The Snake
A Crown of Heroic Sonnets for the contest50 total reviews
Comment from Pearl Edwards
You've done well in the first stanzas, I even felt sorry for this snake.
Good comparison between himself and the snake, both having rested, both imprisoned, one by the walls of the well the other by his own thoughts and age. A very well written Crown of Sonnets Tony, what a challenge and well done.
cheers,
valda
reply by the author on 09-May-2018
  |
You've done well in the first stanzas, I even felt sorry for this snake.
Good comparison between himself and the snake, both having rested, both imprisoned, one by the walls of the well the other by his own thoughts and age. A very well written Crown of Sonnets Tony, what a challenge and well done.
cheers,
valda
Comment Written 02-May-2018
reply by the author on 09-May-2018
-
What a lovely review, Valda. Six stars, too! Thank you so much. Greatly appreciated. Tony.
Comment from Spitfire
Amazing. I got so caught up in this story, easy to read aloud and interpret dramatically. The repetition makes for smooth transitions, and I love the bookend close. Such a lesson in here about caring for others who like us only want to survive.
reply by the author on 09-May-2018
|
Amazing. I got so caught up in this story, easy to read aloud and interpret dramatically. The repetition makes for smooth transitions, and I love the bookend close. Such a lesson in here about caring for others who like us only want to survive.
Comment Written 02-May-2018
reply by the author on 09-May-2018
-
What a lovely review, Shari. Six stars, too! Thank you so much. Greatly appreciated. Tony.
Comment from l.raven
OMG Tony, if this doesn't win...something is wrong...I sat on the edge of the couch reading this...taking in deep breaths my sweet friend...every word pulls you in...and you can't wait to see what will happen next...this is a brilliant sonnet Tony...what a writer you are...and I am so glad she said...Release...and the snake was set free...I'm not sure why they have to be so dangerous to be here...but God put them here for a reason...my father had to look out for water moccasins where he lived...this was amazing Tony...very well written you...and the picture....EEEKKKK...story so very well told...love Linda xxoo
reply by the author on 01-May-2018
|
OMG Tony, if this doesn't win...something is wrong...I sat on the edge of the couch reading this...taking in deep breaths my sweet friend...every word pulls you in...and you can't wait to see what will happen next...this is a brilliant sonnet Tony...what a writer you are...and I am so glad she said...Release...and the snake was set free...I'm not sure why they have to be so dangerous to be here...but God put them here for a reason...my father had to look out for water moccasins where he lived...this was amazing Tony...very well written you...and the picture....EEEKKKK...story so very well told...love Linda xxoo
Comment Written 01-May-2018
reply by the author on 01-May-2018
-
Such a lovely review, Linda, and a shower of stars to go with it! Thank you! So glad that the narrative style appealed and kept you going from one sonnet to the next in this lengthy sequence. I can't say that I'm particularly fond of snakes, but I guess they have their place, and the mindset changes a bit when one sees a creature trapped.
-
yes it does...and you are so welcome Tony...ALWAYS...love xxoo
Comment from pome lover
bravo! and whew!
I read this out loud and as it progressed I was fascinated not only by the account but
by your choice of words so beautifully phrased. And bless the young, brave girl.
But I don't blame you for your caution. good decision.
Also, I have to say, this new picture of you and the child on our shoulder - both with arms outstretched - in just darling. Happy, happy!
Katharine - pome lover
reply by the author on 01-May-2018
|
bravo! and whew!
I read this out loud and as it progressed I was fascinated not only by the account but
by your choice of words so beautifully phrased. And bless the young, brave girl.
But I don't blame you for your caution. good decision.
Also, I have to say, this new picture of you and the child on our shoulder - both with arms outstretched - in just darling. Happy, happy!
Katharine - pome lover
Comment Written 01-May-2018
reply by the author on 01-May-2018
-
Such a lovely review, Katharine, and a shower of stars to go with it! Thank you! So glad that the narrative style appealed and kept you going from one sonnet to the next in this lengthy sequence. I can't say that I'm particularly fond of snakes, but I guess they have their place, and the mindset changes a bit when one sees a creature trapped. I was glad to see this one set free and especially glad that it was located some place else! LOL
I put together a little picture book called Teagan Likes to Ride, assembling some of the pictures from her visit over Christmas, and the one I've used for my profile was on the title page. Fortunately there didn't seem to be any snakes about while they were here!
