Reviews from

Perennials of War

Viewing comments for Chapter 69 "Chapter Einundzwanzig part zwei"
Is Anderson a gallant knight? Can he recover Shan

29 total reviews 
Comment from Mastery
Excellent
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Well written chapter, Barbara. I think Shana has found a true love in the making. I like the way you have the romance bulding slowly. I could feel the atmosphere around that kiss. Blessings. Bob

 Comment Written 19-Mar-2018


reply by the author on 19-Mar-2018
    Thank you for the encouragement.
Comment from Rasmine
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Hello, Barbara, :)

They will get together. I can feel it.

Good chapter. Sorry about the hit out on Shana and Anderson. I never heard that as a first name before reading this.

Take care,
Nome

 Comment Written 19-Mar-2018


reply by the author on 19-Mar-2018
    I have a friend who's husband is Anderson, so I took it. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from giraffmang
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Hi Barbara,

Well, Anderson keeps trying but the crap keeps escalating. the hit is interesting - should keep things interesting.

'Good morning, Mr. Sharp." - change the opening speech mark here to match the closing one.


 Comment Written 19-Mar-2018


reply by the author on 19-Mar-2018
    Thank you for catching that. I can't believe I missed it or the other reviewers didn't catch it.
Comment from Alexander Vasa
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Hello, you write well and have really notched up a lot of chapters in your book. I wonder about the title, whether other readers will understand what it means. Your author notes are good and you've put a lot of work into them, I also noticed that your dialogue is very realistic, one of your strengths as a writer. Thanks for sharing your story, Ana.

 Comment Written 19-Mar-2018


reply by the author on 19-Mar-2018
    I'm not sure if you mean the name of the book or the name of this post. The name of the post is for me only, so I can keep them straight. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from apky
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Excellent write with no spags. The only thing I still long for is a stronger Shana, a young woman with her own mind and presence of personality. But that's my take.

"That he is." Shana walked over to the table and sat. "I see our table is free." ~ a little stupid, announcing that the table is free AFTER she has gone and sat at the table. You can switch the sentences around.

His jaw set and tried to contain his anger as he relayed the conversation to Shana. ~ you need to rephrase this sentence; I'm sure it's not his set jaw that tried to contain his anger.

 Comment Written 18-Mar-2018


reply by the author on 19-Mar-2018
    Thank you, I will work on those areas. I promise you Shana will grow.
Comment from rheabug
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This is a good post. Your story is coming together very nicely. I enjoyed as always and envy all that you do with you writing. Toby Keith's song was a nice touch. Hugs

 Comment Written 18-Mar-2018


reply by the author on 19-Mar-2018
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Ulla
Excellent
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Hi Babara, so the romance is about to start but there always seem to come something in between before it ever happens. Well, I suppose I have to be patient. "Good bye." ="Goodbye," All the best. Ulla:)))

 Comment Written 18-Mar-2018


reply by the author on 19-Mar-2018
    Thank you for the kind review. I will recheck good bye.
Comment from Gert sherwood
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Hello Barb
I don't know how you can write about true love between Anderson and Shana, and what does their first kiss really means;
along with the suspense of the missing art and leaving us readers wondering what is going to happen in your next chapter
Gert

 Comment Written 18-Mar-2018


reply by the author on 18-Mar-2018
    I'm wondering too. LOL I want to mention that Shana's father has a few tricks up his sleeve. Thank you for the kind review.
reply by Gert sherwood on 18-Mar-2018
    You are welcome Barb
    Gert
Comment from Sugarray77
Excellent
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You are doing a job of moving this story right along with emotion and meaning. You ended by building tension from the outside which heightens the relationship between Anderson and Shana. Good job.

 Comment Written 18-Mar-2018


reply by the author on 18-Mar-2018
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from c_lucas
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

I have often kissed a woman on her lips without knowing her and received a pleasant surprise in return. I have never been slapped because of it. This is very well written.

 Comment Written 18-Mar-2018


reply by the author on 18-Mar-2018
    You are extremely lucky, then. Thank you for the kind review.
reply by c_lucas on 19-Mar-2018
    In some ways, Barbara. Charlie