a logical order with a circle back to the classes you took.
I wish you luck in the contest,
~patty~
reply by the author on 24-May-2018
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Hi, Beck;
Thank you for sharing your story. You show just how strong a person can be through horrible tragedies. By leaning on God, we have more strength than we ever thought possible.
The story is told in a logical order with a circle back to the classes you took.
I wish you luck in the contest,
~patty~
Comment Written 24-May-2018
reply by the author on 24-May-2018
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Thanks, Patty. God whispers and if we listen to "our gut" He will let us know what we need.