-
well, I bet you really enjoyed her.
I'm not particularly fond of snakes, either, but when I moved to Texas I was a zoo docent for awhile and I had a boa constrictor - only three feet, but still... that I had to have wrapped around my waist and up my right arm when we visited schools. My family was most impressed. I named him Bo and wrote a story about him which got published in Cricket Magazine - so it ended well.
Comment from His Grayness
I will now trade my "spell binding" into stars of genuine delight, to know my dear friend avoided an end of what could have been a deadly bite! Having been there myself in AUSSIE LAND, and encountered a reptile in the sand, of deadly mission was his' I was told by a confident neighbor though quite old, who quickly stepped upon the snake's neck whilst I became a nervous wreck, then he bent right down and captured the snake in his bare fist and snapped it's neck with a violent twist!
Last I saw they both on their way to the place where old Aussies and snakes go to play. So glad for the lesson I shall never forget
If you play with the snakes you will likely regret!
reply by the author on 01-May-2018
|
I will now trade my "spell binding" into stars of genuine delight, to know my dear friend avoided an end of what could have been a deadly bite! Having been there myself in AUSSIE LAND, and encountered a reptile in the sand, of deadly mission was his' I was told by a confident neighbor though quite old, who quickly stepped upon the snake's neck whilst I became a nervous wreck, then he bent right down and captured the snake in his bare fist and snapped it's neck with a violent twist!
Last I saw they both on their way to the place where old Aussies and snakes go to play. So glad for the lesson I shall never forget
If you play with the snakes you will likely regret!
Comment Written 01-May-2018
reply by the author on 01-May-2018
-
Delighted by your poetic review and accolade of stars, Vance! He's a brave man but foolish who interferes with snakes. They are best left alone. Almost all fatalities here in Australia occur when people confront them rather than avoiding them. My preferred option is to step backwards very slowly and carefully!
-
Oh! I do so agree..I never even got to be relaxed in knowing spiders were around! especially the day I raised the old garage door and brought a full nest of Redback spiders into my tea shirt! it certainly put a new meaning to getting STRIPPED!
-
Scary! I had a similar incident when I lost control of a 4-wheel bike on a wet slope and slid into the duck shed which had a nest of huntsmen spiders in the gutter. A lapful of muddy water and spiders scurrying in all directions precipitated a short, sharp one-word poem!
-
Well, if there is only one place in the world where nature's delights and fears and outright shocks come and go like rain, it certainly AUSTRALIA! Amen!!!
Comment from Phillip C Kuhn
This was a great piece, and admittedly didn't quite understand it all due to its extensive vocabulary as I am trying to broaden mine, so I enjoy pieces that force me to educate myself on words and verbiage, it was put together gracefully and in a way made me a little more well rounded as well, so thank you.
reply by the author on 01-May-2018
 |
This was a great piece, and admittedly didn't quite understand it all due to its extensive vocabulary as I am trying to broaden mine, so I enjoy pieces that force me to educate myself on words and verbiage, it was put together gracefully and in a way made me a little more well rounded as well, so thank you.
Comment Written 01-May-2018
reply by the author on 01-May-2018
-
Thank you for your kind words, Phillip. Glad you enjoyed it. Best wishes, Tony.
Comment from Gloria ....
I very much enjoyed your Crown, Tony. I liked the snake part so much I wish you would've written a wreath of sonnets, because that snake was doing some interesting in order to survive.
I love your questions about should one save or let die a creature and one of the overwhelming questions God faces on a daily basis only for billions and billions of charges. Can you imagine it? Great assertion that evil might in fact be good.
Luckily youth came along with much less fear of reptiles than we older bunch poisonous or not.
Exceptional metre and rhyme and a fine, fine tale.
Best wishes to you in the contest.
Gloria
reply by the author on 01-May-2018
|
I very much enjoyed your Crown, Tony. I liked the snake part so much I wish you would've written a wreath of sonnets, because that snake was doing some interesting in order to survive.
