As Imprint Fades
it fragments57 total reviews
Comment from krys123
Cheers, VICTORTOUCHE;
-I really like this self interrogation of one's principles and understanding the standards and the environment around this person. But mostly day after day a ritual of understanding and awareness occurs."Day by day... Just a fragment Felt it fall and I feel it everyday."
-This next verse first three lines I felt I knew was going on and then I got sideswiped with your following line. "Were you late"
Do you know
When you wake
That they take
XXXXXXXX
" (AND MAY SLAKE)" "Were you late"
It took me off, even with the following verse which is well composed: "That they take" should have been that "they took" off grammatically correct, I think? But with using poetic license one can change that!,
The word SLAKE is to quench or satisfy with water to douse out to extinguish with water.
-The following the following verse perfectly composed:
Did you think
of a fate
that just
chips yourself away
-I'm Just trying to iron up some problems that I was having with myself obviously you have made more sense of it yourself than I did.
-I enjoyed your writing because the spontaneity and mindfulness is exceptional.
-Thank you for sharing and take care and have a good one especially with all those that Love you dearly.
Alex
reply by the author on 01-Jan-2019
Cheers, VICTORTOUCHE;
-I really like this self interrogation of one's principles and understanding the standards and the environment around this person. But mostly day after day a ritual of understanding and awareness occurs."Day by day... Just a fragment Felt it fall and I feel it everyday."
-This next verse first three lines I felt I knew was going on and then I got sideswiped with your following line. "Were you late"
Do you know
When you wake
That they take
XXXXXXXX
" (AND MAY SLAKE)" "Were you late"
It took me off, even with the following verse which is well composed: "That they take" should have been that "they took" off grammatically correct, I think? But with using poetic license one can change that!,
The word SLAKE is to quench or satisfy with water to douse out to extinguish with water.
-The following the following verse perfectly composed:
Did you think
of a fate
that just
chips yourself away
-I'm Just trying to iron up some problems that I was having with myself obviously you have made more sense of it yourself than I did.
-I enjoyed your writing because the spontaneity and mindfulness is exceptional.
-Thank you for sharing and take care and have a good one especially with all those that Love you dearly.
Alex
Comment Written 15-May-2018
reply by the author on 01-Jan-2019
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Thank you for reading me.
Comment from meeshu
a great cadence and rhythm in this work. reads like a song with poignant lyrics and outstanding language. simple form and message, well done VIC.........meeshu
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2019
a great cadence and rhythm in this work. reads like a song with poignant lyrics and outstanding language. simple form and message, well done VIC.........meeshu
Comment Written 15-May-2018
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2019
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Thank you.
Comment from F Scott Hafner
Very interesting piece on aging or so it seems. I'm 66 and just bought a house with a great climbing tree for grandkids. They are starting the transformation as all do. Consider deleting- and, and that.
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2019
Very interesting piece on aging or so it seems. I'm 66 and just bought a house with a great climbing tree for grandkids. They are starting the transformation as all do. Consider deleting- and, and that.
Comment Written 15-May-2018
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2019
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Wish I had grandkids. Thank you.
Comment from Joan E.
I admired your reflections and nostalgia in this free verse. The poem is quite thought provoking, and I was relied that you lightened up the ending just a tad. Sighs- Joan
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2019
I admired your reflections and nostalgia in this free verse. The poem is quite thought provoking, and I was relied that you lightened up the ending just a tad. Sighs- Joan
Comment Written 15-May-2018
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2019
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Smile. Thank you.
Comment from johnwilson
Such a complex profound poem written with precision. I so enjoyed every word. You're a very gifted poet, and I feel honored to read your work for free. I particularly liked the last two stanzas (the whole piece is so sublime that it's like saying the other part isn't flawless--it is) because they lead the reader to the obvious conclusion, "Of course you will." This is deserving of the sixth star, which I no longer have.
reply by the author on 15-May-2018
Such a complex profound poem written with precision. I so enjoyed every word. You're a very gifted poet, and I feel honored to read your work for free. I particularly liked the last two stanzas (the whole piece is so sublime that it's like saying the other part isn't flawless--it is) because they lead the reader to the obvious conclusion, "Of course you will." This is deserving of the sixth star, which I no longer have.
Comment Written 15-May-2018
reply by the author on 15-May-2018
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John, if U stop reviewing me, I'm going to commit...crying. lol
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
What a sad poem. I guess we do lose bits of ourselves as we go on. Memories are sometime all we have left, but they soon fray at the edges. This is a well written poem, and very deep. :) Sandra xx
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2019
What a sad poem. I guess we do lose bits of ourselves as we go on. Memories are sometime all we have left, but they soon fray at the edges. This is a well written poem, and very deep. :) Sandra xx
Comment Written 15-May-2018
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2019
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Thank you, Sandra.
Comment from LIJ Red
Brain docs have said that every time a brain accesses a memory, it loses a digital bit or two, so it is not your imagination...time wounds all heels... excellent poem.
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2019
Brain docs have said that every time a brain accesses a memory, it loses a digital bit or two, so it is not your imagination...time wounds all heels... excellent poem.
Comment Written 15-May-2018
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2019
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Hmmm. That would explain a lot, Shoot.
Comment from nomi338
A very clear if cryptic summary of my very life, my every day. It appears that either we live very similar lives or you have been watching me and taking notes. On any level, that is cause for fear and alarm. LOL.
reply by the author on 04-Jan-2019
A very clear if cryptic summary of my very life, my every day. It appears that either we live very similar lives or you have been watching me and taking notes. On any level, that is cause for fear and alarm. LOL.
Comment Written 15-May-2018
reply by the author on 04-Jan-2019
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I find that you have learned many of life's lessons. I look to your reviews with great respect.
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You sir, both honor and humble me. Thank you.
Comment from duchessofdrumborg
"As Imprint Fades", is an extremely well-written and thought-provoking piece. This talented poet's work was a pleasure to both read and review. You KEEP WRITING and I'll KEEP READING. I look forward to seeing your next post.
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2019
"As Imprint Fades", is an extremely well-written and thought-provoking piece. This talented poet's work was a pleasure to both read and review. You KEEP WRITING and I'll KEEP READING. I look forward to seeing your next post.
Comment Written 15-May-2018
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2019
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Thank you, my Lady.
You're welcome, kind Sir.
Comment from dragonpoet
This free verse hits me as very sad. It seems to say everyone loses a bit of themselves every day never to see it again. That is true with the death of
a loved one. In a physical sense they are gone forever but they are still
here in memory and the love they gave you. This could be just an exetneded
metaphor on the aging process.
Keep writing
Joan
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2019
This free verse hits me as very sad. It seems to say everyone loses a bit of themselves every day never to see it again. That is true with the death of
a loved one. In a physical sense they are gone forever but they are still
here in memory and the love they gave you. This could be just an exetneded
metaphor on the aging process.
Keep writing
Joan
Comment Written 15-May-2018
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2019
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Thank you.
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No problem, Victor.
Joan