Comment from brenda faye curtis

Exceptional

This is a brilliant little story and poem, Bill! I love the bouncy text, the light-hearted humor--well, everything about it. While I was reading, I could see the action and I was laughing out loud!

 Comment Written 17-May-2018

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reply by the author on 17-May-2018

Thanks, Brenda, for the great review. Bill

reply by brenda faye curtis on 23-May-2018

You're welcome, Bill!

Comment from happykat4

Excellent

Cute short story within your poem. Poor Spanky. The reader can see this little boy thinking if he could get into the pop machine, he'd have it made. He didn't quite make out like he hoped. Nice. Kat

 Comment Written 17-May-2018

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reply by the author on 17-May-2018

Thanks, Kat

Comment from royowen

Excellent

What a very cute little ditty Bill, I love it, so much fun, unfortunately we don't read enough of these. This rollicking work is written in tetrametric quatrains and aabb rhyming. Smoothly flowing which makes a delightful read, poor Spanky, it's not often a pop machine falls over. Well done, blessings, Roy

 Comment Written 17-May-2018

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reply by the author on 17-May-2018

Thanks, Roy. Fun to write this one.

reply by royowen on 17-May-2018

Well done Bill,

Comment from Spitfire

Good

To qualify as a short story, shouldn't this be written in straight lines, rather than poetic format?
Spanky is certainly sponging off the candy machine and got what he deserved! Cute story.

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 15-May-2018

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reply by the author on 15-May-2018

Character, setting, point of view, plot, and theme. That?s a short story. Rhyme is not a factor.

Comment from Dolly'sPoems

Excellent

He he he, this is a very clever write and I enjoyed the language used, the rhymes, the speed of the words the flow! You nailed it with this one, a fun write Bill, love Dolly x

 Comment Written 14-May-2018

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reply by the author on 14-May-2018

Thanks, Dolly

Comment from judiverse

Excellent

You cannot get away with trying to sponge off a vending machine. Now Spanky will have to pay the price. This is a lot of fun. The machines probably have some kind of built-in alarm to notify the police when someone tampers with them. At least Spanky got some refreshment before he was arrested. judi

 Comment Written 14-May-2018

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reply by the author on 14-May-2018

Skanky comes from on e of the ?porous? communities.

reply by judiverse on 14-May-2018

That's still no excuse. Let him find a job like the other hard-working sponges instead of stealing from vending machines! judi

Comment from lyenochka

Excellent

Well, I guess that was almost a predictable end - is this a kind of a moralistic fable. Don't kick the vending machine or you will be squashed? Fun one, Bill.

 Comment Written 14-May-2018

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reply by the author on 14-May-2018

Thanks, lyenochka.

Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell

Excellent

LOL! Where do you get these from? This one is so funny, I love his name and how he went around kicking the machines to get a freebie, it didn't work and the police copped him, lol! Excellent. :) Sandra xxx

 Comment Written 14-May-2018

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reply by the author on 14-May-2018

Thanks, Sandra

Comment from damommy

Excellent

The little thief. You know those sponges. They soak up everything around them. lol He got his comeuppance.

cute story with good rhythm and rhyme.

 Comment Written 14-May-2018

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reply by the author on 14-May-2018

Thanks,da

Comment from nomi338

Excellent

Shame on you Bill. You should have to the little gutter snipe that crime does not pay. Now he is going in to the slammer smelling sweet and every single guy in there is going to want to take a bite.

 Comment Written 13-May-2018

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reply by the author on 14-May-2018

Scuff-laws get caught up with.