I love your questions about should one save or let die a creature and one of the overwhelming questions God faces on a daily basis only for billions and billions of charges. Can you imagine it? Great assertion that evil might in fact be good.
Luckily youth came along with much less fear of reptiles than we older bunch poisonous or not.
Exceptional metre and rhyme and a fine, fine tale.
Best wishes to you in the contest.
Gloria
Comment Written 01-May-2018
reply by the author on 01-May-2018
-
A wreath might have been stretching things a bit! However, it does give a point to the repeating lines, which form the fifteenth sonnet, and at least each one is a traditional 14-line sonnet, which I prefer to the elongated form. Perhaps I'll try it one day, when I have a clear month or two!
Thanks very much for your comments which, as usual, got right to the nub of the poem.
Comment from Ginnygray
Tony, some people have an inate talent for the aesthetic arts, and I believe you to be one of those. I truly enjoy reading poetry that tells a story with the ebb and flow of a sonata, 1st movement, (exposition, development, recapitulation). The rhythmic flow of the meter, the iambic pentameter was so fluid like a harmonic progression rising and falling to the cadence. I need to study much more the names given to these sonnets because I get confused between Sicilian vs Italian vs Petrarchan. Your author's notes were splendid! I just need to examine it further, but I did want to give you a great review and congratulate you on a great Crown of Heroic Sonnets!
reply by the author on 01-May-2018
|
Tony, some people have an inate talent for the aesthetic arts, and I believe you to be one of those. I truly enjoy reading poetry that tells a story with the ebb and flow of a sonata, 1st movement, (exposition, development, recapitulation). The rhythmic flow of the meter, the iambic pentameter was so fluid like a harmonic progression rising and falling to the cadence. I need to study much more the names given to these sonnets because I get confused between Sicilian vs Italian vs Petrarchan. Your author's notes were splendid! I just need to examine it further, but I did want to give you a great review and congratulate you on a great Crown of Heroic Sonnets!
Comment Written 01-May-2018
reply by the author on 01-May-2018
-
I do so appreciate your comments about the musicality and the structure of this suite of poems, Ginny.
The Italian and Petrarchan sonnets are one and the same thing and the Sicilian is an earlier form that is very similar, consisting of an octet and a sestet, but with a different and more fixed rhyme scheme (abababab cdcdcd). All three of them generally set up a question in the octet and a resolution in the sestet.
Thanks very much for your award of six stars and for your kind words about my Crown.
Best wishes, Tony
Comment from LIJ Red
We have copperhead, rattler, cottonmouth and coral, all lazy fellows who only bite when pushed.(and a myriad nonpoisonous types) so I generally ignore snakes. Fireants and killer bees, even yellowjackets scare me worse. An interesting saga, this crown of sonnets. Excellent.
reply by the author on 01-May-2018
|
We have copperhead, rattler, cottonmouth and coral, all lazy fellows who only bite when pushed.(and a myriad nonpoisonous types) so I generally ignore snakes. Fireants and killer bees, even yellowjackets scare me worse. An interesting saga, this crown of sonnets. Excellent.
Comment Written 01-May-2018
reply by the author on 01-May-2018
-
I'm glad to say we don't have fire ants or killer bees. The red bellied black snake is shy and not quite so venomous as some. However, we also have quite a number of Eastern Browns that are lethal and sometimes aggressive. As with all snakes, best avoided. Almost all deaths occur when people try to interfere with them.
Comment from w.j.debi
I salute you for your accomplishment. A crown of heroic sonnets is no small feat, especially one that is so well crafted. Not only did you stick to the required sonnet form and required repeating lines, but you told an excellent fable that gives us much to ponder about life and its purpose.
Best of luck in the contest with this wonderful entry.
reply by the author on 01-May-2018
|
I salute you for your accomplishment. A crown of heroic sonnets is no small feat, especially one that is so well crafted. Not only did you stick to the required sonnet form and required repeating lines, but you told an excellent fable that gives us much to ponder about life and its purpose.
Best of luck in the contest with this wonderful entry.
Comment Written 30-Apr-2018
reply by the author on 01-May-2018
-
Many thanks, WJ, for your kind words and accolade of six stars. Glad you found a little to chew over in this one. Best wishes, Tony
